Insurgent - Tobias POV
by Johanna8D
Summary: Well, it's basically what the Title says... Insurgent but from Tobias Point of View. Y'all seemed to enjoy my Divergent from Tobias POV so here's Insurgent. Hope you enjoy! :) - TEMPORARY BREAK -
1. On Our Way

We're getting close to Amity Headquarters, and it's almost time to jump of the train. I look down at Tris, leaning against the wall of the train car, asleep. She looks so peaceful, even though her arm is covered in blood and she just lost both her parents. It pains me to have to wake her, bring her back to the cruelty of reality. But I have to do it.

I crouch down in front of her, gently putting a hand on her good shoulder.

She takes in a deep breath, holds it for a while and then breathes out.

"Tris, come on", I say. "We have to jump."

I grab her hand and help her stand up, walking with her toward the door. Peter jumps off first, followed by Marcus and then Caleb. Tris takes my hand as we stand in the doorway, and then we jump. I land hard on the ground, although on my feet, unlike Caleb for example. I turn to look at the high, not-climbable fence. We're completely alone – the gate is unguarded.

"There are supposed to be Dauntless guards here", my father says. "Where are they?"

"They were probably under the simulation," I reply, "and are now…" I stop to think for a moment. We stopped the simulation, but I have no idea what happened to the Dauntless after that, or where they went. "Who knows where, doing who knows what", I finally say.

At least it'll make it easier for us to pass through. I walk up to the little metal keypad next to the gate.

"Let's hope the Erudite didn't think to change this combination", I say, mostly to myself, as I type in the eight-number code I was taught while working in the control room.

"How did you know that?" Caleb asks. He sounds different, voice full of emotion.

"I worked in the Dauntless control room, monitoring the security system", I explain. "We only change the codes twice a year."

"How lucky," Caleb says, giving me a look of something I can't quite place.

"Luck has nothing to do with it. I only worked there because I wanted to make sure I could get out", I reply.

Turns out it was useful after all.

Tris takes the lead as we walk, and I stay close to her. It feels like every moment with her is important. I almost lost her today.

Peter and Marcus walks behind us, Marcus supporting Peter who holds his wounded arm against his chest. Caleb walks somewhere in the middle.

After a while we reach an orchard that we have to walk through to get to Amity headquarters. Between the thick trees shines glowing windows, and the light gives me hope, hope that we'll be safe again.

When we're nearing the end of the orchard Marcus walks up to us, saying: "I know where to go."

We follow him to the second building to our left. I'm not sure how he's able to remember which building is the right one, since they all look pretty much the same, built in thick, dark wood.

Marcus opens the door and we walk into a room so quiet it makes our footsteps sound incredibly loud. He then leads us to a room where someone who could only be Johanna Reyes sits, looking out through a window.

"Oh, thank God", she says, walking toward Marcus with arms outstretched. But instead of hugging him, like I thought she would, she touches his shoulders.

I have to admit that even though half her face is covered by a thick scar stretching from her forehead down to her lip, she's still kind of beautiful, in her own way.  
"The other members of your party got here a few hours ago, but they weren't sure if you had made it", Johanna says. I'm not sure which group she's referring to, but I decide not to ask.

Johanna studies our group, looking first at me, then Caleb, Tris, and finally Peter.

"Oh my", she says as her eyes fall on his bloody arm. "I'll send for a doctor. I can grant you all permission to stay the night, but tomorrow, our community must decide together. And," she gives Tris and me a stern look, "they will likely not be enthusiastic about a Dauntless presence in our compound. I of course ask you to turn over any weapons you might have."

I do not doubt to give her my weapon, since it's obvious and would only cause trouble if I kept hit, but when Tris reaches back for a weapon that's not visible I take her hand and guide it away. We might need some sort of protection later.

"My name is Johanna Reyes", Johanna says, shaking Tris's hand and then mine. It suddenly hits me that the way she greeted Marcus was very Abnegation-like, with as minimal touching as possible, and the shaking of hands was a more Dauntless greeting. Amity is indeed the kindest faction.

"This is T-" Marcus starts introducing, but I interrupt him.

"My name is Four", I say. "This is Tris," I gesture with my hand, "Caleb, and Peter."

I don't know why, but I didn't want people to call me by my first name here. It made me feel so exposed. I also didn't want people to hear my name and think of me as the Abnegation leader Marcus's son, because I'm not. I'm a completely different person.

"Welcome to the Amity compound", Johanna says, smiling. "Let us take care of you."

Peter is taken away to the hospital wing of the compound and Tris is given a healing salve for her shoulder before Johanna escorts us to the cafeteria. There are Abnegation members there, and some of them recognize Tris and Marcus and come forward to greet them with smiles and a lot of tears.

Tris holds on to my arm, and when I look at her she looks sad, pained.

One of the Abnegation gives her a cup with pink liquid and says: "Drink this. It will help you sleep as it helped some of the others sleep. No dreams."

Tris empties the cup pretty quickly and her grip of my arm loosens. She blinks slowly now, as if her eye_ weights too much to keep them open. Johanna calls for someone who tells me they're going to show us to our rooms. I support Tris as we walk through several hallways until we reach the right room. I lift Tris up and put her in the bed, and she mumbles something before she immediately falls asleep.

Then I'm escorted to my own room. A red t-shirt lays waiting for me on the bed. I'm not sure if I like the color at all, but I change into it anyways and decide to get some rest. I fall asleep pretty quickly.

**Aaah, first chapter of Insurgent from Tobias POV! What did you guys think? Was it as good as my Divergent story or was it worse? Please leave a review telling me what you thought, it really means a lot. Thanks y'all! :)**

**P.S I know I said I'd probably write Insurgent next year but I couldn't wait, it's such an amazing story. **


	2. Decisions, decisions

I wake up by the sunlight shining at me through the window. I get up and pull my hand through my hair a couple of times. Then I start walking towards Tris's room. On my way there I bump into the same girl who'd shown Tris and me to our rooms last night.

"Here's some medicine for your girl", she says with a smile, handing me a small bottle with clear liquid inside. "She was still sleeping when I checked in and I didn't want to wake her. By the way, the Amity is meeting in the orchard to decide who gets to stay in about a half hour. Thought you should know. And I'll tell the girls brother, too."

Then she walks toward the direction I came from and I keep walking to Tris's room, wondering in the back of my mind how she knew about our relations to each other, if she was just guessing. I knock on her door before entering.

"Come in", Tris's voice calls out.

I open the door and take a small step inside. She looks better, her eyes brighter today.

"The Amity are meeting in a half hour. To decide our fate", I tell her with a dramatic touch.

"Never thought my fate would be in the hands of a bunch of Amity", she says, shaking her head.

"Me either." I suddenly remember what I'm holding in my hand. "Oh, I brought you something. Pain medicine. Take a dropperful every six hours." I take of the cap of the bottle and hands her the dropper.

"Thanks", she says, tilting her head back and squeezing the dropper into her mouth.

"How are you, Beatrice?" I ask her. I decide to give her real name a try, because when I look at her in this moment it doesn't feel right to call her Tris. That's the name she chose to escape her Abnegation past, to become Dauntless, but we're factionless now. Tris is her name, but the name she left behind is also part of who she is.

"Did you just call me Beatrice?"

"Thought I would give it a try. Not good?" I smile.

"Maybe on special occasion only. Initiation days, Choosing Days…" She stops. Abnegation holidays. She didn't get the chance to learn the Dauntless holidays, but I guess it doesn't matter now. I'm not even sure if Dauntless will still exist after all of this is over.

I ignore the thought, because it's too painful and confusing to think about.

"It's a deal", I say. "How are you, Tris?"

She stiffens a little and she takes a while to answer my question, like she really has to think about it.

"I'm.." she says, shaking her head. "I don't know, Four. I'm awake. I…" She doesn't stop with the shaking of her head.

It pains me to see her hurt this bad, but I'm not sure how to comfort her. I reach forward, touching her cheek gently with my hand. A tingling feeling spreads through my body when we touch, and I bend down and kiss her. I feel her hands wrapping around my arm, hard.

"I know", I say. "Sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

She might not be able to find words for her feelings, but I understand that she's nowhere near okay. She just lost her parents. I allow myself to think about my mother for a short second, allowing myself to remember the grief I felt.

"I'll let you get ready", I say, letting go of her.

As I close the door to her room behind me I just stand there for a couple of seconds, unsure where to go. I look down at my hands and they're full of reminders of what has happened the last twenty-four hours. My nails and fingers are covered in dirt and my knuckles are red and split from punching. _Tris? _

I shake the thought and the guilt away. I was under a simulation- I didn't know what I was doing. I would _never _hurt her intentionally.

I head to the Men's bathroom to wash my hands, but when I get there I figure I might as well just take a shower. I can almost not remember the last time I took a shower, when everything was normal and I was living in the Dauntless compound. It seems so long ago, although it has only been a couple of days.

Time flies as I shower and when I get out it's time to head to the meeting. I meet Caleb outside and we decide to go get Tris together. I knock on her door again and she opens almost immediately. At first I think we stopped at the wrong door, because she looks so different. But then I realise that her hair is just shorter- a lot shorter. Although I liked her long hair, she looks more striking with short hair. It makes her features sharper, making her appearance even more magnetic to me.

"You cut your hair", Caleb says.

"Yeah", replies Tris. "It's… to hot for long hair."

The pause in the middle makes me think that wasn't the real reason for her to cut her hair off, but I don't say anything.

"Fair enough", says Caleb and we start walking.

The air outside is warm and thick, realizing Tris actually had a point about it being to warm for long hair.

"Does everyone know you're Marcus's son?" Caleb asks me. "The Abnegation, I mean?"

"Not to my knowledge. And I would appreciate it if you didn't mention it", I reply, giving him a stern look.

"I don't need to mention it. Anyone with eyes can see it for themselves." He pauses and frowns. "How old are you, anyway?"

"Eighteen."

"And you don't think you're too old to be with my little sister?"

I let out a cold laugh. As far as I know, Caleb recently chose to stand for the principle _Faction before blood_ and dismissed Tris when she came to him for help during Dauntless initiation. What a big brother.

"She's not your little anything", I say.

"Stop it," Tris says before Caleb has the chance to answer. "Both of you."

**Sorry, had to end it here or it would've been too long, but I promise the next chapter will be longer. So what did you think? Was it good? I tried to write some things Tobias did without Tris being around, things that weren't in the book. Do u guys like that or not? Please leave a review answering those questions and I'll see you next time! Bye :)**


	3. When Words are Not Enough

We follow a crowd of Amity into a circular building made entirely of glass. Several trees and other plants grow around the edges of the greenhouse, and Johanna Reyes stands in the middle of the room among the roots of a huge tree that grow in a pool of water.

I touch my hand to Tris's back, guiding her toward an empty space among the Amity and the Abnegation sitting on the floor. She looks sad as she looks at the rows of the Abnegation members, and I wonder if she's thinking about her parents.

Before we sit down on the floor, I lean in and put my mouth close to her ear.  
"I like your hair that way", I whisper.

She smiles a little, which was what I was hoping to see, but the smile doesn't quite reach her eyes. We sit down and she leans against me as Johanna lifts her hand, looking down at the floor. The voices in the room fades away and it's soon dead quiet. I see people whispering to themselves and I wonder if they're praying.

After a few seconds Johanna says: "We have before us today an urgent question, which is: How will we conduct ourselves in this time of conflict as people who pursue peace?"

As soon as she stops talking the people in the room starts to chatter with each other, each and every one of them with different opinions and well thought-through arguments.

"How do they get anything done?" says Tris after a few minutes of loud chattering.

"They don't care about efficiency, they care about agreement", I reply. "Watch."

After several minutes of loud chattering the small groups of discussing people grow bigger. A group of three women join another group of four men. A woman dressed in yellow step forward to connect two other groups, and soon almost everyone in the room have risen to become a few, big groups. They are now standing quiet, waiting for the last people who are still discussing.

"This is bizarre", Tris says.

"I think it's beautiful."

She gives me a strange look, like I must be crazy to think that.

"What?" I say with a laugh. "They each have an equal role in government; they each feel equally responsible. And it makes them care; it makes them kind. I think that's beautiful."

Kindness. It's something I've always wanted and tried hard to possess, but it doesn't come naturally to me. But I think meeting Tris has helped me. She's always so strong and kind, which is what I love about her. Being with her has also required me to be kind. I've never had to be nice to anyone because I had almost no friends, but with Tris I have to be kind if I don't want to loose her. And I really, really don't.

"I think it's unsustainable", Tris replies. "Sure, it works for the Amity. But what happens when not everyone wants to strum banjos and grow crops? What happens when someone does something terrible and talking about it can't solve the problem?"

She's got a point. This terrible thing has already happened and I'm not sure just talking about it will solve anything.

So I shrug and say: "I guess we'll find out."

One person from each of the groups in the room walks up to Johanna and says something to her, too quiet for the rest of us to hear.

"They're not going to let us argue with them, are they", Tris says, but it's not a question.

"I doubt it."

No, the people in this room have already made up their minds and we've got nothing to say about it.  
When everyone has returned to the group Johanna speaks up for the people of Amity.

"Our faction has had a close relationship with Erudite for as long as any of us can remember", Johanna says, her voice calm and soft as she looks out over the crowd. "We need each other to survive, and we have always cooperated with each other. But we have also had a strong relationship with Abnegation in the past, and we do not think it is right to revoke the hand of friendship when it has for so long been extended.

We feel that the only way to preserve our relationships with both factions is to remain impartial and uninvolved. Your presence here, though welcome, complicates that."

It feels like my heart has dropped to the bottom of my stomach. This doesn't sound good.

"We have arrived at the conclusion," she says, "that we will establish our faction headquarters as a safe house for members of all factions, under a set of conditions. The first is that no weaponry of any kind is allowed on the compound. The second is that if any serious conflict arises, verbal or physical, all involved parties will be asked to leave." I remember the tension between Tris and Peter and the hate I feel for my father, and our future here doesn't look very bright, but a flare of hope still burns inside of me.

"The third is," Johanna continues, "that the conflict may not be discussed, even privately, within the confines of this compound. And the fourth is that everyone who stays here must contribute to the welfare of this environment by working. We will report this to Erudite, Candor and Dauntless as soon as we can. You are welcome to stay here if and only if you can abide by our rules." Johanna is now looking directly at Tris and me as she keeps talking. "That is our decision."

That flare of hope inside of me dies like someone threw a bucket of water on it.

"We won't be able to stay long", Tris says to me, almost like she read my mind.

"No, we won't", I reply.

Tris, Caleb and I walk quietly back to our rooms, neither of us in the mood for talking. Our future in the Amity compound doesn't seem to be very long lasting.

When I'm back in my room I sit down on my bed, just thinking.

What if the Erudite get here before we leave and try to get rid of us? How far will the Amity go to prevent conflict, and if they don't choose to stand by and do nothing, which side will they take? Also, if we won't be able to stay here for much longer, where will we go next? To the Candor? How would they try to solve the problem, would they come up with a better solution then the Amity? At least they won't lie or avoid the truth.

There are so many questions in my head and I can't sort them out or answer them, and it gives me a headache. I press my palms to my face to try and block the thoughts out, but it doesn't work. I get up and look through the shelves in my room, trying to find some pain-reducing medicine. I find what I was looking for and swallow one of the pills with a sip of water. Then someone knocks on my door.

I open the door and Caleb walks in, looking thoughtful.

"Everything alright?" I ask him.

"Yeah, fine", says Caleb. "I just wanted to talk to you about something."

I wait for him to continue.

"About Beatrice", he finally says.

"Oh, the big brother talk", I say with a smile. "I can't say I'm surprised."

"It's not the big brother talk, I just want to get to know you better", protests Caleb. "You know, make sure my sister isn't dating a psycho or anything."

I sit down on my bed. "What do you want to know?"

"Well, you can start by telling me how you two met."

"Okay, um… well, your sister transferred to Dauntless, as you know, and joined the group of initiates that were trained and mentored by me. I could see from the very beginning that she was very brave and strong- mentally strong, maybe not physically. Our initiation process consists of three stages, the first physical which means fighting and firing a gun, but also knife-throwing which she was good at, but she was even better at the second and third stage, the primarily emotional and mental stuff. I guess during these stages we just… got to know each other. Anyways, I wanted to tell you that I really like your sister, and I'm not messing around or anything. I don't want to hurt her."

"Well, good. I believe you", Caleb says, nodding. Then he lifts his eyebrows. "Hold on, you said my sister were good at knife-throwing, from the start?"

"Um, yes. Well, she was good for a beginner, anyways. But now she's probably as good as me."

"Yeah, right." He rolls his eyes. "You're probably preposterously good after practicing for two years."  
_Preposterously. _Such and Erudite thing of him to say.

"Well, can you show me?" Caleb continues. "I'd like to learn how to do it."

I hesitate for a moment, but I can't find a reason why not, so I get up and look around my room. On the top of my dresser there's a tray with left over food from my breakfast this morning. I place the cheese in front and take a knife with me as I walk over to the other side of the room. Then I repeat the same motion I've been perfecting for two years, ignoring Caleb's sharp eyes watching my every move.

Inhale, position the knife. Exhale, throw. The knife spins in the air almost like in slow motion and hits the cheese right in the middle.

"Wow", Caleb says. "Can I try?"

He pulls the knife out of the cheese and walks over to me. I shrug and sit down on the floor as I watch him, leaning my head against the wall. He tries to copy my moves but he moves awkwardly, his arm moving outward in a as he pulls it forward to throw. The knife flies too far to the left and bounces against the dresser down on the floor.

"No, not like that!" I say, laughing.

"What do you mean, 'not like that'?" Caleb protests, picking the knife up. "I imitated you perfectly."

"You did not."

"Well, do it again, then." He hands me the knife.

I do it from where I am, sitting down; I inhale while lifting my arm, focus on the target- sorry, the cheese, and then I throw while exhaling. The door opens just as the knife hits the cheese at the same spot again, and I look over to see Tris standing in the doorway. Caleb continues to stare at the cheese in disbelief for a few seconds before looking at Tris.

"Tell me he's some kind of Dauntless prodigy", Caleb says to Tris. "Can you do this too?"

"With my right hand, maybe", Tris says. "But yes, Four is some kind of Dauntless prodigy. Can I ask why you're throwing knives at cheese?"

I look up, surprised by her use of my nickname. It doesn't sound right anymore. Four is the Dauntless who cares only about being brave, and who is good at it. Four is the Dauntless prodigy, not me. Not Tobias.

"Caleb came by to discuss something", I say to answer Tris's question. "And knife-throwing just came up somehow."

"As it so often does", she says sarcastically, but she smiles and as she does, it makes me feel light, almost happy. I can't look away from her, a warmth spreading through my body, and I see all kinds of things in her eyes; love, curiosity, humor, but still that sadness.

Caleb suddenly clears his throat, drawing my attention from Tris. He looks at me, then at Tris, and then back at me again.

"Anyway, I should be getting back to my room. I'm reading this book about the water-filtration systems", Caleb says. "The kid who gave it tome looked at me like I was crazy for wanting to tread it. I think it's supposed to be a repair manual, but it's fascinating." He hesitates. "Sorry. You probably think I'm crazy too."

"Not at all", I say, although it's not completely true. That book sounds incredibly boring. "Maybe you should read it too, Tris", I suggest with a smile, because I know she's nowhere near interested. "It sounds like something you might like."  
"I can loan it to you", Caleb says, voice hopeful.

"Maybe later", Tris says, although I can see that she would've said no if anyone else was asking, but she doesn't want to hurt her brother. Always so selfless.

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter, don't forget to (please) leave a review telling me what you think! :)**


	4. I Knew You Were Trouble

Tris glares at me after Caleb has left.

"Thanks for that. Now he's going to talk my ear off about water filtration and how it works", says Tris. "Though I guess I might prefer that to what he wants to talk to me about."

I lift my eyebrows. "Oh? And what's that? Aquaponics?

"Aqua-what?"

"It's one of the way they grow food here. You don't want to know."

The complicated ways of growing food at Amity makes even me wish I'd never known.

"You're right, I don't", Tris says. "What did he come to talk to you about?"

"You. I think it was the big-brother talk. 'Don't mess around with my sister' and all that."

I get up from my bed and move closer to her.

"What did you tell him?" Tris asks.

"I told him how we got together – that's how knife-throwing came up. And I told him I wasn't messing around."

I place my hands on her hips, gently pushing her back against the door and then I kiss her. She lets her arm slide beneath my t-shirt over my back, leaving a trail of heat on my skin. It feels like I can't get close enough to her and I have trouble breathing. Then, somewhere in the back of my dizzy mind, I remember that she must've a reason for coming to my room.

"This isn't what you came here for", I say, reluctantly pulling away as little as possible.

"No."

"What did you come for, then?"

"Who cares?" she says, her fingers tangling in my hair, pulling me closer.

We kiss again, but it doesn't feel as right as before, not when she had another reason for coming here. It might've been important.

It's hard, but I manage to pull away a little again. "Tris", I mumble.

"Okay, okay", she says, closing her eyes.

She sits down on my bed and I follow her. She starts telling me about how she followed my dad and Johanna and what she heard them talking about; the simulation attack and Marcus's theory about what the Erudite truly wanted from the Abnegation.

"Well, what do you think?" she asks as she finishes the story.

"I think," I say slowly, choosing my words carefully, "that it's Marcus trying to feel more important than he is."

"So… what?" says Tris. "You think he's just talking nonsense?"

"I think there probably is some information the Abnegation knew that Jeanine wanted to know, but I think he's exaggerating its importance. Trying to build up his own ego by making Johanna think he's got something she wants and he won't give it to her."

"I don't…" she hesitates for a moment, eyes thoughtful and she frowns. "I don't think you're right. He didn't sound like he was lying."

"You don't know him like I do", I say, my voice turning bitter as I think about all the lies I grew up with, everything he said to cover up why my face or arms were bruised. "He is an excellent liar."

She seems to think about this for a while. "Maybe you're right," she finally says, "but shouldn't we find out what's going on? Just to be sure?"

"I think it's more important that we deal with the situation at hand. Go back to the city. Find out what's going on there. Find a way to take Erudite down. Then maybe we can find out what Marcus was talking about, after this is all resolved. Okay?"

She nods, but I'm not one hundred percent sure that I've convinced her.

The next morning I'm on kitchen duty. The kitchen is small and crammed with people, which doesn't make anything easier. I try to take deep breaths as I scrub a plate clean but I keep imagining how the walls are closing in on me.

"Aren't you Tobias Eaton? Marcus's son?" a boy's voice next to me asks.

I throw a quick glance at him. He's an Amity, dressed in yellow and red clothes.

"That's none of your business", I reply, looking down at my hands as I reach for a glass.

"It kind of is", he says. "I've heard you're just a bunch of trouble. What are you doing here, anyways?"

"Oh, I don't know if you've heard," I say sarcastically, "but the Erudite just put every Dauntless in a simulation and made them attack the Abnegation. The Amity seemed like the best option to be left alone, but I'm not so sure anymore."

"Yeah? Well, I think we made the right choice." He glares at me. "It'll be hard, but this is the only way to prevent conflict, although you and that girlfriend of yours aren't really making anything easier. You're just troublemakers, I tell ya'."

Something about the way he says _girlfriend, _like it's a bad thing, makes a wave of anger course through me.

"Yeah, well, I've got another suggestion for you." I put down the glass and walk up to him, so close that he's forced to look at me.

"How about you mind your own business?" I say, my voice low and dangerous.

"Hey, I don't want any trouble, man", the boy says, putting his hands by his head and backing away from me. "I'm just curious, that's all."

I step back, turning to my sink. "Yeah? Well, some things are just… private."

He stays quiet for a while I try to focus on the scrambling of glass and metal instead of the shrinking room and wipe away some sweat from my forehead. The air is thick and hot and I can barely breathe.  
"You all right?" the boy next to me asks cautiously.

"I'm fine", I say, clenching my teeth together.

"You know, I thought a Dauntless like you would be much braver then to hide away in another faction." He frowns. "Come to think of it, that girl of yours doesn't seem like she belongs in Dauntless at all."

Something inside of me snaps. Hatred makes my vision go red at the edges.  
"Yeah? Well, you seem like you belong in Candor," I hiss, my voice echoing in the room, "because apparently you can't ever shut up." I take in a deep breath, trying to fight the urge to punch him in the face. "Don't ever talk about her again, you understand? Or about me, or my life."

My hands are shaking and I can't control them. The heat feels like a blanket wrapping around me and I can't breathe, the walls bending inward, moving toward me slowly. Why did this fear have to be one I can't get over?

"What's going on over here?" Someone shouts and I see a man with black hair and black beard come toward me, dressed in a yellow shirt. "No fighting in my kitchen. Get back to work." He must be the chef.

"I'm not sure he's going to be able to work", the boy next to me says. "Look's like he's about to pass out."

I've had enough from that boy. I turn around, my vision blurred with anger- or sweat, I can't really tell. I clench my hands into fist, lifting them like I'm about to throw a punch but my hands are shaking too much.

"Hey! Calm down!" the chef says, putting a hand on my lifted arm. "You're obviously not in the shape for working, you need to calm down. Get out of my kitchen, you're done for today."

I wipe my forehead with the back of my hand, shaking my head. "I'm fine, I can work."

"You're obviously not fine", he says, nodding toward my hands. "It's okay, Jeremy will cover your work."

"Hey!" the boy next to me protests. The chef glares at him, but I leave the room as fast as I can before he changes his mind. The air is cooler outside of the kitchen and I sink into a crouch leaning against the wall. I can finally breathe normally again. I never want to go back into that room.

**What do you think? As usual, please leave a review and tell me what you thought, it's what keeps me going. Also, I'll try to post a little more often.**


	5. When You Walked In

I close my eyes, waiting until I'm calm again, before I walk toward the dining hall. I'm starving. I search the room and immediately feel a littler better when I see Tris's blond, small figure. I approach them, sitting down next to Tris.

"What happened?" Tris asks. Apparently I must look as terrible as I feel.

"In their enthusiasm for conflict resolution," I say, "the Amity have apparently forgotten that meddling creates more conflict. If we stay here much longer, I am going to punch someone, and it's not going to be pretty."  
Caleb and might-as-well-be-his-girlfriend Susan raises their eyebrows and a couple of Amity next to us glare at me.

"You heard me", I say, annoyed by their innocence.

The effect of my words is what I was hoping for – they all look away, probably a little embarrassed about being caught staring.

"As I said, what happened?" Tris repeats.

"I'll tell you later", is my response, since I do not wish to attract any more hatful looks from the Amity when I start telling Tris about what happened with words that would probably become more and more violent.

That's when a hand lands on Tris's bad shoulder and her jaw clenches in pain. I stiffen because I know whom that hand belongs to.

"She got shot in that shoulder", I say, not really wanting to talk to him but at the same time not going to let him hurt her.

"My apologies", my father says and sits down on the other side of Tris.  
"What do you want?" Tris says. Her hostility toward him makes me feel a little better. At least she's got my back. I'm not alone anymore – Marcus cannot hurt me. Even though I know that I refuse to look at Marcus, to look into those cold eyes. I can't. Instead, I stare down at the table.

"Beatrice", Susan says in a low, scolding voice. "There's no need to-"  
"Susan, please", Tris's brother says, and I remember that he knows.

At least Susan listens to him.

"I asked you a question", Tris says to Marcus.

"I would like to discuss something with you. The other Abnegation and myself have discussed it and decided that we should not stay here", Marcus replies, voice tight with suppressed anger. "We believe that, given the inevitability of further conflict in our city, it would be selfish of us to stay here while what remains of our factions is inside that fence. We would like to request that you escort us."

No matter how I feel about my father, and no matter what painful memories is brought up when he speaks with that voice, like he's bottled up all of his anger and is about to explode, I have to admit that it sounds like a good plan. Just like even though Jeremy was very annoying, I have to admit that he was right about one thing. It isn't very Dauntless of us to hide away in Amity.  
Tris doesn't say anything for a few seconds, and then I feel her eyes on me, although I can't look up. I'm too afraid that I'll meet Marcus's grey, hard eyes instead of Tris's beautiful, bright ones.

"What do you think?" Tris asks me.

I take in a deep breath. No matter how much I'd like to get as far away from Marcus as possible, I've already made up my mind about what is the right choice here.

"I think we should leave the day after tomorrow", I say.

"Okay", Marcus says as stands. "Thank you."

Then he moves farther away from us to sit with the Abnegation. I feel my entire body relax as he leaves. Tris moves closer to me, taking my hand under the table. Although it is not much, it is comforting enough.

When we're finished eating Tris tells me that she's going for a walk. I would've offered to come with but something in her eyes tells me that she wants to be alone, the way she doesn't quite meet _my_ eyes makes me think she's up to something. But I don't ask any questions, because I trust her. If something is wrong she'll tell me when she's ready.

So I decide to head back to my room and maybe get some rest. It feels like I've been working the whole day although it is not even lunchtime yet. The claustrophobic kitchen and the meeting with my father took everything out of me.

On my way to the room I bump into Johanna Reyes.

"Tobias!" she says and smiles. "I'm so glad you're still here."

I just nod, unsure what to say.

"You should know," she continued, "that your father and I have been good friends for a long time and I would've offered you more protection here if I could. But, as you know, I'm not the leader of our faction, merely the mouthpiece. It is the people of Amity that decide."

"Yes, I… I know." _But I don't like it._

"Well, then." She offers me her hand. "Stay out of trouble."

_I'll try_, I think_, _shaking her hand.

I go to bed early that night. Shortly after I've fallen asleep, or what feels like shortly after, the door to my room creaked open. I squint against the light and see Tris standing in the doorway, looking a little unsecure.  
"C'mere", I mumble, moving back in the bed to give her room.

Only when she's coming toward me I notice what she was sleeping in, just a t-shirt too big for her, showing of her legs.

"Bed dream?" I ask her as she lies down.

She nods, but doesn't say anything.

"What happened?"

It must've been too horrible to talk about, because she just shakes her head. It pains me to see her hurt like this, even if it was just a bad dream. I place my palm on her cheek.

"We're all right, you know", I say, my voice soft. "You and me. Okay?"

She nods again.

"Nothing else is all right," I continue, "but we are."

"Tobias", she says, finally speaking. But she doesn't keep talking, instead, she kisses me.

Warmth spreads through my body and I let my hand slide from her cheek, down her side. She's so soft.

My breaths come faster as she wraps her leg around me. My body seems to know exactly what to do even though touching her makes my thoughts cloudy and I can't think straight.

My hands are suddenly on her back and I press her closer, feeling like she's too far away even though she's right here.

I kiss her on the cheek and down her neck until I feel my hands touching the bandage on her right shoulder. She stiffens, pulling back a little and dragging her t-shirt down again.

I suddenly feel empty and cold when her arms are not around me anymore. I know that I shouldn't feel like this; she told me she didn't want to move too fast, this shouldn't have been a surprise.

"Sorry", Tris says, her voice thick from choking back tears.

I find her cheek with my hand again and wipe a few tears away.

"I don't mean to be such a mess." Her voice shakes as she speaks. "I just feel so…"

She doesn't continue, but I still understand. When my mom died, I felt angry and frustrated because it was so unfair, at the same time as I was so sad and grieving.

"It's wrong", I say. "It doesn't matter if your parents are in a better place – they aren't here with you, and that's wrong, Tris. It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. And anyone who tells you it's okay is a liar."

She starts to cry again, and this time she doesn't hold back again. Her body shakes with sobs and I wrap my arms around her, holding her tight, letting her know that she's not alone. I hold her like that until she stops crying and calms down.  
"Sleep", I say then. "I'll fight the bad dreams off if they come to get you."

"With what?" She says, a small smile curling her lips.

"My bare hands, obviously."

She wraps her arms around me and we're both quiet. I don't know how long we lie there, but I let her start to fall asleep before saying what's been on my mind since she came to my room.

"I love you, Tris", I whisper.

I'm not sure if she's already asleep or if she heard me but didn't want to speak, but she doesn't say anything. I convince myself that the first option is she truth.


	6. The Faction of Good Moods

**I'm so sorry for not updating in a looong time! I've just been very busy during the summer and with school and stuff… I just haven't had time, but I do have a couple of chapters prepared now so I'll post them when I have time. I hope you enjoy! :)**

When I wake up early in the morning Tris is still asleep, but instead of trying to go back to sleep I decide to use the extra time to shave. I haven't done it in a while. I find an electric razor in the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror in my room.

It still feels weird sometimes, staring at my own reflection for a long time. It feels selfish. That's what Abnegation did to me, and I don't like it.

A movement in the mirror catches my eye and I see Tris sitting up in my bed.

"Good morning", I say. "How did you sleep?"

"Okay", she replies, getting out of bed. She walks up to me, putting her arms around me. Her touch makes me feel warm and light, and I put the razor away. We stand there for a while, both quiet. I let my hands slide over her fingers, feeling her soft skin against mine.

"I should go get ready", Tris finally says.

I think I remember her saying something about working in the laundry room today.

"I'll get you something to wear." She shouldn't have to walk around in a short t-shirt.

I shuffle through the clothes in my dresser that the Amity provided me with and find a pair of jeans shorts to give her.

She puts them on, gives me short kiss and then she leaves.

I finish shaving and head to the bathroom with a clean set of clothes. I take a long, warm shower and brush my teeth. Walking toward the dining hall for breakfast I notice some kind of commotion in the hallway. As I come closer I see that it's Tris and… Peter, fighting. My body freezes as I instantly remember Peter holding Tris over the chasm, although this time it's different. She's stronger, self-confident. She could injure him really bad if she wanted to.  
People dressed in all different kinds of colors tries to hold them apart, yelling at them to stop. Peter punches Tris in the stomach and she bends forward, but she recovers quickly and lifts her elbows as if to hit him in the face. I break out of the shock and jerk forward to stop them both but an Amity reaches Tris first, pulling her away from Peter. She fights the arms holding her back with a fierce look in her face, and I barely recognize her as the girl from last night.

"Tris, calm down!" I try to tell her.

"He has the hard drive!" she yells back at me. "He stole it from me! He has it!"

That must be what caused the fight.

I walk over to Peter lying on the ground and place a foot on Peter's chest to keep him from trying to fight me. I bend down and take the hard dive out of his pocket.

Looking at him, I feel old hatred coursing through me. "We won't be in a safe house forever, and this wasn't very smart of you", I say to Peter, my voice low. Then I turn toward Tris. "Not very smart of you, either. Do you want to get us kicked out?"

She scowls as the Amity man holding her starts to pull her away. She strains against him again.  
"What do you think you're doing?" She yells. "Let go of me!"

"You violated the terms of our peace agreement", the Amity man replies calmly. "We must follow protocol."

"Just go", I say. "You need to cool down."

Luckily, no one protests against that and she listens to me, letting the Amity take her down the hallway.

The hallway is crowded with people shouting, running, talking. I look around, disoriented, and I suddenly feel suffocated by all the people, like I've got no space to breathe. My thoughts are racing and I don't know where to go, but I know I need to get out. I hurry toward the nearest exit and can't relax until I'm out in the orchard, breathing in the fresh air and smelling dirt and plants. I let my feet wander to wherever they want, walking for a long time, just thinking. I end up sitting down next to a tree, the branches shielding me from the hot sun. I lean my head back, closing my eyes.

Will we be kicked out after this? If so, where will we go? Back to the city, like Marcus said? But to which faction? Should we try to find out what happened to the rest of the Dauntless?

I've almost fallen asleep when I hear someone call out my name, or my nick name.  
"Four!" It is Tris's voice, getting closer. "Four! Where are you?"

"Tris?" I say, a little confused over why she was calling my Four. I get up.

She giggles as she sees me, ducking under a branch to get to her. She starts to run toward me but as she gets close she lurches to the side and almost falls. I reach out for her, my hand touching her waist so she doesn't fall. She looks up and puts her face close to mine.

"What did they-" I try to say but she kisses me, stopping me from talking.  
I kiss her back but break away pretty quickly, because she's clearly not herself.

"Tris, what did they do to you? You're acting like a lunatic."

"That's not very nice of you to say", she says, voice light. "They put me in a good mood, that's all. And now I really want to kiss you, so if you could just relax-"

"I'm not going to kiss you", I interrupt her. "I'm going to figure out what's going on."

She seems to be thinking about that for a moment, but then she breaks into a big smile.

"That's why you like me!" she says, sounding delighted. "Because you're not very nice either! It makes so much more sense now."

I roll my eyes. "Come on. We're going to see Johanna."

"I like you, too", Tris says.

"That's encouraging", I say. "Come on."

She starts to stumble forward next to me in a very slow pace, giggling.

"Oh, for God's sake. I'll just carry you."

I put one arm under her knees and the other behind her back, lifting her up. She puts her arms around my neck and kisses me on the cheek.  
I carry her all the way to Johanna's office. I'm not sure I like this new Tris at all, all girly and giggly, swinging her feet up and down as I walk. I want the strong, brave and smart Tris back. She's the one I fell in love with.

Where is she, and what the hell did they do to her?

Johanna's office has one desk and several bookshelves along the walls of the room.

She looks up as we enter, a surprised look on her face.

"You really shouldn't cover up your scar", Tris says, unaware of the problem. "You look prettier with your hair out of your face."

I put Tris down on the floor and she starts laughing out of nowhere, but I ignore her.

"What did you do to her?" I ask Johanna, annoyed. "What in God's name did you do?"

"I…" Johanna looks stunned, frowning at Tris. "They must have given her too much. She's very small; they probably didn't take her height and weight into account."

"They must have given her too much of what?" I insist.

"You have a nice voice", Tris interrupts.

"Tris, please be quiet", I say.

"The peace serum," Johanna replies. "In small doses, it has a mild, calming effect and improves the mood. The only side effect is some slight dizziness. We administer it to members of our community who have trouble keeping the peace."

"I'm not an idiot", I say with a snort. "Every member of your community has trouble keeping the peace, because they're all human. You probably dump it into the water supply."

Johanna's expression doesn't change the slightest at my words; it remains calm. She takes a while to reply, folding her hands and choosing her words.

"Clearly you know that is not the case, or this conflict would not have occurred. But whatever we agree to do here, we do together, as a faction. If I could give the serum to everyone in this city, I would. You would certainly not be in the situation you are in now if I had."

"Oh, definitely", I say sarcastically. "Drugging the entire population is the best solution to our problem. Great plan."  
"Sarcasm is not kind, Four", Johanna says calmly. "Now, I am sorry about the mistake in giving too much to Tris, I really am. But she violated the terms of our agreement, and I'm afraid that you might not be able to stay here much longer as a result. The conflict between her and the boy – Peter – is not something we can forget."

_Neither can I._

"Don't worry. We intend to leave as soon as humanly possible", I say.  
"Good." Johanna smiles. "Peace between Amity and Dauntless can only happen when we maintain our distance from each other."  
"That explains a lot", I say, anger boiling inside of me.

"Excuse me? What are you insinuating?"

"It explains why, under a pretense of neutrality - as if such a thing is possible! – you have left us to die at the hands of the Erudite."

Johanna sighs, looking away from me.

"The Amity wouldn't do something like that", Tris protests in a high-pitched voice. "That's mean."

"It is for the sake of peace that we remain uninvolved-" Johanna starts, but I interrupt her.

"Peace. Yes, I'm sure it will be very peaceful when we are all either dead or cowering in submission under the threat of mind control or stuck in an endless simulation.

Johanna grimaces as she says: "The decision was not mine to make. If it was, perhaps we would be having a different conversation right now."  
"Are you saying you disagree with them?" I ask.

"I am saying, that it isn't my place to disagree with my faction publicly, but I might, in the privacy of my own heart."

God. Doesn't anyone get to have their own opinion in this faction?

"Tris and I will be gone in two days. I hope your faction doesn't change their decision to make this compound a safe house."

"Our decisions are not easily unmade", Johanna says. "What about Peter?"  
"You'll have to del with him separately, because he won't be coming with us."  
I take Tris's hand and she rises.

"Four", Johanna says. "If you and your friends would like to remain… untouched by our serum, you might want to avoid the bread."

"Thanks", I say bitterly, a sour taste in my mouth.

Tris is skipping, jumping and tripping all the way back to her room, where I put her to await the serum wearing off.


	7. Death or Life

**I'm so sorry for not updating in a looong time! I've just, like I've said several times, been very busy during the summer and with school and stuff… I just haven't had time and I don't think I'll be posting regularly, it'll come every now and then… but I do have a couple of chapters prepared now so I'll post them when I have time. I hope you enjoy! :)**

When I wake up early in the morning Tris is still asleep, but instead of trying to go back to sleep I decide to use the extra time to shave. I haven't done it in a while. I find an electric razor in the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror in my room.

It still feels weird sometimes, staring at my own reflection for a long time. It feels selfish. That's what Abnegation did to me, and I don't like it.

A movement in the mirror catches my eye and I see Tris sitting up in my bed.

"Good morning", I say. "How did you sleep?"

"Okay", she replies, getting out of bed. She walks up to me, putting her arms around me. Her touch makes me feel warm and light, and I put the razor away. We stand there for a while, both quiet. I let my hands slide over her fingers, feeling her soft skin against mine.

"I should go get ready", Tris finally says.

I think I remember her saying something about working in the laundry room today.

"I'll get you something to wear." She shouldn't have to walk around in a short t-shirt.

I shuffle through the clothes in my dresser that the Amity provided me with and find a pair of jeans shorts to give her.

She puts them on, gives me short kiss and then she leaves.

I finish shaving and head to the bathroom with a clean set of clothes. I take a long, warm shower and brush my teeth. Walking toward the dining hall for breakfast I notice some kind of commotion in the hallway. As I come closer I see that it's Tris and… Peter, fighting. My body freezes as I instantly remember Peter holding Tris over the chasm, although this time it's different. She's stronger, self-confident. She could injure him really bad if she wanted to.  
People dressed in all different kinds of colors tries to hold them apart, yelling at them to stop. Peter punches Tris in the stomach and she bends forward, but she recovers quickly and lifts her elbows as if to hit him in the face. I break out of the shock and jerk forward to stop them both but an Amity reaches Tris first, pulling her away from Peter. She fights the arms holding her back with a fierce look in her face, and I barely recognize her as the girl from last night.

"Tris, calm down!" I try to tell her.

"He has the hard drive!" she yells back at me. "He stole it from me! He has it!"

That must be what caused the fight.

I walk over to Peter lying on the ground and place a foot on Peter's chest to keep him from trying to fight me. I bend down and take the hard dive out of his pocket.

Looking at him, I feel old hatred coursing through me. "We won't be in a safe house forever, and this wasn't very smart of you", I say to Peter, my voice low. Then I turn toward Tris. "Not very smart of you, either. Do you want to get us kicked out?"

She scowls as the Amity man holding her starts to pull her away. She strains against him again.  
"What do you think you're doing?" She yells. "Let go of me!"

"You violated the terms of our peace agreement", the Amity man replies calmly. "We must follow protocol."

"Just go", I say. "You need to cool down."

Luckily, no one protests against that and she listens to me, letting the Amity take her down the hallway.

The hallway is crowded with people shouting, running, talking. I look around, disoriented, and I suddenly feel suffocated by all the people, like I've got no space to breathe. My thoughts are racing and I don't know where to go, but I know I need to get out. I hurry toward the nearest exit and can't relax until I'm out in the orchard, breathing in the fresh air and smelling dirt and plants. I let my feet wander to wherever they want, walking for a long time, just thinking. I end up sitting down next to a tree, the branches shielding me from the hot sun. I lean my head back, closing my eyes.

Will we be kicked out after this? If so, where will we go? Back to the city, like Marcus said? But to what faction? Should we try to find out what happened to the rest of the Dauntless?

I've almost fallen asleep when I hear someone call out my name, or my nick name.  
"Four!" It is Tris's voice, getting closer. "Four! Where are you?"

"Tris?" I say, a little confused over why she was calling my Four. I get up.

She giggles as she sees me, ducking under a branch to get to her. She starts to run toward me but as she gets close she lurches to the side and almost falls. I reach out for her, my hand touching her waist so she doesn't fall. She looks up and puts her face close to mine.

"What did they-" I try to say but she kisses me, stopping me from talking.  
I kiss her back but break away pretty quickly, because she's clearly not herself.

"Tris, what did they do to you? You're acting like a lunatic."

"That's not very nice of you to say", she says, voice light. "They put me in a good mood, that's all. And now I really want to kiss you, so if you could just relax-"

"I'm not going to kiss you", I interrupt her. "I'm going to figure out what's going on."

She seems to be thinking about that for a moment, but then she breaks into a big smile.

"That's why you like me!" she says, sounding delighted. "Because you're not very nice either! It makes so much more sense now."

I roll my eyes. "Come on. We're going to see Johanna."

"I like you, too", Tris says.

"That's encouraging", I say. "Come on."

She starts to stumble forward next to me in a very slow pace, giggling.

"Oh, for God's sake. I'll just carry you."

I put one arm under her knees and the other behind her back, lifting her up. She puts her arms around my neck and kisses me on the cheek.  
I carry her all the way to Johanna's office. I'm not sure I like this new Tris at all, all girly and giggly, swinging her feet up and down as I walk. I want the strong, brave and smart Tris back. She's the one I fell in love with.

Where is she, and what the hell did they do to her?

Johanna's office has one desk and several bookshelves along the walls of the room.

She looks up as we enter, a surprised look on her face.

"You really shouldn't cover up your scar", Tris says, unaware of the problem. "You look prettier with your hair out of your face."

I put Tris down on the floor and she starts laughing out of nowhere, but I ignore her.

"What did you do to her?" I ask Johanna, annoyed. "What in God's name did you do?"

"I…" Johanna looks stunned, frowning at Tris. "They must have given her too much. She's very small; they probably didn't take her height and weight into account."

"They must have given her too much of what?" I insist.

"You have a nice voice", Tris interrupts.

"Tris, please be quiet", I say.

"The peace serum," Johanna replies. "In small doses, it has a mild, calming effect and improves the mood. The only side effect is some slight dizziness. We administer it to members of our community who have trouble keeping the peace."

"I'm not an idiot", I say with a snort. "Every member of your community has trouble keeping the peace, because they're all human. You probably dump it into the water supply."

Johanna's expression doesn't change the slightest at my words; it remains calm. She takes a while to reply, folding her hands and choosing her words.

"Clearly you know that is not the case, or this conflict would not have occurred. But whatever we agree to do here, we do together, as a faction. If I could give the serum to everyone in this city, I would. You would certainly not be in the situation you are in now if I had."

"Oh, definitely", I say sarcastically. "Drugging the entire population is the best solution to our problem. Great plan."  
"Sarcasm is not kind, Four", Johanna says calmly. "Now, I am sorry about the mistake in giving too much to Tris, I really am. But she violated the terms of our agreement, and I'm afraid that you might not be able to stay here much longer as a result. The conflict between her and the boy – Peter – is not something we can forget."

_Neither can I._

"Don't worry. We intend to leave as soon as humanly possible", I say.  
"Good." Johanna smiles. "Peace between Amity and Dauntless can only happen when we maintain our distance from each other."  
"That explains a lot", I say, anger boiling inside of me.

"Excuse me? What are you insinuating?"

"It explains why, under a pretense of neutrality - as if such a thing is possible! – you have left us to die at the hands of the Erudite."

Johanna sighs, looking away from me.

"The Amity wouldn't do something like that", Tris protests in a high-pitched voice. "That's mean."

"It is for the sake of peace that we remain uninvolved-" Johanna starts, but I interrupt her.

"Peace. Yes, I'm sure it will be very peaceful when we are all either dead or cowering in submission under the threat of mind control or stuck in an endless simulation.

Johanna grimaces as she says: "The decision was not mine to make. If it was, perhaps we would be having a different conversation right now."  
"Are you saying you disagree with them?" I ask.

"I am saying, that it isn't my place to disagree with my faction publicly, but I might, in the privacy of my own heart."

God. Doesn't anyone get to have their own opinion in this faction?

"Tris and I will be gone in two days. I hope your faction doesn't change their decision to make this compound a safe house."

"Our decisions are not easily unmade", Johanna says. "What about Peter?"  
"You'll have to del with him separately, because he won't be coming with us."  
I take Tris's hand and she rises.

"Four", Johanna says. "If you and your friends would like to remain… untouched by our serum, you might want to avoid the bread."

"Thanks", I say bitterly, a sour taste in my mouth.

Tris is skipping, jumping and tripping all the way back to her room, where I put her to await the serum wearing off.


	8. Frozen and Can't Breathe

When I check on Tris the third hour after we've returned from Johanna's office she's laying on the floor making clicking noises with her tongue as she made a butterfly with her hands.

"Four!" she exclaimed as she heard the door creak open. "Look! Butterfly!"

"Yeah", I say, sitting down next to her. "Yeah, I see."

She smiles expectantly at me for a while, and then frowns. "What sound does butterflies make?"

"I… I don't know, actually."

So she starts to try out different sounds with her mouth and that's when I leave again.

It isn't until two hours later, on the fifth hour that she's back to normal. She sits on her bed as I open the door, staring at the wall.

"Thank God", I breathe, leaning my forehead against the cold door. "I was beginning to think it would never wear off and I would have to leave you here to… smell flowers, or whatever you wanted to do while you were on that stuff."

"I'll kill them", Tris says. "I will kill them."  
"Don't bother. We're leaving soon anyway", I say, closing the door and taking out the hard drive from my pocket. "I thought we could hide this behind your dresser."  
"That's where it was before", she protests.

"Yeah, and that's why Peter won't look for it here again."

I pull the dresser out a few centimeters from the wall, just enough to squeeze the hard drive behind it.

"Why couldn't I fight the peace serum?" Tris asks. "If my brain is weird enough o resist the simulation serum, why not this one?"

"I don't know, really", I say as I sit down next to her. "Maybe in order to fight off a serum, you have to want to."

"Well, obviously I wanted to", she says, but then her eyes turn hesitant. I understand why.

"Sometimes people just want to be happy, even if it's not real", I say softly.

She's quiet for a second, before saying that I might be right.

"Are you conceding?" I say, pretending to be surprised. "Seems like that serum did you some good after all…"

Take that back", she says, shoving me hard. "Take it back now."

"Okay, okay!" I say, lifting my hands to show surrender. "It's just… I'm not very nice either, you know. That's why I like you so-"

"Out!" Tris points at the door, glaring at me.

I laugh and kiss her on the cheek before I do as she told me.

At dinner I sit with Peter, Caleb and Susan. Tris isn't here, but I'm guessing she's too tired.

I purposely avoid looking at Peter as I eat and concentrate on my food.

"So when are you and Tris leaving, Tobias?" Caleb asks me.

I look up and shrug. "In about two days, I think."

"Oh. Well, if it's alright, Susan and I are coming with you."

"Actually", Susan says, voice soft. "I was planning on staying here. You can leave if you want to though, of course."

"What? I thought you said-"

Caleb is interrupted by Tris, running toward us. Her eyes are wide with fear and I touch her shoulder, trying to comfort her.

"Erudite", she blurts out, trying to catch her breath.

My heartbeat's loud in my ears. "Coming here?"

She nods.

"Do we have time to run?" I ask.

The other Abnegation sitting close to us are now coming up to us, listening carefully. One of them is my father.

"Why do we need to run?" Susan looks confused. "The Amity established this place as a safe house. No conflict allowed."

"The Amity will have trouble enforcing that policy", Marcus says. "How do you stop conflict without conflict?"

Susan nods, as if saying that he's got a point.

"But we can't leave", Peter protests. "We don't have time. They'll see us."

"Tris has a gun. We can try to fight our way out", I suggest.

I've already started walking toward our rooms when Tris says; "Wait."

I turn around to look at her.

"I have an idea", she says. "Disguises. The Erudite don't know for sure that we're still here. We can pretend to be Amity."

"Those of us who aren't dressed like the Amity should go to the dormitories, then", says my father. "The rest of you, put your hair down; try to mimic their behavior."

We leave toward our bedrooms, Tris getting her gun and the Abnegation in grey changing to yellow and red.

I close the door to my room behind me and hurry toward my dresser. I make sure to choose a shirt with collar, and the only one I could find was in a horrible red color. I change as fast as I can and switch to a pair of jeans before leaving my room. I walk out to the hallway, through a door leading outside and throw the old Abnegation clothes in a trash bin.

"Do you think the Amity will lie for us?" Tris says from behind me, standing in the doorway.

"To prevent conflict? Absolutely."

Her eyes slip from my face down to my shirt.

"Nice shirt", she says.

I make a face. "It was the only thing that covered up the neck tattoo, okay?"

She smiles a little. At that moment, the five Erudite cars arrive.

Tris backs into the hallway and I focus hard on the latch on the trash bin, like it's way to complicated for me.  
About five blue-dressed Erudite step out of the cars, and the rest are Dauntless. Blue strips of fabric around their arms show their allegiance to the Erudite.

I take Tris's hand and we walk back to the dormitory hallway.

"I didn't think our faction would be that stupid", I say. You have the gun, right?"  
"Yes", she replies. "But there's no guarantee I can fire it with any accuracy with my left hand."

"You should work on that." Right now it seemed inevitable that there'd come a time where you might need your left hand to do the work for your right. We never know what will happen, what injuries we might suffer.

"I will, if we live", Tris says, her voice shaking.

I let my hands slide down her arms to comfort her. "Just bounce a little when you walk," I suggest while placing a kiss on her forehead, "and pretend you're afraid of their guns," I continue with a kiss between her eyebrows, "and act like the shrinking violet you could never be" – I place a kiss on her cheek – "and you'll be fine."

"Okay", she says, pulling my shirt down to kiss me.

Then a bell signals that everyone must gather in the dining hall for a meeting. We blend in among a group of Abnegation dressed in the Amity colors as we walk. I see Tris, walking a few feet in front of me, letting Susan's hair down so that it looks more Amity and advising an Abnegation woman to tell her kids to play tag, so that they don't seem so Stiff.

As we reach the dining hall I see two Dauntless traitors guarding the door. I try to look relaxed as I walk past the, my steps light as if I don't have a problem in the world.

A few rows next to me in the group I see Tris and Susan, laughing at some pretend joke.

I sit down by a table and Tris sits in front of me, on the opposite side of the table. It feels nice to always have her in sight, and to be able to look at her when this whole thing freaks me out. She makes me strong. And I need that in this moment, when Erudite or one of the Dauntless traitors might kill us anytime – maybe someone I used to know will pull the trigger.

I hear a loud banging on wood to get everyone's attention and Johanna speaks up, standing next to an Erudite woman in blue.

"Our Erudite and Dauntless friends are looking for some people", says Johanna, her voice and expression calm. "Several members of Abnegation, three members of Dauntless, and a former Erudite initiate. In the interest of full cooperation, I told them that the people they were looking for were, in fact, here," my heart skips a beat at her words – _were_? - _"_but have since moved on. They would like permission to search the premises, which means we have to vote. Does anyone object to a search?"

Nobody objects, even though I'm sure some people would've if the look on Johanna's face didn't tell them otherwise.

Johanna nods to the Erudite woman, who says to a group of Dauntless traitors: "Three of you stick around. The rest of you, search all the buildings and report back if you find anything. Go."

Betrayal wells up in me, making my hands into fists without me telling them to. How could my faction be so stupid, how can they be loyal to the faction that enslaved them and forced them to start a war on Abnegation?

I'm confident that I got rid of everything that could link me to Dauntless or Abnegation, although that doesn't seem to matter because one of the three Dauntless guards are walking toward me, her eyes locked on my back.  
"Your hair is pretty short for an Amity", she says to me.

"It's hot", I reply, but I do it too fast, my voice too sharp from betrayal.

I feel her finger hooking around the collar of my shirt and pulling it back, revealing my tattoo.  
I think fast. If I do nothing, they'll know I'm Dauntless, capture me and maybe Tris too, if they've seen us together. But if I attack, the rest will still come after me and we'll have to run, although the attack may cause a tumult distracting enough for us to be able to escape. So that's what I do.

I twist around, grabbing her wrist before she's able to react and yank her down toward me. She falls, her forehead smacking against the edge of the table.

That's when the other Dauntless guards notice what's going on. One of them fires at me and I duck automatically behind the table. I need protection from the bullets, so I pull the Dauntless female guard and shield my body with hers as I take her gun and fire over her shoulder at the guards.

That's when I notice Tris. Everyone in the room takes cover from the bullets while she's still sitting at the table, eyes wide from fear or shock, I can't tell. But I would've thought she, if anyone, would be able to react properly and help me, but she doesn't. She just sits there, staring.

"Tris!" I call out, trying to get her attention. "A little help here?"

She blinks like she's just woken up from sleep, and reaches for her gun. At the last moment, she freezes, looking at the end of here table where a Dauntless guard stands, his gun aimed at her head. My body freezes. _No! _I think. _No, Tris, you have to move, or shoot him, just do something, please! Now!_

But she doesn't move.

**Hope you guys liked this chapter, please leave a review telling me if you did, it keeps me motivated to keep posting and reminds me to update! Love y'all. **


	9. Secrets and Lies

That's when Caleb lunges forward, grabbing Tris's gun. He hasn't gone through Dauntless initiation or probably ever held a gun before the simulation attack, so his aiming is bad, but in the seconds he's got before the Dauntless man will fire at Tris he still manages to hit the man in the leg.

My body reacts automatically and I aim at the Dauntless man and fire with my exhale, the bullet hitting him in the head, and he's no longer a threat.

I scan the room quickly and my eyes lock on the Erudite woman, her mouth open like she's about to hand out orders.

"Say another word", I say, aiming at her, "and I'll shoot."

Then I speak to the rest of the room. "Whoever's with us should start running."

Almost every Abnegation in the room gets up and head toward the door. Caleb pulls Tris up from the bench and in that moment of distraction when I looked away from the Erudite woman, I see her in my peripheral vision, pulling out a gun. She aims it toward Peter. Tris reacts before me this time and throws herself at Peter, knocking him to the ground. The bullet hits the wall where Peter were standing just a second ago.

"Put the gun down", I say, once again aiming at the Erudite woman. "I have very good aim, and I'm betting that you don't."

The Erudite woman stares at me for a while, clearly debating if what I'm saying is true. My heartbeat's loud in my ear as I stare back, my finger moving toward the trigger.

Finally, the Erudite woman puts her gun down, holding her hands up in a surrendering gesture. Peter and Tris hurry out the door and I follow them, not shifting my focus or aim off the Erudite woman. As soon as we're out of the dining hall we start to run.

We run through the orchard and I have to watch carefully where I put my feet so I don't trip over the big roots of the trees, but it's hard to see in the dark. The air is cool and damp like it's just been raining or is about to start.

I force myself to run faster than I ever have as the sound of car engines reaches my ear. I reach out for Tris's hand; I don't want to loose her among the trees.

As the orchard ends a cornfield takes it's place. I can't see where I'm running anymore, the corn plants are growing too closely, the leaves cutting me was I run through them.

"Split up!" I hear someone yell.

I let go of Tris's hand so that we can both run faster when gunshots goes off. People are screaming but I do not stop.  
At last we reach the fence. I slide my hands against it, feeling for the hole I know is there. I finally find it and pull the chains away, letting Tris, Caleb and Susan go through first. Then I go through and let go of the chain links, covering the hole up again.  
"Where are the others?" Susan whispers.

"Gone", says Tris.

Susan starts to sob, but I can't focus on the deaths right now. The important thing is that we get out of here.

I pull Tris closer to me and we walk. We chose to walk along the train tracks instead of the road where the Erudite cars drove, although it would take them a while to drive to the gate in the fence.

"I have to… stop…" Susan says after a few minutes of walking.

She sinks to the ground as we stop and Caleb sits down next to her, his hand patting her on the back as she cries. I try to ignore her. We do not know for sure that the rest of the Abnegation are dead. Instead of thinking about that, I turn toward Tris.

"What was that, Tris?" I ask her.

"What?" she says quietly.

"You froze! Someone was about to kill you and you just sat there!" The terrible thought of her being dead fuels my anger, making me yell. "I thought I could rely on you at least to save your own life!"

"Hey!" Caleb shouts at me. "Give her a break, all right?"

"No", I say. "She doesn't need a break." I look at her again, her bright, blank eyes making me soften inside. "What happened?"

She clears her throat before answering. "I panicked. It won't happen again."

I lift my eyebrows. It was pretty clear that she panicked, but I don't know why. She's been aimed at with a gun before, once by me, and she didn't panic then. She's strong; she always knows what to do. There must be another reason, something to explain why she suddenly panicked when she was in danger.

"It won't", Tris repeats.

"Okay", I say. Maybe I'm just making a big deal out of nothing. "We have to get somewhere safe. They'll regroup and start looking for us."

"You think they care that much about us?" says Tris.

"Us, yes", I reply. "We were probably the only ones they were really after, apart from Marcus, who is most likely dead."

I'm not sure how I feel about my father possibly being dead. I'm happy about him not being able to hurt me anymore, but at the same time, I'm sad about the fact that I have no family at all left. At least before I had a family, even if it was a bad one.

"Tobias…" Tris says, but doesn't continue.

I turn away from her. "Time to go."

We follow the train tracks back to the city. Tris and I walk in front of Caleb and Susan, me balancing on the rail. Nobody says anything, but I flinch as soon as I hear any noise, afraid that it'll be the sound of car engines or gunshots. Suddenly I feel a small vibration in the rails below me and Tris bends down, putting her hands on the rail.

"It's coming", she says, getting up slowly. "I think we should get on."

"Even if it's run by the Erudite?" Caleb asks.

"If the Erudite were running the train," I say, "they would have taken it to the Amity compound to look for us. I think it's worth the risk. We'll be able to hide in the city. Here we're just waiting for them to find us."

So we get off the tracks, watching the train coming closer and closer, until the first car passes us and we start running along side the train. Susan jumps into the first car with help from Caleb who jumps in next, followed by Tris. She doesn't jump far enough, her legs hanging outside of the train car, but Caleb helps her in and I follow, gripping the handle and pulling myself in.

I expected the car to be pretty much empty, but it's crammed with people, dark shadows on the floor. I suddenly realize almost each and every one of them is holding some kind of weapon, dressed in multiple colors; clothes from multiple factions.

_The factionless. _

One of them aims a gun at me. He doesn't look any older than 16 and he's got an eye patch. That's when I recognize him. Edward, who left Dauntless initiation and became factionless when Peter stabbed him in the eye with a butter-knife.

"I've never seen the Amity armed before", says a factionless woman to his left, holding a knife.  
"They aren't Amity", Edward replies. "They're Dauntless."

Yeah, he'd know.

"Hello, Edward", says Tris.

"Tris." He nods at her, still pointing the gun at me.

"Whatever you are, you'll have to get off this train if you want to stay alive", the woman says.

"Please." Tears start running down Susan's cheeks as she speaks. "We've been running… and the rest of them are dead and I don't… I don't think I can keep going, I…"  
She buries her face in her hands, sobbing.

"We're running from the Erudite", Caleb says. "If we get off, it will be easier or them to find us. So we would appreciate it if you let us ride into the city with you."  
"Yeah?" says Edward. "What have you ever done for us?"  
"I helped you when no one else would", Tris says. "Remember?"

"You, maybe. But the others? Not so much."  
I desperately try to figure out something that will help us here, and I remember how must of them get their food. From the Abnegation. And my father is- was, their leader.

"My name is Tobias Eaton", I say. "I don't think you want to push me off this train."

"Eaton? Really?" Edward says, lowering his gun. "I have to admit, I did not see that coming. Fine, you can come. But when we get to the city, you've got to come with us."

The factionless lower their weapons.

"We know someone who's been looking for you, Tobias Eaton." Edward smiles a little.

I can't tell if it's a mean smile or if it's a happy smile, but I don't really care. I go sit down with Tris by the edge of the train car.

"Do you know who it is?" says Tris

I nod.  
"Who, then?"  
"It's hard to explain", I say. "I have a lot to tell you."  
She leans her head against my shoulder. "Yeah. So do I."

I wonder what she had to tell me, because I didn't even know she kept anything from me. But I don't think anything is worse then what I have to tell her.

What I've known for almost two years, but haven't told anyone. That my mother is still alive.


	10. The Faction of the Factionless

We ride the train with the factionless for a long time, and when they tell us to get off we're in the factionless part of the city, close to the Abnegation sector.

When it's time to jump off the train, Susan hesitates.

"What if we get hurt?" she whimpers.

"We'll jump together", Tris says comforting, grabbing her hand. "You and me. I've done this a dozen times and never got hurt."

When Susan nods, Tris counts to three and then pulls Susan off with her as we all jumps. I land on my feet and so does Tris, although having a little trouble with keeping Susan from falling over. We keep moving forward, Susan walking next to Caleb. I hurry my steps to catch up to Tris.

"It's been a while since I checked that shoulder", I say, gently touching her shoulder as a reminder. "How is it?"

"Okay", she replies. "I brought the pain medicine, luckily. I don't think I'm letting it heal very well. I keep using my arm or landing on it."

"There will be plenty of time for healing once all this is over."

"Yeah", she says.

Neither of us speaks the words that we must both be thinking of; _If we're still alive by then._

I glance around to see if Edward or any factionless is close by, and then I fish up a small pocket knife from my jeans pocket and hand it to her- for protection.

"Here", I say. "Just in case."

She takes it from my hand, understanding in her eyes, and puts it in her back pocket, looking slightly unsettled.

We follow the factionless through a long alleyway, stopping by an old-looking building made of brick where Edward pushes open a metal, heavy-looking door. It's dark inside, the only light source coming from flickering lanterns spread out through the building. As we follow the factionless further into the building, several pairs of gleaming eyes watch us – eyes of children, women and men all gathered like they belong to their own kind of faction.

"Come on." Edward's voice pulls me back to reality. "She's back here."

_She. _That means I was right about whom I was going to meet- and this meeting wasn't going to be pretty.

We walk for a bit in the dark silence, no one saying anything, the only sound coming from our footsteps.

"What's going on here? Why are you all together like this?" Tris suddenly asks.

"You thought they- we – were all split up. Well, they were, for a while. Too hungry to do much of anything except look for food", Edward replies. "But then the Stiffs started giving them food, clothes, tools, everything. And they got stronger, and waited. They were like that when I found them, and they welcomed me."

Unlike the Dauntless had.

As we get closer and closer to where Edward pointed out that she was waiting, I grow more and more nervous, more absent from what's happening around me.

I haven't met _her_ in over two years, and I still haven't quite gotten over the fact that she left me with my father, knowing what he was doing to me- to us. No matter what happened here I knew someone was bound to get hurt, whether it be her, me, or Tris.

_I should've told her earlier. Why on earth didn't I tell her?_

Edward knocks on another steel door, and as we wait Caleb speaks up.

"Wait, you said they were waiting? What were they waiting for, exactly?"

"For the world to fall apart. And now it has." Edwards voice is neutral as he speaks, not revealing anything about what he feels concerning that.

The metal door opens without so much as creek, a woman with a dull-looking appearance studying us.

"Strays?" she asks, voice uninterested.

"Not hardly, Therese. This one's Tobias Eaton." Edward gestures back at me.

Therese's eyes fall briefly on me, before nodding in agreement.

"He certainly is", she confirms. "Hold on."

The door is shut behind her and I swallow hard as if that would get rid of the nervousity.

"You know who it is, don't you?" Caleb asks me.

"Caleb, please shut up." I don't really need him to remind me of her and what's about to happen, and for once, he actually listens to me.

Therese opens the door for us and we enter, walking through darkness, Tris next to me, her hand in mine. Machines are lined up in the room against the walls, and among them stand a table. And behind that, I see her, looking just as she did two years ago. Even though I knew she was still alive, seeing her again is shocking.

"Evelyn", I say, not quite able to stop my voice from shaking.

Somewhere in the back of my head I notice Tris's grasp around my hand faltering.

"Hello", she greets me. "You look older.

"Yes, well. The passage of time tends to do that to a person." That earns me a smile.

"So you've finally come-"

"Not for the reason you think", I say quickly, remembering our last meeting. "We were running from Erudite, and the only chance of escape we had required me to tell your poorly armed lackeys my name." I'm suddenly aware of the sharp edge of sarcasm in my voice, not even realizing that I was upset.

"I see." That smile is still plastered across her face, annoying me without any reason. "Introduce me to your fellow refugees, then."  
Her sharp eyes on Tris's and my hand make me uncomfortable, so I let go. "This is Tris prior. Her brother, Caleb." I gesture toward them. "And their friend Susan Black."

"Prior. I know of several Priors, but none of them are named Tris." My mother's eyes turn thoughtful. "Beatrice, however…"

"Well, I know of several living Eatons, but none of them are named Evelyn", Tris retorts. A pang of guilt squeezes my heart. No way could I have avoided her finding out about my mother being alive, but now she also knew that I'd known about it. I should've told her sooner.

"Evelyn Johnson is the name I prefer", Evelyn says. "Particularly among a pack of Abnegation."  
"Tris is the name I prefer. And we're not Abnegation. Not all of us, anyway."

My mother meets my eyes, a sarcastic tone in her voice as she speaks. "Interesting friends you've made."

"Those are population counts?" Caleb suddenly asks. He's noticed something I haven't, a bunch of charts and maps on the table behind her. "And… what? Factionless safe houses?" He points at some text on the map that I can't read in the dark. "I mean, these places, on the map? They're safe houses, like this one, right?"

"That's a lot of questions. For security purposes, I will not answer any of them", she replies, smoothly avoiding the subject. "Anyway, it is time for dinner."

**And that's where I have to end this episode off! **

**Two chapters in two days? What is this sorcery?!**

**Just kidding. Anyway, I started posting again. Hope you like it and that my writing skills hasn't gotten that much worse during my absence? xD**

**Please leave a review. Love y'all**


	11. Do You Trust Me?

We make our way out of the machinery room again, me walking in the back with my mother.

"I'm not stupid", she mumbles to me. "I know you want nothing to do with me- though I still don't quite understand why-"

I interrupt her with a snort.

"But", she continues, "I will extend my invitation again. We could use your help here, and I know you are like-minded about the faction system-"

"Evelyn. I chose Dauntless."

"Choices can be made again", she pushes.

"What makes you think I'm interested in spending time anywhere near you?" I say, my voice loud and my steps faltering with anger.

"Because I'm your mother." I wasn't prepared for her to sound so honest, so vulnerable. "Because you're my son."  
"You really don't get it. You don't have the vaguest conception of what you've done to me." I take a deep breath to not let the emotions swirling inside of me take control. "I don't want to join up with your little band of factionless. I want to get out of here as quickly as possible."

"My little band of factionless is twice the size of Dauntless", she argues. "you would do well to take it seriously. Its actions may determine the future of this city."

With that, she storms out of the room, and I suddenly feel week. With her gone, all the anger and the storm of painful memories calmed too.

"How long have you known?" Tris asks as I lean back against the cool wall.

"About a year. She sent a coded message to me in Dauntless, telling me to meet her at the train yard." I close my eyes, trying to block out any disturbing emotions. "I did, because I was curious, and there she was. Alive. It wasn't a happy reunion, as you can probably guess."

"Why did she leave Abnegation?"

"She had an affair." I shake my head at the thought of our messed up "family", if you can even call it that. "And no wonder, since my father… Well, let's just say Marcus wasn't any nicer to her than he was to me."

She hesitates for a moment before her next question, knowing that the subject is painful for me, but I endure them because she has the right to know.

"Is… that why you're angry with her?" she says finally. "Because she was unfaithful to him?"

"No." I say firmly, opening my eyes. Just looking into her bright, strong ones makes me feel slightly better. "No, that's not why I'm angry."

"Then why?" she asks, coming closer.

"She had to leave my father, I get that", I explain. "But did she think of taking me with her?"

"Oh. She left you with him." Her eyes turn thoughtful.

"Yeah. She did."

What would my life had been like if she hadn't, if she'd brought me with her? Would I be living like this too, scrambling for food as a factionless?

Tris suddenly laces her fingers together with mine, and we stay silent.

"It seems to me that the factionless are better friends than enemies", I say after a while, looking down at our entwined hands.

"Maybe", she says. "But what would the cost of that friendship be?"

"I don't know", I reply honestly. "But we may not have any other option."

Dinner that night consisted of heated up cans filled with different kinds of food like soup, eggs and peas. I sit a couple next to Tris, eating without thinking too closely about what the food taste like, letting my thoughts roam free for a while as I watch the flames of the campfire dance in the darkness. Tris draws my attention, and I finally look away from fire as she passes me a can of beans, which I pass to the next person without even trying it.

"Are many of you from Erudite?" Tris asks, and I realize she's been having a conversation with Theresa and Edward who is suddenly sitting next to her.

"Most are from Dauntless, actually," Theresa replies with a shake of her head. "Then Erudite, then Candor, then a handful of Amity. No one fails Abnegation initiation, though, so we have very few of those, except for a bunch who survived the simulation attack and came to us for refuge."

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised about Dauntless", Tris says.

"Well, yeah. You've got one of the worst initiations, and there's that whole old-age thing."

"Old-age thing?" She glances over at me, voice confused and eyes curious.

"Once the Dauntless reach a certain level of physical deterioration, they are asked to leave", I explain. "In one way or another."

"What's the other way?" she asks.

"Let's just say that for some, death is preferable to factionlessness."

"Those people are idiots", Edward snorts. "I'd rather be factionless than Dauntless."

Maybe I shouldn't take it personally, but I do. I'm not sure what's going to happen to our faction after this, but Dauntless is still my faction.

"How fortune that you ended up where you did, then." I glare at him.

"Fortunate? Yeah. I'm so fortune, with my one eye and all", says Edward sarcastically.

"I seem to recall hearing rumors that you provoked that attack", I say.

"What are you talking about? He was winning, that's all," Tris protests, "and Peter was jealous, so he just…" Her voice falters as she looks over at Edward who's smirking.

"There was an inciting incident", Edward admits. "In which Peter did not come out the victor. But it certainly didn't warrant a butter knife to the eye."

"No arguments here", I agree. "If it makes you feel any better, he got shot in the arm from a foot away during the simulation attack."

His face lightens up- only slightly, but still. "Who did that? You?"

I shake my head. "Tris did."

"Well done", says Edward.

Tris only nods, staring into the fire, her expression a mix between sadness and thoughtfulness.

I force myself to look away from her eyes, a reflection of the fire sparkling in them.

"Do you know much about how things are right now?" I ask, turning toward Edward. "Did all the Dauntless side with Erudite? Has Candor done anything?"

"Dauntless is slip in half", Edward replies. "Half at Erudite headquarters, half at Candor headquarters. What's left of Abnegation is with us. Nothing much has happened yet. Except for whatever happened to you, I guess."

I nod. At least our entire faction wasn't stupid enough to side with the Erudite.

I don't eat much that night, but when Tris is finished eating I find some blankets and a space for us to sleep in. I untie my shoes to take them off, but when I look up again Tris is in front of me, wrapping her arms around me. Her soft fingers slide over my back, tracing my tattoo in the darkness. Her touch is warm and soothing, and I close my eyes.

"I wish we were alone", I say, breathless from having her so close.

"I almost always wish that", she replies in a low voice.

Tris falls asleep before me, and I'm just about to follow when someone taps my shoulder. I look up, startled, to find Evelyn leaning over me.

"I need to talk to you", she whispers, eyes flickering toward Tris. "Alone."


	12. Innocent until found Guilty

I get up as quietly as possible and we move a few feet away from Tris, hunched on the floor.

"I'm not sure exactly how to convince you, but I really do need your help with this", Evelyn whispers. "Please, Tobias. For me."

I shake my head sternly. "You'll have to tell me what's going on here if you expect me to consider helping you. Though I'm still not sure why you need me at all."

"What would you like to know, exactly?"  
"Tell me about the chart. And the map."  
"Your friend was correct in thinking that the map and the chart listed all of our safe houses", she tells me. "He was wrong about the population counts… sort of. The numbers don't document all the factionless- only certain ones. And I'll bet you can guess which ones those are."

I wait for her to continue, but when she doesn't I sigh. "I'm not in the mood for guessing."

"The Divergent. We're documenting the Divergent."

I immediately think of Tris and my eyes briefly glance at her small body. In the wrong hands, this information could lead to the murder of a lot of innocents.

"How do you know who they are?"

"Before the simulation attack, part of the Abnegation aid effort involved testing the factionless for a certain genetic anomaly. Sometimes that testing involved re-administering the aptitude test. Sometimes it was more complicated than that. But they explained to us that they suspected we might have the highest Divergent population of any group in the city."

"I don't understand. Why-"  
"Why would the factionless have a high Divergent population?" A small smile curls her lips, but it's one drained of humor. "Obviously those who can't confine themselves to a particular way of thinking would be most likely to leave a faction or fail its initiation, right?"

"That's not what I was going to ask", I say, slightly annoyed. "I want to know why you care how many Divergent there are."

"The Erudite are looking for manpower", she explains. They found it temporarily in Dauntless. Now they'll be looking for more, and we're the obvious place, unless they figure out that we've got more Divergent than any other group. Just in case they don't, I want to know how many people we've got who are resistant to simulations."

"Fair enough," I admit, "but why were the Abnegation so concerned with finding the Divergent? It wasn't to help Jeanine, was it?"

"Of course not. But I'm afraid I don't know. The Abnegation were reluctant to provide information that only serves to relieve curiosity. They told us as much as they believed we should know."

"Strange." My thoughts are racing with this new information.

"Perhaps you should ask your father about it," Evelyn says. "He was the one who told me about you."

"About me," I blurt out without thinking. "What about me?"

"That he suspected you were Divergent," she replies. "He was always watching you. Noting your behavior. He was very attentive to you. That's why . . . that's why I thought you would be safe with him. Safer with him than with me."

I don't know what to say to that. The best I can do is to keep this boiling anger inside of me from taking over.

"I see now that I must have been wrong", says Evelyn.

I stay quiet.

"I wish—"

"Don't you dare try to apologize", I interrupt her, my voice shaking with anger. "This is not something you can bandage with a word or two and some hugging, or something."

"Okay, okay. I won't." She looks away from me for a brief moment, and I wonder if I just imagined the small flash of guilt in her eyes.

"For what purpose are the factionless uniting?" I say, changing the subject. "What do you intend to do?"

"We want to usurp Erudite," she says. "Once we get rid of them, there's not much stopping us from controlling the government ourselves."

"That's what you expect me to help you with. Overthrowing one corrupt government and instating some kind of factionless tyranny." I snort. "Not a chance."

"We don't want to be tyrants. We want to establish a new society. One without factions."

The thought of that is so unimaginable that I just let out a low, sarcastic laugh. "Right. So how are you going to usurp Erudite?"

"Sometimes drastic change requires drastic measures." She shrugs a little. "I imagine it will involve a high level of destruction. As for why we need you; in order to do this, we will need Dauntless's help. They have the weapons and the combat experience. You could bridge the gap between us and them."

"Do you think I'm important to the Dauntless?" I protest. "Because I'm not. I'm just someone who isn't afraid of much."

"What I am suggesting," Evelyn continues, "is that you become important. I am sure you can find a way, if you want to. Think about it." With that, she rises. "The door is always open."

I watch her leave before quietly crawling back under my blankets next to a still sleeping Tris. I know that I should tell her what as soon as possible, yet something inside of me warns me not to, that she'll be better of without knowing. That maybe this is a decision I have to make on my own. With that, I finally fall asleep.

When I wake up the next morning, Tris has already gone to shower, and I decide to do the same. The clothes from Amity I'm wearing are dirty and smelly, and it'll be nice to wash my hair again. It takes almost an hour for me to get washed in the water from one of the few sinks in the bathroom. When I step out of the room I almost immediately find Tris's eyes in the crowd, and I know that we're thinking of the same thing. We're fed, clean and back in black clothes; we're ready to leave.

Candor Headquarters is only a couple of minutes walk away from the factionless building, and the time isn't nearly enough for us to really think too much about what will happen next.

We stand in front of the glass doors to Candor Headquarters for a couple of seconds, trying to prepare for whatever was waiting for us inside those doors.

"Here we go", I say, my voice low, serious, and we walk through the doors.

Immediately a Dauntless soldier approaches us, her gun aimed directly at me, obviously under the belief that I am the biggest threat.

"Identify yourselves", she orders.

"Four. And this is Tris." I gesture toward her. "Both Dauntless."

A look of shock crosses the soldiers face.

"Some help here?" she calls out to a couple of her dark-dressed figures further away in the building.

Help? Why would she need back up? Do we really look that intimidating?

"Is there a problem?" I ask.

"Are you armed?" she says instead.

What a stupid question.

"Of course I'm armed. I'm Dauntless, aren't I?"

"Stand with your hands behind your head." She wears a grim look on her face, one that shows that she's prepared for anything.

"We walked through the front door", says Tris, her voice cautious. "You think we would have done that if we were here to hurt you?"

She's right, but there's no point in arguing, so I just lift my hands and hold them up behind my head, hoping that Tris'll follow.

The soldiers that the first Dauntless guard called for start to search us, searching through our pockets, feeling for anything hidden under our clothes.

"I have a knife in my back pocket", Tris suddenly says. "Put your hands on me, and I will make you regret it."

I don't know why, but I almost feel like laughing. That's the Tris I know.

"What's going on?" I say. I don't quite know what I was expecting, but it wasn't a full body search by people from my own faction.

"I'm sorry", the first soldier says. "But we were instructed to arrest you upon your arrival."


	13. Questions of Truth

_Upon your arrival._ So they had been expecting us. Had we walked into a trap, or were these just extra security measures?

The soldiers walk in a circle around us as we move toward the elevator. It takes us to the third floor and to the holding cells, where we're put into a cold, empty room is cold with no furniture except for a stone bench against one of the walls, which I sit down on. The door slams shut and I hear the locks click in place.

Instead of sitting down next to me, Tris starts to pace. At first I try to ignore her and focus on her breathing, but then the sound of her rapid footsteps starts to get to me. Why would this make her so upset? It's not like we've been accused of anything. No, something's bothering her- something that she isn't telling me.

"Can you please calm down? You're making me nervous."  
"This is me calming down", she argues, turning toward me.

"The wound in your lip begs to differ", I say, noticing the blood on her lip.

She finally sits down next to me, curling into a little ball, but she still doesn't relax.

"Sometimes", I say slowly, "I worry that you don't trust me."

"I trust you. Of course I trust you. Why would you think otherwise?"  
"Just seems like there's something you're not telling me. I told you things… I would never have told anyone else. Something's been going on with you, though, and you haven't told me yet."

The image of her in the Amity cafeteria flashes before me, her body frozen in the spot with the barrel of a gun pointed against her head.

"There's been a lot going on", says Tris. "You know that. And anyway, what about you? I could say the same thing to you."

I take a deep breath. I don't want to start a fight with her right now. I just need the truth.

I lift my hand and place it gently against her cheek, her soft hair between my fingers.

"If it's just about your parents, tell me and I'll believe you."

She places her hand on top of mine. "That's all it is."

"Okay", I say, and this time I believe her. She wouldn't lie to my face.

I lean toward her and we kiss briefly. Then the door opens and several people dwell in, and among them stands Candor's leader Jack Kang.

"They told me you seemed confused about why you were arrested", says Jack. "To me that means either you're falsely accused or good at pretending. The only-"

"What are we accused of?" Tris asks, interrupting him.

Okay, I was wrong. Maybe we were being accused after all.

"He is accused of crimes against humanity. You are accused of being his accomplice."

"Crimes against humanity?" I repeat, my voice sharp. If anything, I was fighting _for_ humanity. "What?"

"We saw video footage of the attack", Jack replies. "You were running the attack simulation."

_Running the attack simulation._ Guilt clenches my heart, but I force the thought out of my mind.

"How could you have seen footage?" I ask. "We took the data."

"You took one copy of the data. All the footage of the Dauntless compound recorded during the attack was also sent to other computers throughout the city. All we saw was you running the simulation and her nearly getting punched to death before she gave up." Pang. A twist of a knife in my heart by another memory I'd rather not think about.

"Then you stopped, had a rather abrupt lovers' reconciliation, and stole the hard drive together", Jack continues. "One possible reason is because the simulation was over and you didn't want us to get our hands on it."  
"The simulation didn't end", says Tris. "We stopped it, you-"

Jack interrupts her. "I am not interested in what you have to say right now. The truth will come out when you are both interrogated under the influence of truth serum."

"Truth serum?" I'm not sure if I'm only imagining the slight shake of Tris's voice as she speaks. "No. No way."

"There's something you have to hide?" Jack says.

A moment of silence passes as they stare at each other, before Tris shakes her head.

"All right, then. It is now noon. The interrogation will be at seven. Don't bother preparing for it. You can't withhold information while under the influence of the truth serum." With that, Jack Kang and his accomplices leaves the room.

"What a pleasant man", I say sarcastically, not quite sure whether I'm speaking to Tris or to myself.  
A few hours later in the afternoon Tris and I are escorted to separate bathrooms. I decide to take a quick shower and when I step out of it, towel wrapped around me, I find a fresh pair of black clothes waiting for me on one of the benches. I quickly change before the guards follow me back to the holding room. Tris isn't back yet, but someone delivers a plate with two sandwiches on. The bread is a little dry, but the cheese and ham are fresh and taste all right. Tris returns only moments after that, hesitating by the door for a couple of seconds.

"Hungry?" I ask her, holding my plate toward her.

She grabs one of them, sitting down next to me. We both finish our sandwiches pretty quickly, hungry after all that has happened. After a while of just sitting, waiting, we end up on the cold floor, her body so close that I feel her warmth against my skin.

"What are you afraid of saying?" I ask, remembering her protests against the use of truth serum.

"Any of it", she replies. "All of it. I don't want to relive anything."  
I nod. It's understandable; she did after all loose both of her parents and suffered a gunshot injury to her shoulder.

She falls asleep pretty soon after that, but my head is so crowded with thoughts that I can't get any rest.

I think about how my life used to be, spending my days in the control room and my evenings with Zeke and Shauna. Where had they gone? Were they… dead? If not, were they traumatized after everything they'd been through?

The upcoming questioning isn't bothering me as much as it seems to bother Tris. Even after promising to believe her about her recent behavior being because of her parents, some small suspicion keeps nagging at the back of my head, telling me that something's wrong. And if she is keeping something from me, I'll get the truth at the questioning. But if she's telling the truth there's no harm done anyways. Well, except for her having to relive her parents' death, which if it were up to me I'd do anything to protect her from, seeing as she still hasn't quite gotten over it. But I have no power here.

I'm not sure how much time passes, but I suddenly hear footsteps outside the door. Tris awakens with a jerk as the door slides open, and it's time for the questioning.


	14. Answers of Lies

We both get up as a group of Dauntless enter the small room, one of them being Christina. She rushes toward Tris, wrapping her arms around her, hard. Tris cries out in pain.

"Got shot", she says through clenched teeth. "Shoulder. Ow."

"Oh God!" Christina says apologetically. "Sorry, Tris."  
A moment of silence passes as they both study each other, the other Dauntless waiting for us impatiently.

"You okay? I heard you were here so I asked to escort you", Christina continues as we follow the Dauntless out of the holding room. "I know you didn't do it. You're not a traitor."  
"I'm fine", Tris says. "And thank you. How are you?"

"Oh, I'm…" Christina hesitates, although I can't see her face since she and Tris are walking in front of me. "Did anyone tell you… I mean, maybe now isn't the time, but…"

My body goes cold, preparing for bad news.

"What? What is it?" says Tris.

"Um… Will died in the attack."

My stomach sinks. Will was one of Tris's best friends from Dauntless. I want to reach forward, touch her cheek and comfort her, but for some reason, she doesn't seem as shocked as I thought she'd be.

"I know", Tris says instead. "I saw him on the monitors when I was in the control room. I'm sorry, Christina."

My muscles freeze, and I would've stopped walking if not for one of the Dauntless soldiers' hand on my shoulder, guiding me forward.

_She's lying._

I was with her in the control room- Will was never on the monitors. But why would she lie about this? She must know something about his death, something she doesn't want anyone to know about.

"Oh", Christina says as we reach the elevators. "Well, I'm… glad you already knew. I really didn't want to break the new to you in a hallway."

All six of us enter one of the small elevators.

"Don't worry about the truth serum. It's easy. You barely know what's happening when you're under", Christina explains. "It's only when you resurface that you even know what you said. I went under when I was a kid. It's pretty commonplace in Candor."

The other Dauntless exchange disapproving looks, but now one says anything. Frankly speaking, I don't really care about the old "rules" anymore. Right now, the most important thing on my mind is finding out what Tris is hiding, and why.  
A flash of anger spreads through me. She promised it was just about her parents. She lied, _again. _

"Is everyone else all right?" Tris asks. "Uriah, Lynn, Marlene?"

"All here. Except Uriah's brother, Zeke, who is with the other Dauntless."

Now _that_ information got to me. I never would've thought Zeke, of all people, would be so stupid.

"What?" Tris says.

"I know", says Christina. "No one saw it coming."

We have to walk through several more hallways before reaching a set of doors leading into a huge, open room, crammed with people.

And out of nowhere, I suddenly feel nervous. Revealing information about myself has never been my strong side- and now I've got to do it in front of all these people?  
Without really thinking, I take Tris's hand as we're guided into the middle of the room, and with just that simple touch we support and strengthen each other.

"My name is Niles", says a dark-skinned man suddenly, holding a black box. "I will be your questioner. You-" he gestures toward me. "You will be going first. So if you will please step forward…"  
With a quick squeeze I let go of Tris's hand, walking up to the man and sitting down in a wooden chair strategically placed where everyone will be able to see me. Niles opens the little box, revealing two syringes.

"The injection site is in your neck", he explains as I put some antiseptic where I'm used to getting injected, and then he inserts the needle.

The next second, the whole world turns blurry, and the only thing I can really see clearly is Niles. I try to remember what I'm doing, where I am, but my mind is blank. I can't focus on anything, can't form a coherent thought.

"I will ask you a series of simple questions so that you can grow accustomed to the serum as it takes full effect. Now. What is your name?"

_Tobias Eaton._ The answer pops up immediately in my head, pressing against me with so much force that I almost say it out loud- but something deep inside prevents me from doing that, although I don't quite know what. The only thing I can remember is that for some reason I should keep it to myself. Yet I can't lie, the pressure in my head is too strong. Some kind of mental battle plays out in my head, giving me a headache, before I finally say; "Four."

"That is a nickname", Niles argues. "What is your real name?"  
"Tobias", I say, clenching my teeth together before my last name can pop out of my mouth.

"What are the names of your parents, Tobias?" Niles apparently isn't someone who gives up easily.

_Eaton. Evelyn and Marcus Eaton. Say it!_

My head is throbbing yet I keep reminding myself that I've got some valid reason for not wanting to reveal this information, even though I can't remember it at the moment.

"Why is this relevant?" I say instead.

"Maybe it wasn't relevant before, Tobias, but it is now that you've resisted answering the question. The names of your parents, please."

_EVELYN AND MARCUS EATON._

This time, the pressure is too strong, and I can't fight it anymore without my head exploding. "Evelyn and Marcus Eaton."

The room erupts into chatter, but I close my eyes and try to block them out.

When the room has gone quiet again, Niles speaks up. "So you are a faction transfer, are you not?"

"Yes." The word springs out of my mouth like it had a life of it's own.

"You transferred from Abnegation to Dauntless?" Niles continues.

"Yes", I blurt out again, a sharp edge to my tone. "Isn't that obvious?"  
"One of the purposes of this interrogation is to determine your loyalties, so I must ask: Why did you transfer?"

_No._ The word burns through my head and I stare at Niles, not hiding my anger. I press my lips together to keep from talking, the truth screaming in my head with overwhelming force. But while I might not remember any reasons for lying, I can still remember the pain from those memories, and speaking the words will only make it worse.

"I'll ask you again. It is important that we understand the extent of your loyalty to your chosen faction. So why did you transfer to Dauntless, Tobias?"

"To protect myself", I blurt out, not realizing that I'd let my shield down, allowing the truth to take hold of me. "I transferred to protect myself."

"Protect yourself from what?"

"From my father."


	15. Honestly Tell Me

This time, instead of the room bursting into chatter, it goes completely quiet.

"Thank you for your honesty", Niles says in a low voice, the words being repeated by the rest of the people in the room, and I suddenly don't feel as attacked as I did before. Maybe telling the truth isn't too bad.

"Is your allegiance with your current faction, Tobias?" Niles continues.

"My allegiance is with anyone who does not support the attack on Abnegation."

"Speaking of which, I think we should focus on what happened that day. What do you remember about being under the simulation?"

Painful memories of what happened that day flashes through my head.

"I was not under the simulation, at first. It didn't work", I reply.

"What do you mean, it didn't work?" Niles says with a small laugh, like what I just said was unimaginable.

"One of the defining characteristics of the Divergent is that their minds are resistant to simulations", I explain. "And I am Divergent. So no, it didn't work."

That gets a reaction from the room; shouts with anger, cries of fear, whoops of cheerfulness. It takes a couple of minutes for Niles to quiet everyone down, with the threat that if they do not stay silent they will be removed from the room.

"Now", Niles says. "When you say 'resistant to simulations', what do you mean?"

"Usually, it means we're aware during simulations", I say. "But the attack simulation was different, using a different kind of simulation serum, one with long-range transmitters. Evidently the long-range transmitters didn't work on the Divergent at all, because I awoke in my own mind that morning."

Now, when I'm not fighting the serum, the words just flow out of me without me giving them so much as a second thought. I'm more relaxed now, talking about this than about my father, and my calmness is allowing the serum to take full effect on me.

"You say you weren't under the simulation at firs.t Can you explain what you mean by that?" Niles asks.

"I mean that I was discovered and brought to Jeanine, and she injected a version of the simulation serum that specifically targeted the Divergent. I was aware during that simulation, but it didn't do much good."

"The video footage from the Dauntless headquarters show you running the simulation", he argues. "How, exactly, do you explain that?"

"When a simulation is running, your eyes still see and process the actual world, but your brain no longer comprehends them. On some level, though, your brain still knows what you're seeing and where you are." God, not even _I_ knew that I had this much information inside of me. Not quite sure where the words are coming from, I continue. "The nature of this new simulation was that it recorded my emotional responses to outside stimuli, and responded by altering the appearance of that stimuli. The simulation made my enemies into friends, my friends into enemies. I thought I was shutting the simulation down. Really I was receiving instructions about how to keep it running."

"We have seen footage of what ultimately happened to you in the control room but it is confusing", Niles says. "Please describe it to us."

Memories, flashes, only parts of what happened while under the simulation are clear to me.

"Someone entered the room, and I thought it was a Dauntless soldier, trying to stop me from destroying the simulation. I was fighting her, and…" I remember the feel of my fist hitting her jaw, reaching out to kick her… Scowling I hide the memory away, and try to explain. "… and then she stopped, and I got confused. Even if I had been awake, I would have been confused. Why would she surrender? Why didn't she just kill me?"  
Strong feelings suddenly take over, the electricity between us, her bright eyes… I immediately find her in the crowd when I turn my head. "I still don't understand how she knew that it would work. I think my conflicted emotions confused the simulations. And then I heard her voice. Somehow, that enabled me to fight the simulation."

That moment, when I realized who I was fighting, when I realized that I almost killed Tris, is still fresh and painful, yet so beautiful. I thought she was lost to me forever.

"I recognized her, finally," I continue. "We went back into the control room, and stopped the simulation."  
"What is the name of this person?" asks Niles.

"Tris. Beatrice Prior, I mean", I correct myself.

"Did you know her before this happened?"

"Yes."  
"How did you know her?"

"I was her instructor. Now we're together."  
"I have a final question", he says. "Among the Candor, before a person is accepted into our community, they have to completely expose themselves. Given the dire circumstances we are in, we require the same of you. So, Tobias Eaton: what are you're your deepest regrets?"

The answer is obvious, as clear as the sun to me. But if I thought it was hard to admit to myself, admitting it in front of all these people is even harder. I sigh.

"I regret… I regret my choice."  
"What choice?"

"Dauntless. I was born for Abnegation. I was planning on leaving Dauntless, and becoming factionless. But then I met her, and…" I suddenly come to think of that day when I threw knives at her, when I realized that I couldn't leave, when I finally admitted to myself how I felt about her. "... I felt like maybe I could make something more of my decision. Choosing Dauntless in order to escape my father was an act of cowardice. I regret that cowardice. It means I am not worthy of my faction. I will always regret it."

For a second, the room is entirely quiet. But then the room starts to whisper, the words being repeated throughout the entire room.

"Thank you for your honesty."

**Sorry for a shorter chapter… but I have more prepared for y'all :) Don't forget to leave a review!**


	16. To Tell or Not to Tell

He gestures for me to move out of the center, and I get up slowly, fighting the heaviness of the serum. I walk toward where I'd seen Tris and Christina standing, and on my way there I pass by Tris. I reach out for her hand, giving her a comforting squeeze, and then the moment is over and she's gone. I walk up and stand next to Christina, neither of us saying anything.

Tris applies antiseptic to her neck, but before he can insert the needle into her neck, she mumbles something to him, and he hands her the syringe, and she does it herself.

She stumbles toward the chair, Niles grabbing her arm to steady her, and she sits down. Only moments later, her face goes blank, and I remember how I'd felt only moments earlier.

"What is your name?" Niles begins.

"Beatrice Prior."  
"But you go by Tris?"  
"I do."  
"What are the names of your parents, Tris?"  
"Andrew and Natalie Prior."  
"You are also a faction transfer, are you not?"  
"Yes."  
She tilts her head, throws a brief glance at me, and her expression is a mix between confusion and… thoughtfulness.

"You came from Abnegation?" says Niles. "And chose Dauntless?"  
"Yes", Tris repeats, a new edge of sharpness in her voice.

"Why did you transfer?"

She takes a few seconds to answer, closing her eyes. "I wasn't good enough for Abnegation, and I wanted to be free. So I chose Dauntless."  
"Why weren't you good enough?"  
"Because I was selfish."

I shake my head slightly, pressing my lips together, but stay quiet.

Tris has never been selfish, just stronger, more independent. She was never afraid of having her own opinions, and in a faction where you never get to think for yourself, they made her believe that that was wrong, that she was being selfish.

"You were selfish?" Niles points out. "You aren't anymore?"

"Of course I am. My mother said that everyone is selfish, but I became less selfish in Dauntless. I discovered there were people I would fight for. Die for, even."

"Tris, would you please tell us what happened the day of the attack?"

"I woke up, and everyone was under the simulation. So I played along until I found Tobias", says Tris.  
"What happened after you and Tobias were separated?"

"Jeanine tried to have me killed, but my mother saved me. She used to be Dauntless, so she knew how to use a gun. She distracted the Dauntless soldiers so I could get away, and they killed her."

A chill runs down my spine as I think of how horrible that must've been for her. Watching her mother die… I wouldn't wish that for anyone.

"I kept running", Tris continues. "And…"  
She hesitates, and I suddenly realize that something's wrong. She's fighting the serum, trying to keep something hidden. There's something she doesn't want to tell me.

"And I found my brother and father," she finally says. "We formed a plan to destroy the simulation."  
She stiffens in her chair, looking uncomfortable. "We infiltrated the Dauntless compound, and my father and I went up to the control room. He fought of the Dauntless soldiers at the expense of his life. I made it to the control room, and Tobias was there."  
"Tobias said you fought him, but then stopped. Why did you do that?"  
"Because I realized that one of us would have to kill the other," she says, "and I didn't want to kill him."

"You gave up?"  
"No! No, not exactly. I remembered something I had done in my fear landscape in Dauntless initiation… in a simulation, a woman demanded that I kill my family, and I let her shoot me instead. It worked then. I thought…" She struggles for a second, trying to get her words out. "I was so frantic, but all I could think was that there was something to it; there was a strength in it. And I couldn't kill him, so I had to try."

"So you were never under the simulation?" says Niles.

"No." She pauses, her eyes blank with held back tears. "No. No, I am Divergent."

"Just to clarify, are you telling me that you were almost murdered by the Erudite… and then fought your way into the Dauntless compound… and destroyed the simulation?"  
"Yes."  
"I think I speak for everyone," Niles says slowly, "when I say that you have earned the title of Dauntless."

To this, a group of people cheers and raises their fists; other members of Dauntless.

"Beatrice Prior", Niles continues. "What are your deepest regrets?"

"I regret…" Tris starts, but then she pauses, her eyes swiping across the room and then finding mine. I realize that my entire body is stiff, and I remind myself to relax. Then pain flashes through her eyes, pain and despair, and then she cries out; "Will."

"I shot Will", she continues, "while he was under the simulation. I killed him. He was going to kill me, but I killed him. My friend."

A sick feeling goes through my body, and I'm speechless.

That's what she was hiding from me. She had to _kill_ her best friend, and she didn't tell me. She's been lying to my face ever since the attack, and I had to find out by the use of truth serum? Why? Why would she do that?

The room repeats the words, "Thank you for your honesty", again, but my jaw is clenched and I can't open my mouth to form the words. A small part of me notices Christina's stiff posture next to me, but I'm not able to focus on that for long.

The crowd files out of the room and push me with them toward the exit. I elbow my way through the line before I'm taken out the door with them. A Dauntless soldier approaches me, handing me our weapons back. I look back at where Christina and I were standing, just in time to see her walk away from Tris. Uriah walks up to her, his hand on her shoulder.

By now, most of the people have left the room, and I walk over to Tris. Uriah leaves before I get there. She looks up at me as I reach her side, eyes blank with tears.

"I got our weapons back", I say, handing her the knife again.

I'm not sure yet how to feel about all this, but what I do know is that she needs my support right now. It was wrong of her to keep this a secret, but now it has all exploded in her face and I can tell that she doesn't know what to do.

"We can talk about it tomorrow." I don't have to clarify- she knows what I mean.

"Okay."

I put my arm around her, and we make our way out of the room.


	17. Confronting

The next morning I wake up alone. We slept in some hallway on the floor, but Tris isn't in her cot anymore. I'm not sure where she went, but I decide to wait for her to come back. It's early in the morning but she doesn't return until maybe fifteen minutes later. When she finally does, I turn in the opposite direction and head toward the elevators, knowing that she'll follow me.

We stand in silence in the elevator for a while, my arms crossed. I stare at the floor, my mind racing. I don't know where to begin, what to do or say. Should I let myself be angry, and shout at her for what she's done? Or should I try to understand, pretend that I get why she chose to do what she did?

Finally, I decide for the truth. It turns out that the truth is always the easiest option when you don't know what to do.

"You didn't tell me", I say, my voice low. "Why not?"

"Because I didn't… I didn't know how to."

"It's pretty easy, Tris-"

"Oh yeah, it's so easy", she interrupts sarcastically. "All I have to do is go up to you and say, 'By the way, I shot Will, and now guilt is ripping me to shreds, but what's for breakfast?' Right? Right?" Her voice gets louder and louder, and soon she's yelling. "Why don't you try killing one of your best friends and then dealing with the consequences?"

I finally look up from the floor, and she's standing there, shoulders shaking and her hands covering her face.

"Tris", I say softly. I didn't want us to fight- definitely didn't want her to hurt like this. I just wanted answers."I'm sorry. I shouldn't pretend that I understand. I just meant that… I wish you trusted me enough to tell me things like that."

I place my hand on her shoulder, trying to get her to look at me. She doesn't reply, but removes her hands from her face. Her eyes are red and her cheeks streaked with tears.

"I mean, I had to find out that you almost drowned in a water tank from Caleb", I continue. "Doesn't that seem a little strange to you?"

She drags her palms angrily across her cheeks.

"Other things seem stranger. Like finding out that your boyfriend's supposedly dead mother is still alive by seeing her in person. Or overhearing his plans to ally with the factionless, but he never tells you about it. That seems a little strange to me."

She was awake. For a moment I'm overwhelmed, too stunned by what she knew to answer her. I feel my hand slip off her shoulder, but I don't take my eyes away from hers.

"Don't pretend this is only my problem", says Tris. "If I don't trust you, you don't trust me either."  
"I thought we would get to those things eventually", I protest. "Do I have to tell you everything right away?"

"God, Four!" Her voice is sharp and her cheeks are red with anger. I flinch at the use of my nickname. "You don't want to have to tell me everything right away, but I have to tell you everything right away? Can't you see how stupid that is?"

"First of all", I say, "don't use that name like a weapon against me. Second, I was not making plans to ally with the factionless; I was just thinking it over. If I had made a decision, I would have said something to you. And third, it would be different if you had actually intended to tell me about Will at some point, but it's obvious that you didn't."

"I did tell you about Will! That wasn't truth serum; it was me. I said it because I chose to."

I blink- I did not expect that. "What are you talking about?"

"I was aware. Under the serum. I could have lied, I could have kept it from you. But I didn't, because I thought you deserved to know the truth."

"What a way to tell me! In front of over a hundred people! How intimate!" Did she actually think that just because she _chose _to reveal it under the pressure of a big crowd of people it would actually make it okay to lie and to purposely hiding it from me for that long?

"Oh, so it's not enough that I told you; it has to be in the right setting?" she says. "Next time should I brew some tea and make sure the lighting is right, too?"

Something inside of me snaps and I groan, taking a step away from her. I feel my face getting hot with frustration and I take a couple of deep breaths to calm down.

"Sometimes", I say slowly, turning to face her, "it isn't easy to be with you, Tris."

There's a moment of silence before she speaks. "I'm sorry. I should have been honest with you."

"That's it? That's all you have to say?"

"What else do you want me to say?" she asks.

"Nothing, Tris", I say, shaking my head. "Nothing."

Then the elevator doors slide open and I walk out, leaving her behind me.

The rest of the day passes in a blur. I walk around for a bit, trying to clear my thoughts. I'm not sure where Tris is, but it doesn't really matter at the moment. I know that she's safe here.

Just before lunch, a Dauntless member who introduces himself as Philip finds me and shows me a room filled with bunk beds. Apparently a lot of people believed that since I'd revealed who I truly am at the questioning, I also deserved to be treated with the acceptance that was promised for revealing my thoughts.

When lunchtime comes, I find myself not hungry at all, but exhausted. So instead of finding my way to the cafeteria, I lay down on my new bunk and fall asleep almost immediately. When I wake up, there are people in my room. Tris is sitting on the bunk next to the one in front of mine, wrapping a new bandage around her shoulder. Lynn is sitting on the bunk next to hers.

I suddenly hear laughter again and I realize that is what woke me up, and it's coming from Uriah with Marlene on his back, running around the bunk beds.

I smile a little, sitting up in my bed, happy to see that even after everything that's happened, people still have fun.

"I don't see how he can be flirty, with everything that's going on", Lynn says.

"He's supposed to shuffle around, scowling all the time?" says Tris. "Maybe you can learn something from him."

"You're one to talk. You're always moping. We should start calling you Beatrice Prior, Queen of Tragedy."

Tris gets up and gives Lynn a light punch on her arm. "Shut up."

"I don't take orders from Stiffs", Lynn says with a smile and pushes Tris back toward her bunk. "Ready to go?"

I frown, not knowing about their plans to leave.

"Where are you going?" I ask, finally speaking up. I rise from my bunk and stand next to Tris's.

"Top of the Hancock building to spy on Erudite", Lynn replies. "Want to come?"

"No, I've got a few things to take care of here." Also, just the thought of being that high up makes me dizzy. "But be careful", I add.

I reach for her, my fingertips touching her arm. A wave of warmth shoots from my fingers through my body; no matter how much I _want _to be mad and keep my distance, I can't stay away from her. My body still reacts in the same way to her touch, no matter what my brain tries to tell me.

"I'll see you later", I mutter, voice low. "Don't do anything stupid."

"Thanks for that vote of confidence." She scowls at me.

"I didn't mean that", I say. "I meant don't let anyone else do anything stupid. They'll listen to you."

Her bright eyes seem to pull me in, and I suddenly realize how close our faces are. I bite my lip and pull back. Kissing her would send the wrong message, no matter how much I want to. Her eyes turn hurt for just a brief moment, and then she turns and follows Lynn who's already left the room.


	18. Troubled Days

I leave the room shortly after Tris, walking toward the cafeteria to get something to eat, finally hungry. On my way there, I bump into a group of loyal Dauntless soldiers.

"Hey, Tobias", one of them says. I flinch, not used to be called by my real name by someone else than Tris. "There's a meeting on the top floor in a couple of minutes, about something important. I think you should come. I know you'll want to hear what they're saying, and if it concerns our faction, you have the right to know what's going on."

I nod. "Yeah, thanks, I'll be there. I'm just going to grab something to eat first."

"Alright, see you there." They start to make their way toward the elevators and I hurry to grab a sandwich from the cafeteria and eat it on my way to the top floor. The elevator doors slide open, revealing a long, white hallway. I have to walk past several doors and turn several corners before finding the Dauntless soldiers that had invited me.

"It'll start any minute", says the one who had first spoken to me, introducing himself as George.

I nod.

Then someone runs straight into my shoulder. It's a girl dressed in blue, her cheeks flushed and eyes wide.

"Traitors", she breathes. "There are Dauntless traitors in the building!"

I suddenly recognize her from Visiting Day during initiation- she was Will's sister, Cara.

"Woah, slow down", George says, grabbing Cara by the arm. "What're you talking about?"

"They are attacking Candor right now, capturing the Divergent. They're planning to execute them! They have probably already taken over the first and second floor", she says frantically. "You have to stop them, and hurry!"

_Tris. _Where's Tris? Did she make it to the roof, or were she captured before that?

George releases Cara. "I'll inform Kang. The rest of you form a rescue plan; we're all soldiers here."

With that, he disappears through another hallway. Chaos immediately follows, but somehow we manage to form a plan.

We will take the fire exit down to the lobby, where we split up, and attack the Dauntless traitors from different angles- they'll be surrounded.

I'm in one of the groups taking the fire exit all the way down to the second floor, while the rest will come through the elevators, a normal stairwell and another emergency exit. As we walk through the door to the hallway of the second floor, nobody speaks, our footsteps quiet. We're well equipped, each of us with their own gun and ammo. I hold mine in front of me, both my hands wrapped around it in a firm grasp.

It's too quiet in the hallway- they're not here. It isn't until we reach the end of the hallway that we see them, by the elevators; Eric and other Dauntless traitors holding guns, pointed at a group of Divergents lined up on the floor. Tris is one of them, a soldier behind her, dressed in black with a blue band of fabric around his arm. He's pressing a gun to the back of her head. My heart skips a beat, but I try to stay calm. We have to wait for the other groups before attacking, or it'll be suicide.

"Just between you and me… " Eric says, standing in front of Tris. As usual, his sarcastic voice and cold face gives me the chills- though I'm not afraid of him. "I think you might have gotten three, because you're the kind of bullheaded person who would refuse to make a simple choice just because she was told to. Care to enlighten me?

But Tris doesn't respond. Instead, she jerks forward, a knife in her hand, and thrusts it into Eric. At the same time, the other groups arrive from the stairwell and the elevators, and we burst into the room, firing at the traitors and them firing at us. My first victim is the guy that held the gun toward Tris.

We have the element of surprise on our side and manage to take out a few of the traitors before they can react. My eyes find Tris, on the floor, fumbling for a gun but not able to grasp it. I lurch forward, using my arm to press her against the wall. I crouch besides her, shielding her body with my own while firing at everyone wearing blue fabrics around their arms.

"Tell me if anyone's behind me!" I shout to Tris over the gunshots. She can look over my shoulder and keep an eye on the stairs.

A bullet swishes past right next to me, but I find the shooter and kill him with a single bullet straight through his head.

It's an even fight, until more of our loyal Dauntless arrive from the emergency exit. The traitors realize that they're outnumbered and most of them try to escape through the stairs, but I keep firing at them until I run out of ammo. Then I put the gun down and wrap my arms around Tris, waiting until the sound of gunshots fade, until it's quiet again.

I look around, dead bodies surrounding us, both traitor and loyal Dauntless. We lost a lot of people, but so did the Erudite.

I look down at Tris, her eyes blank with tears and her fists clenched in her lap. I suddenly notice that she's still holding the knife in one of her hands, her knuckles white from squeezing the handle so hard.

"Tris", I say softly. "You can put the knife down now."

She stares at me blankly for a second, then looks down at her hand like she didn't realize the knife was still there, and drops it on the floor. I put an arm around her and help her stand.  
"Are you okay?" I ask her. "Did they hurt you?"  
She shakes her head, but the blood on her jaw tells me otherwise. I try to wipe most of it off with my shirtsleeve, but she shakes her head again and pushes my hand away.

"He hit me with a gun", she mumbles. "It'll stop bleeding soon. I'm fine."

I clench my teeth together. It is obvious whom the _he _she's speaking of is. I look over at where Eric is laying on the ground, still conscious but clearly in a lot of pain.

"You sure you're okay?" I say, turning toward Tris again.

"Yeah." She nods, as if convincing herself. "But… how is it that so many were still awake? And how did you find out so quickly what was happening?"

"Cara was among the Erudite and the traitors, but she didn't follow them to take down this floor. Instead, she ran up to the top floor where I was with a bunch of loyal Dauntless", I explain. "We managed to form a plan and catch the traitors by surprise."

"Oh", she says. "Cara. If she's here, she must know… what I did to- what I did." Her voice shakes and she looks down at the floor.

"Tris-" I start, although not quite sure what to tell her.

"No, it's okay", she interrupts me. "I should… should probably go wash up. I'll see you later."  
With that, she breaks out of my arms and turns away with one last look at Eric and the other fallen bodies, before disappearing down the stairs. Shortly after that, Jack Kang and a bunch of loyal Dauntless soldiers enter the room, and he starts to order them around. Two of them carry Eric away, either to the hospital wing or to a holding cell- I'm not sure. Then a few people start to carry away our dead for identification, so that their families can be informed and the bodies can be buried. Uriah and I take it in our own hands to move the wounded Erudite, the traitors, and we leave them in the hospital on the fourth floor. God knows what will happen to them next.

I'm not sure where Tris sleeps that night, if she even does at all, but she doesn't return to her bunk. I lay awake for a long time, thinking over everything that had happened, before the tiredness finally takes over and I fall asleep.

**I loved reading this scene in the book, and enjoyed writing it from Tobias POV even more. It just proved just how important the Divergent were and how badly the Erudite wanted them dead. Anyways, hope you enjoyed! Please leave a review as always :)**


	19. The Deepest Oceans

The next morning I wake up pretty early, and find that Tris's bed is still empty.

I take a quick shower and change to a fresh pair of clothes before heading toward the cafeteria, assuming that Tris will show up when she gets hungry.

"Tobias!" somebody suddenly calls out as I'm making my way to the dining hall.

I look to my right and see Caleb hurrying toward me through one of the connecting hallways.

"Caleb?" I say. "What're you doing here?"

"Just got here", he says. "Heard about the attack about an hour ago and I just felt like I needed to be with my sister."

He came alone? Or did someone else come with him?

"Do you know where Tris is?" Caleb continues before I have the chance to ask.

I shake my head. "I haven't seen her since yesterday, but I'm sure she'll come to the cafeteria for breakfast. I was just heading there."  
"Great", Caleb says. "I'll come with you."

Tris isn't there when we arrive, but we only have to wait a couple of minutes before she enters. Her jaw is bruised and swollen, and for a second it takes me back to when I pulled her off the railing to the chasm, when I brought her to my room and saw the dark purple bruise on her cheek.

Caleb walks toward her, meeting her half way. They wrap their arms around each other, Tris looking over his shoulder and meeting my eyes. They talk for a minute, but I'm standing too far away to hear what they're saying. Shortly, Caleb leaves her side and heads toward the long line for food. As I look into her eyes, for just a second I feel like we're all alone in the room. Then I walk toward her, hesitantly.

"You okay?" I ask her.

She presses her lips together. "I might throw up if I have to answer that one more time. I don't have a bullet in my head, do I? So I'm good."

I scowl at the sudden hostility in her voice. "Your jaw is so swollen you look like you have a wad of food in your cheek, and you just stabbed Eric. I'm not allowed to ask if you're okay?"

She sighs, and the sharpness in her features is gone, replaced by a vulnerability that is heartbreaking. "Yeah. I'm okay."

Every part of me wants to embrace her at that moment, get close to her; comfort her. After a moment's hesitation, I wrap my arms around her. "I'm sorry it took me so long to come get you."

She just sighs again, and we stand like that for a while. I close my eyes and breathe in her scent, take in the warmth of her body against mine. Then she pulls away a little, looking up at me with those striking eyes. "I need to talk to you", she says. "Can we go somewhere quiet?"

I nod, and as we walk out of the cafeteria a couple of voices start to shout at us.

"Oh, look!" someone shouts. "It's Tobias Eaton!"

"I saw your daddy here earlier, Eaton! Are you gonna go hide?" another voice calls out.  
"Yeah, are you gonna hide, coward?"

I freeze, a mix of emotions coursing through me. Fear of seeing my father again. Frustration that I seemed to be the last to know he was back. And then that burning anger, threatening to take over me…

Tris suddenly grabs my arm, interrupting my thoughts, and prompts me toward the elevators. I guess I found out what she wanted to tell me.

"I was going to tell you- he came with Caleb", she says. "He and Peter escaped Amity"

"What were you waiting for, then?" I say, expecting my voice to be hard and cold, but it's not. It just sounds… resigned. Exhausted.

"It's not the kind of new you deliver in a cafeteria", says Tris.  
I think about this for a second, but have to admit that she's right. I wouldn't have said anything then either. "Fair enough."

We don't speak for the entire elevator ride up to the eighteenth floor. I think about my father. So he is still alive, after all. I'm not sure how to feel about that. And what will I do when I see him? I can't let him get to me anymore. I've got to stand up for myself and stop hiding- stop cowering. I need to be Dauntless.

The elevator doors slide open and we enter the big room where we got questioned only a couple of days ago. I move the chair Niles sat in to sit in front of where Tris sits on one of the benches.

"Didn't there used to be two of these?" I say, looking down at the chair. I'm pretty sure Niles had one chair, and Tris and I sat in the same, second chair.

"Yeah, I, uh… It got thrown out the window."  
"Strange." I frown, but let it go. It's none of my business. "So what did you want to talk about? Or was that about Marcus?"

"No, that wasn't it. Are you…" she hesitates for a second, "… all right?"

"I don't have a bullet in my head, do I?" I reply, using her own words against her, but not looking up at her. "So I'm fine. I'd like to talk about something else."

"I want to talk about simulations," she says, changing the subject, "but first, something else – your mother thought Jeanine would go after the factionless next. Obviously she was wrong- and I'm not sure why. It's not like the Candor are battle ready or anything-"

"Well", I interrupt her, having already thought about this. "Think about it. Think it through, like the Erudite."

She glares at me.

"What? If you can't, the rest of us have no hope."  
"Fine", she mutters. "Um… it had to be because Dauntless and Candor were the most logical targets. Because… the factionless are in multiple places, whereas we're all in the same place."  
"Right. Also, when Jeanine attacked Abnegation, she got all the Abnegation data. My mother told me that the Abnegation had documented the factionless Divergent populations, which means that after the attack, Jeanine must have found out that the proportion of Divergent among the factionless is higher than among the Candor. That makes them an illogical target."

"All right. Then tell me about the serum again", says Tris. "It has a few parts, right?"  
"Two. The transmitter and the liquid induce the simulation. The transmitter communicates information to the brain from the computer, and vice versa, and the liquid alters the brain to put it in a simulation state."

"And he transmitter only works for one simulation, right?" She nods a little. "What happens to it after that?"

"It dissolves", I reply. "As far as I know, the Erudite haven't been able to develop a transmitter that lasts for more than one simulation, although the attack simulation lasted far longer than any simulation I've seen before."

She clasps her hands together, expression thoughtful.

"What's this about, Tris?" I ask.

"Have you seen this yet?" she says instead of answering, and points at her bandaged shoulder. That is, the one in which she wasn't shot by a gun.

"Not up close. Uriah and I were hauling wounded Erudite up to the fourth floor all morning."

She starts to remove a corner of the bandage, just enough for me to see a small, circular, dark red wound surrounded by skin the color of the deepest ocean; dark blue. I frown at the sight of it, and she takes a long needle out from her pocket.

"When they attacked," she says, "they weren't trying to kill us. They were shooting us with these."

I reach forward, gently examining the colored skin around the puncture wound in her shoulder. Then I take the needle from her hand, tapping the bottom disc a few times.

"This is probably hollow", I think out loud. "It must have contained whatever that blue stuff in your arm is. What happened after you were shot?"  
"They tossed these gas-spewing cylinders into the room, and everyone went unconscious. That is, everyone but Uriah and me and the other Divergent."

She studies my face for a few seconds after saying this, and then she narrows her eyes. She expected me to be surprised that Uriah was Divergent. "Did you know that Uriah was Divergent?"

"Of course", I say with a shrug. "I ran his simulations, too."

"And you never told me?"  
"Privileged information", I explain. "Dangerous information."  
She bites her lip and stays quiet for a while. Then she clears her throat, meeting my eyes as she speaks. "You saved our lives, you know. Eric was trying to hunt us down."

"I think we're past keeping track of who has saved whose life."  
We both stay silent for a while, remembering what now seems like a completely different life.

"Anyway," she finally says. "After we figured out that everyone was asleep, Uriah ran upstairs to warn the people who were up there, and I went to the second floor to figure out what was going on. Eric had all the Divergent by the elevators, and he was trying to figure out which of us he was going to take back with him. He said he was allowed to take two. I don't know why he was going to take any."

"Odd." It's the only word that comes to mind immediately. And _odd_ is the perfect word to describe the situation.


	20. Less is More

"Any ideas?" Tris asks me.

"My guess is that the needle injected you with a transmitter, and the gas was an aerosol version of the liquid that alter the brain. But why…" I interrupt myself, feeling the pieces click together in my mind. "Oh. She put everyone to sleep to find out who the Divergent were."

"You think that's the only reason for shooting us with transmitters?"

I shake my head. Not the only one, but definitely a big part of it. But she already knew that.

Looking into her eyes, I can see that they are missing that usual curiosity they always used to have. So she's already figured something out. It is instead replaced by something darker, something that I would almost call... despair. Or sadness. Like she _needs_ me to tell her that she's wrong, because she doesn't want to admit the truth. But she has to.

"I think you've already figured it out", I say, "but you want me to contradict you. And I'm not going to."

"They've developed a long-lasting transmittor."

It isn't a question, but I still nod, confirming the terrible truth.

"So now we're all wired for multiple simulations", she continues. "As many as Jeanine wants, maybe."

I just nod again, not quite sure what to say.

"This is really bad, Tobias", Tris says, her voice shaking slightly.

And I can't do anything other than agree with her.

We leave the room shortly after that, but I stop in the hallway, coming to think of something.

"So you attacked Eric. Was that during the invasion?" I ask her. "Or when you were by the elevators?"  
Trick question. I saw when she did it. I just want to know if she's going to tell me the truth.

"By the elevators", she confirms.

I'm relieved that she chose to tell me the truth for once, but at the same time I'm annoyed that she didn't save herself.

"One thing I don't understand", I say, my voice harsh. "You were downstairs. You could have just run away. But instead, you decided to dive into a crowd of armed Dauntless al by yourself. And I'm willing to bet you weren't carrying a gun."  
I remember her fingers trembling around the handle of the gun on the floor by the elevators. No way could she have carried one into the fight.

But she doesn't reply, just squeezes her lips together and looks away from me.

"Is that true?" I demand.

"What makes you think I didn't have a gun?" she asks, avoiding the question.

"You haven't been able to touch a gun since the attack. I understand why, with the whole Will thing, but-"

"That has nothing to do with it."

"No?" I say, not believing her the slightest.

"I did what I had to do."

"Yeah." I know _that_ is true. "But now you should be done. You should have stayed with the Amity. You should have stayed far away from all of this."

"No, I shouldn't have", Tris protests. "You think you know what's best for me? You have no idea. I was going crazy with the Amity. Here I finally feel… sane again."

"Which is odd", I say, "considering you are acting like a psychopath. It's not brave, choosing the position you were in yesterday. It's beyond stupid- it's suicidal. Don't you have any regard for your own life?"

I know that I'm being unfair, yelling at her for being too selfless. I'm aware that it's her life, her choice, and so on. But we're in this together. If I loose her, I loose everything. She has to realize that.

"Of course I do! I was trying to do something useful!" she exclaims.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself.

"You're more than Dauntless", I say. "But if you want to be just like them, hurling yourself into ridiculous situations for no reason and retaliating against your enemies without any regard for what's ethical, go right ahead. I thought you were better than that, but maybe I was wrong."

"You shouldn't insult the Dauntless", Tris says, clenching her fists. "They took you in when you had nowhere else to go. Trusted you with a good job. Gave you all your friends."

I don't have a response for her. She's right. Maybe I was exaggerating about the Dauntless – not everyone's like that.

I expect her to say something more, but she doesn't. Just stares at the floor, her body sagging against the wall.

"Tris."

She doesn't look at me.

"_Tris_", I repeat, more sternly this time.

She finally looks up.

"I just don't want to loose you."

I go to bed early that night, thinking that I probably need a long night's good sleep. Instead I'm woken up at midnight for a meeting, held by Candor's leader, Jack Kang. It takes almost twenty minutes for people to stop filing into the huge room, and when everyone's finally gathered Jack Kang quiets the room by simply holding up his hand.

"I know many of you are confused and shaken by what happened yesterday", he says. "I have heard many reports from a variety of perspectives, and have gotten a sense for what is straightforward and what requires more investigation. What seems to me to require more investigation is the Divergent."

He pauses for a second, looking around the room with tired eyes.

"If you are one of the Divergent, please step forward so that we can hear from you."

I move forward almost immediately. There's no point in lying. Candor is all about telling the truth, and if we expect to get any protection from them we need to be honest. At first, I have to push my way through the crowd, but the further I get the more people realize what's going on, and automatically step back for me.

A few Candor members come forward too, but despite what everyone's heard about Tris and me, Marcus stepping forward is probably what shocks the crowd the most.

"You, Marcus?" Jack says, looking like he can't believe his eyes.

"Yes", my father replies. "I understand that you are concerned- that you all are concerned. You had never heard of the Divergent a week ago, and now all that you know is that they are immune to something to which you are susceptible, and that is a frightening thing. But I can assure you that there is nothing to be afraid of, as far as we are concerned."

_We. _He's speaking for the entire Abnegation.

I feel sick as Marcus puts on the kindest look he can manage as he looks at Jack, but I still see right through him. It's all an act to get people to like and believe him, to win people over to his side so that he can gain power. He doesn't really care that much.

"It seems clear to me that we were attacked so that the Erudite could find the Divergent. Do you know why that is?" Jack asks Marcus.

"No, I do not. Perhaps their intention was merely do identify us. It seems like useful information to have, if they intend to use their simulations again."

That's when another voice speaks up. Tris. "That was not their intention."

She looks surprised for a moment that she even said anything at all, but continues. "They wanted to kill us. They've been killing us since before any of this happened."

Jack frowns at her words. "That sounds very much like a conspiracy theory. What reason would the Erudite have to kill you?"  
Tris's face goes blank as she tries to answer his question. "I…"

"Obviously we don't know", I interrupt her, not letting her get any further dragged into this. "But there are nearly a dozen mysterious deaths recorded among the Dauntless from the past six years, and there is a correlation between those people and irregular aptitude test results or initiation simulation results."

"While that is intriguing, correlation does not constitute evidence", Jack says.

"A Dauntless leader shot a Candor child in the head. Did you get a report of that?" Tris demands. "Did it seem 'worthy of investigation'?"

"In fact I did. And shooting a child in cold blood is a terrible crime that cannot go unpunished. Fortunately, we have the perpetrator in custody and will be able to put him on trial. However, we must keep in mind that the Dauntless soldier did not give any evidence of wanting to harm the majority of us, or they would have killed us while we were unconscious."

_Oh, so it's okay to knock almost an entire faction out as long as you do not kill the majority of them?_

"Their peaceful invasion suggests to me," Jack continues, "that it may be possible to negotiate a peace treaty with the Erudite and the other Dauntless. So I will arrange a meeting with Jeanine Matthews to discuss that possibility as soon as possible."

"Their invasion wasn't peaceful", Tris protests. I can't help but smile a little. She's brave enough to say what I do not. "Just because they didn't shoot you all in the head doesn't mean their intentions were somehow honorable. Why do you think they came here? Just to run through your hallways, knock you unconscious, and leave?"

"I assume they came for people like you", Jack replies calmly. "And while I am concerned for your safety, I don't think we can attack them just because they wanted to kill a fraction of our population."

"Killing you is not the worst thing they can do to you", Tris says. "Controlling you is."  
"Oh? And how will they manage that?" Jack says with a smirk, clearly amused by the situation. I feel sick.

"They shot you with needles", I explain. "Needles full of simulation transmitters. Simulations control you. That's how."

"We know how simulations work", replies Jack. "The transmitter is not a permanent implant. If they intended to control us, they would have done it right away."

"But-" Tris starts to say, but Jack interrupts her.

"I know you have been under a lot of stress, Tris, and that you have done a great service to your faction and to Abnegation. But I think you traumatic experience may have compromised your ability to be completely objective. I can't launch an attack based on a little girl's speculations."  
Tris's face darkens, but she doesn't say anything.

"You don't make our decisions for us, Kang", I say.

That's when the rest of the Dauntless in the room speak up, shouting and cheering.

"You are not the leader of our faction!" several voices call out among the crowd.

Jack waits patiently for the room to quiet down again. "That is true. If you want to, you can feel free to storm the Erudite compound by yourselves. But you will do so without our support, and may I remind you, you are greatly outnumbered and unprepared."

He waits a few seconds for either of us to reply with some kind of protest, but nothing comes to my mind. He's right. Not a lot of Dauntless remain after the simulation attack on Abnegation, and I'm guessing only a small part of those still alive currently resides in Candor headquarters.

"I thought so", Jack says, obviously satisfied with the respond- or lack there of. "Very well. I will contact Jeanine Matthews, and see if we can negotiate a peace. Any objections?"

The room stays quiet.

**Woah, long chapter! Hope you guys enjoyed reading, please leave a review if you did. And thanks for staying with me even while not updating during Christmas/Winter Break… **


	21. Plotting and Planning

After the meeting, everything returns to normal. Or, well, as normal as it can be after everything that happened. Tris goes to help clean up in the lobby while I head to the cafeteria to get something for us to eat. Neither of us had eaten anything since earlier this morning, and we'd both missed lunch while being at the meeting. When I get there the food has already been cleared out and they're preparing for dinner, so I have to wait ten minutes for them to finish the first couple of hamburgers. I take them to-go and head toward the lobby. When I step out of the elevators though, I'm met by a couple of Dauntless carrying a body. Tori's body.  
"What happened?" I demand as coldness spreads through my body.

One of the Dauntless shrugs as they walk into the elevator and the doors close behind them.

I turn around and see a couple of people gathered by the entrance. Among them are Tris, Lynn, Uriah and Zeke.

"Zeke?" I say as I come closer.

"Hey, Four", he says and grins a little. "How's it going?"

"What happened?" I ask. "Aren't you supposed to be in Erudite?"

"We were caught", Zeke says, the grin slipping of his face. "We got away but Tori was shot. I heard you guys were here and I couldn't think of anywhere else to go, so I brought her here. Oh, and about that. How are things here? I heard about the attack…"

He presses his lips together.

"We're okay, I think. Thankfully, Cara managed to warn a couple of loyal Dauntless and we managed to take control over the situation. If she hadn't gotten to us… I don't even want to think about what would've happened to all the Divergents." I shiver, closing my eyes for a brief moment. Tris would probably have been dead, had Cara not warned us. So would all the other Divergents be too.

"Yeah, not that the Candor are going to do anything about it," Lynn says, "except standing by and trying to achieve some kind of peace agreement." The disgust in her voice is obvious.

"Peace agreement?" Zeke asks. "How?"

"He's arranging some kind of meeting with Jeanine Matthews", I reply. "But I think we all know that Jeanine won't agree to peace without getting what she wants, and Jack Kang won't fight for us until he realizes that she's not going peacefully about this."

Zeke shakes his head. "We have to do something."

"You think you can get some information about their meeting?" Tris suddenly asks me.

I think about it for a second. The same loyal Dauntless soldiers that invited me to the meeting on the day of the attack would probably trust me with that information.

"Yes, I think I can. Why?"

"Well, we need to know what's going on. They are after all going to talk about our faction and all the Divergents, which include us."

"She's right", Zeke says. "Just get the information, and we'll decide what to do after that, okay?"

I nod. That I can do.

We split up after Tris and I finish our hamburgers. They all go to the Gathering Hall to celebrate Zeke coming back, or something like that, while I go look for the loyal Dauntless. I find them in a hallway outside Jack Kang's office. One of them is George. He has a bandage around his left arm, and I'm guessing he was shot in the rescue mission.

"Four", George says, a little surprised as he sees me. "What can I do for you?"

I lower my voice a bit as I speak. "I need to know when Kang's meeting with Jeanine. We're not going to do anything bad, I promise."  
He opens his mouth as if to protest, but I interrupt him.

"I need you to trust me. It's for the good of our faction, for Dauntless. I swear."

He eyes me suspiciously for a moment, then he nods.

"I'm not in charge of that", he says. "You have to talk to Bud about it."  
He walks over to one of his colleagues, another loyal Dauntless whom I recognize as Tori's co-worker at the tattoo parlor. They exchange words in low voices before Bud approaches me.

"Listen, I don't know a lot of information", he whispers. "And I can't tell you all of it."

"Anything you can give us is good", I say quietly.

"I know that Kang is meeting with an Erudite representative tomorrow morning at seven. She won't be there in person, it's way too risky."  
"Does Kang know that?"  
Bud shakes his head. "He insists Jeanine will show up herself."

"And is he going there alone?" I ask.

Bud shakes his head. "A couple of Candor volunteered to come with him as protection."

I nod. "Thank you."

With no reply he just nods, turns and disappears down the hallways like nothing ever happened.

I return to the dining hall with the information and find the table Tris, Zeke, Shauna, Uriah, Lynn and Marlene are all gathered by. I sit down next to Tris, ready to share.

"Kang is going to meet with a representative of Jeanine Matthews at seven in the morning."

"A representative?" Zeke repeats. "She's not going herself?"

"Yeah, and stand out in the open where a bunch of angry people with guns can take aim?" says Uriah sarcastically. "I'd like to see her try. No, really, I would."

"Is Kang the Brilliant taking a Dauntless escort, at least?" Lynn says.

"Yes, some of the older members volunteered," I say. "Bud said he would keep his ears open and report back."

"So I guess the real question is," Zeke says, eyes thoughtful, "if you were Erudite, what would you say at this meeting?"

I turn toward Tris. If anyone's smart enough to guess what's going to go down at the meeting, it's Tris. She's so good at reading people and situations in a way that I've never been able to. I have to admit that she would fit in, in Erudite too.

"What?" Tris says, looking around at us, and I realize I'm not the only one who knows this about her. The others have noticed too.

"You're Divergent," says Zeke.

"So is Tobias", Tris protests.

"Yeah, but he doesn't have aptitude for Erudite."

"And how do you know I do?"

"Seems likely", Zeke says with a shrug. "Doesn't it seem likely?"

Everyone else around the table nods, and I almost feel like smiling. They're right, she got an aptitude for Erudite too.

"You all have functional brains, last time I checked," says Tris. "You can think like the Erudite, too."

"But we don't have special Divergent brains!" Marlene pokes Tris on her scalp. "Come on, do your magic."

"There's no such thing as Divergent magic, Mar," Lynn says sternly.

"And if there is, we shouldn't be consulting it," Shauna agrees, refusing to look at anyone but Marlene.

"Shauna—" Zeke starts.

"Don't 'Shauna' me!" she interrupts him. "Don't you think someone with the aptitude for multiple factions might have a loyalty problem? If she's got aptitude for Erudite, how can we be sure she's not working for Erudite?"

All the amusement I felt about them choosing Tris for reading into the situation, for being Erudite-like, drains from me. "Don't be ridiculous", I tell Shauna.

Tris chose her faction, and I know for sure that she's one hundred percent loyal to it. And so am I.

"I am not being ridiculous." Shauna protests, angrily smashing her palm against the table. "I know I belong in Dauntless because everything I did in that aptitude test told me so. I'm loyal to my faction for that reason—because there's nowhere else I could possibly be. But her? And you? I have no idea who you're loyal to. And I'm not going to pretend like everything's okay."

She rises angrily from her seat. Zeke tries to stop her but she dismisses him and storms away.

"It's not magic," Tris says when Shauna's gone. Her face is flushed with anger. "You just have to ask yourself what the most logical response to a particular situation is."

Nobody says anything

"Seriously," Tris continues. "If I were in this situation, staring at a group of Dauntless guards and Jack Kang, I probably wouldn't resort to violence, right?"

"Well, you might, if you had your own Dauntless guards", Zeke points out. "And then all it takes is one shot—bam, he's dead, and Erudite's better off."

"Whoever they send to talk to Jack Kang isn't going to be some random Erudite kid; it's going to be someone important. It would be a stupid move to fire on Jack Kang and risk losing whoever they send as Jeanine's representative", Tris replies.

"See? This is why we need you to analyze the situation," says Zeke. "If it was me, I would kill him; it would be worth the risk."

"Fine", Tris says, looking pained. "I think, that Jeanine Matthews will manipulate him. And that he will do anything to protect his faction, even if it means sacrificing the Divergent." She hesitates, her eyes thoughtful. "Or sacrificing the Dauntless. So we need to hear what they say in that meeting."

"So let's listen in," Lynn says, a cold smile on her face.

They all seem to agree that some of us need to hear what they say at that meeting, but I can't let go of this bad feeling that rose it's head as soon as they mentioned listening to the meeting. I can't put my finger on it, but it just feels like something's going to go terribly wrong.


	22. Respectfully So

Later that evening me, Tris and Lauren go to the dining hall for some dinner. It feels like it was ages ago since I last talked to Lauren. I remember how she was the only one I could talk to about my feelings for Tris during initiation, and I feel myself opening up to talk to her without really thinking about it. We've been friends for a long time, and it feels good to see some old faces again. Makes everything seem more normal, amongst all the chaos.

"I can barely remember what Dauntless was like before Eric, and before his new, cruel way to do initiation. I wouldn't say our training methods were more effective, but they were definitely kinder, more brave. We did reckless things, of course, but nothing as stupid as what the Dauntless do nowadays. They're suicidal."  
"Yeah, tell me about it…" I mutter. "Our initiation training methods need to change, at least the part where they have to beat each other unconscious. We need to teach them some self-preservation. "  
Flashes of Peter knocking Tris to the floor pop up in my head.

"Definitely", Lauren agrees. "Although we can't remove the Fear Simulations, we've used those for ages and they're only getting more and more effective."  
I nod. Her words remind me of my four fears, and I wonder if they've changed. Were I to go into it now, would Tris be in it?

_Why is that even a question?_ I tell myself. _Of course she would. I'd die if I loose her._

"No, we'll keep the Fear Simulations for sure."

"I wonder if we'll be able to return to the old way after all this is over", Lauren says thoughtfully.

"If there's a faction left after all this is over," Lynn says, pointing out the obvious.

"Don't tell me you're going to eat a mashed-potato sandwich," Tris says as she watches Lynn fill a roll with mashed potatoes.

"So what if I am?"

A group of Dauntless pass by our table, and I suddenly hear "coward" being whispered all around me. At first I'm confused, then I realize that they're all talking to me. I tense up, anger and frustration welling up inside me.

"What idiots. And the Candor, for making you spill your life story for everyone to see . . . they're idiots too", Lauren says in an attempt to comfort me. It doesn't work.

But I know what will. Searching through the room, I quickly find my father in the room.

"This needs to stop," I say. I get up from the table and hurry toward my father. I know that I need to be fast about this. I. Can't. Hesitate.

I reach him in a couple of seconds, avoiding tables and people easily, and I push him off his seat. As he opens his mouth to speak, I throw a punch. I feel his teeth cut into my fist, but the adrenaline pumping through me numbs the pain. Besides, it hurt him way more than it hurt me.

I move toward the open space in the middle of the room, pulling Marcus harshly with me. I throw him to the ground, holding him down with my foot as I take off my belt.

"This is for your own good", I say, and it is an echo of all the hundreds of times I've heard him say it in my old Abnegation house. It is a reminder of all the pain I've had to suffer from this man, and I'm no longer hesitant about this. Anger has consumed me, yet still, my thoughts are clear. I'm very well aware of why I'm doing this and why I can't let myself spiral out of control.

I whip my belt through the air and it lands on Marcus's arm, leaving a red mark.

Then I strike him in the back, lifting my hand to do it again, thinking that maybe I'll hit him in the face this time…

"Stop!" a voice calls out as a small hand land on my shoulder. "Tobias, stop right now!"

I look up and meet Tris eyes. They're wide with emotion. I don't know if it's from fear or shock, but I don't have time to find out.

I quickly pull out a silver chain connected to a ring and throw it next to my father's body. "My mother says hello", I say through clenched teeth, and then I leave the room.

I stop right outside the door and take a few deep breaths before I start walking again. I'm surprised by how much it hurt me mentally to do this.

Suddenly, Tris catches up to me again. "What was that?"

"It was necessary", I say, looking away from her as I wait for the elevator.

I know this wasn't pretty to watch. I'd preferred if she hadn't seen it, but I hadn't really had a choice. This needed to be done for all the Dauntless to start respecting me again. And I _need_ them to respect me.

"Necessary for what?"

"What, you're feeling sorry for him now? Do you know how many times he did that to me? How do you think I learned the moves?"

My voice is loud and harsh, and I know I shouldn't lash out at her like this, but my emotions are still raging inside me and they're hard to control.

"No," Tris says, and her voice is low and weak. "No, I don't feel sorry for him, not at all."

"Then what, Tris? You haven't cared about what I do or say for the past week; what's so different about this?"

I expect her to bring up my conversation with Evelyn again, or try to turn this against me. But she doesn't.

"Nothing," she just says.

That's when the elevator arrives. I hurry inside and press the button to close the doors before she can come along.

I look up half a second before she disappears behind the doors, and the familiarity of her face calms me down a bit. I start to feel guilty for being so hard on her, but I shake the feeling away.

Instead, as the doors close and separate us from each other, I feel empty. I'm constantly surrounded by people here, yet sometimes I just feel so lonely. Right now, all I have is the deal I made with myself. And for that I needed to earn my respect back. I may not like it, but this had to be done.


	23. Ears are Listening

I wake up early the next day and sit with Zeke and Uriah for breakfast. They're talking about their plans to eavesdrop on Jeanine and Kang's meeting with excited, low voices.

"You're coming with, right, Four?" Uriah asks me.

The question surprises me. "Um, I don't know. I wasn't really planning to…"  
"Oh. I just thought, since Tris is going and all", Uriah says with a shrug.

I freeze. "What?"

"She's coming with", Uriah says, a confused expression on his face. "She didn't tell you?"  
"No, she didn't", I mumble, looking down at the table with my thoughts racing.

_Dangerous, dangerous_… the word keeps popping up in my head, along with that bad feeling.

"She'll be okay, Four", Zeke says. "We'll be careful."

"Yeah", I say, shaking my head slightly. "So, I guess I'm coming along."  
Zeke grins. "Just like old times, then."

I smile a little, reminded of small "adventures" we had when we were Dauntless initiates. That's not why I'm coming along though. It's because this is so much bigger than our small adventures, if you can even call it that, and much more dangerous. This, if we were to be caught, could be risking our lives. And I can't stand the thought of possibly loosing Tris. The only way for me to make sure that I won't, is to come along. Although that won't stop me from trying to talk her out of it.

**** (pagebreak)

On my way out of the cafeteria I bump into Christina.

"Hey, do you know where Tris is?" I ask, grabbing her arm to stop her walking.

She breaks free immediately and takes a step back. "I don't know", she mumbles, not meeting my eyes. Then she rushes past me into the cafeteria.

"I think I saw her in the bathroom", a voice says, and I turn around to see Lynn, who apparently heard our- or should I say my, conversation.

She tilts her head toward where Christina just disappeared and shrugs. "She'll get over it eventually. It's just… Tris waited so long to say it. And what a way to find out, huh?"

"Yeah, but she didn't exactly have a choice", I say in Tris's defense. "She did what she had to do."

"I know that", Lynn says, and with another shrug she disappears into the cafeteria.

But she was right. I do find Tris in the bathroom on the floor that was apparently made Dauntless-only.

"Tris?" I call out while standing outside the door, knocking slightly on the door. I give her a couple of seconds before opening the door.  
She stands in the corner of the bathroom, a gun on the floor next to her.

"Zeke and Uriah told me you were going to eavesdrop on Jack", I say.

"Oh." She doesn't say anything else.

"Are you?"

"Why should I tell you?" Tris says harshly. "You don't tell me about your plans."

I frown. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about beating Marcus to a pulp in front of all the Dauntless for no apparent reason. But there is a reason, isn't there?" She says as she comes closer, sounding upset. "Because it's not like you lost control; it's not like he did something to provoke you, so there has to be a reason!"

"I needed to prove to the Dauntless that I am not a coward", I say, trying to sound genuine. "That's all. That's all it was."

"Why would you need to-" Tris starts, but interrupts herself. She doesn't continue for several moments, so I decide to speak up.

"So are you going to eavesdrop or not?"

"What does it matter?" Tris says, avoiding the question.

"You're throwing yourself into danger for no reason again. Just like when you stormed up to fight the Erudite with only a… a pocket knife to protect yourself."

"There is a reason", Tris protests. " A good one. We won't know what's going on unless we eavesdrop, and we need to know what's going on."

She looks so tired and vulnerable in that moment when she looks at me, and I cross my arms to keep from reaching out to comfort her. I try to look stern.

"You're not cutting your hair like the Abnegation anymore", Tris points out. Damn, she's observant. "That because you want to look more Dauntless?"

"Don't change the subject", I say, not letting her turn this on me. "There are four people going to eavesdrop already. You don't need to be there."

"Why are you so insistent on me staying home? I am not the kind of person who just sits back and lets other people take all the risks!" Her loud voice echoes in the room.

"As long as you are someone who doesn't seem to value her own life," I say quietly, "someone who can't even pick up and fire a gun… You should sit back and let other people take the risks."

"What are you going to do? Lock me in the bathroom?" She says fiercely. "Because that's the only way you'll be able to keep me from going."

Frustrated, I put my hand to my forehead. "I don't want to stop you. I want to you stop yourself. But if you're going to be reckless, you can't prevent me from coming along."

She studies my face for a couple of seconds, and then she shrugs. "Fine."

I nod. "Okay."

She gives me one last look before walking out of the bathroom, leaving the gun on the floor. I sigh, pick it up and put it in my pocket. Could be useful.

*** (pagebreak)

The walk to the bridge where Jack Kang and the representative of Jeanine Matthews are meeting is silent. Nobody speaks, but the tension is still obvious. When it's time to climb the metal structures next to the bridge, it's obvious that Tris is still not completely healed from the gun shot in her shoulder. Uriah and Zeke are keeping watch from buildings on opposite sides of the bridge, so we're only four trying to climb the bridge. Shauna and Lynn does it easily, but Tris struggles. I keep an eye on her as we climb down to the girders under the bridge, where we'll sit and listen to the voices that'll be above us.

Tris crouches and crawls along one of the girders under the bridge, but she has to support herself by holding onto another girder further away from the one she sits on with her injured arm. I position myself on one of the girders close to her, my length allowing my legs to reach her girder so that she can lean against them instead. She smiles gratefully at me, and I try to smile back. But I'm still a little mad about her even putting us in this situation at all, although I know I can't blame her entirely.

We're a little early, so we wait in silence until it's finally seven o'clock. That's when Jeanine's representative speaks up.

"Hello, Jack", says Max.


	24. Love or Sacrifice

"Max", says Jack, sounding surprised. "Where's Jeanine? I thought she would at least have the courtesy to show up herself."

"Jeanine and I divide our responsibilities according to our strengths. That means I make all military decision", Max explains. "I believe that includes what we are doing today."

"Fine. I came to-"  
"I should inform you that this will not be a negotiation", Max says, interrupting Jack. "In order to negotiate, you have to be on even footing, and you, Jack, are not."  
"What do you mean?" Jack says, sounding slightly insulted.

"I mean that you are the only disposable faction. Candor does not provide us with protection, sustenance, or technological innovation. Therefore you are expendable to us. And you have not done much to win the favor of your Dauntless guests, so you are completely vulnerable and completely useless. I recommend, therefore, that you do exactly as I say.

"You piece of scum", Jack says, and I don't need to see his face to know how disgusted he is. "How dare-"

"Now let's not get testy", says Max.

Tris suddenly turns her head, meeting my eyes. She points at her ear, then up at the bridge. I frown.

Listen, and… Max? Max is listening to something? To Jeanine? If he is, that means that she's within a certain distance for her radio signal to reach Max…

And then it hits me. Jeanine is here, close-by.

I nod at Tris, trying to say that I think I know what she's figured out.

"I have three requirements. First, that you return the Dauntless leader you currently hold in captivity unharmed", Max says, and I'm guessing he's referring to Eric. "Second, that you allow your compound to be searched by our soldiers so that we can extract the Divergent; and third, that you provide us with the names of those who were not injected with the simulation serum."

"Why? What are you searching for?" Jack asks. "And why do you need those names? What do you intend to do with them?"

"The purpose of our search would be to locate and remove any of the Divergent from the premises. And as for the names, that is none of your concern."

"None of my concern!" Jack bursts out, his voice filled with anger. I hear rapid footsteps above me.

"Release me", Max says calmly, "Or I will order my guards to fire."

Tris suddenly moves next to me, starting to climb back off the bridge. I follow her, not quite sure what she's up to.

That's when Lynn heaves herself onto the bridge, a gun in her hand, and fires at Max. The bullet hit him in the chest.

Tris notices it too and drops down from the bridge, landing in the mud a couple of feet below us, and I shortly follow her, and so does Lynn and Shauna. We hurry toward a concrete wall of the bridge where we take cover from the bullets raining down at us. I stand in front of Tris, covering her body with mine. I feel my chest tight with fear, and I try to take deep breaths. She's already been shot once. I won't let it happen again.

But then she suddenly breaks free and starts running again, away from the only cover we have, and up the stairs toward Wacker Drive. I realize that she's looking for Jeanine.

I follow her immediately, trying to ignore the anger that burns inside of me because she didn't choose to run for safety but decided to risk her life yet again.

We close in on the glass building with rapid speed, reaching an alleyway just as three other people reach the other side of it. I immediately recognize two of them as Peter and Jeanine.

"Peter!" Tris shouts, her voice full of rage. Peter stops, although Jeanine and the other Dauntless traitor disappears around a corner. Tris immediately moves forward to stop them, but I reach out and grab hold of her shoulder, keeping her from running to what surely would be her death.

_How can she be so stupid?!_ A small, panicked voice inside my head wonders.

But then Peter lifts his gun, pointing it at Tris, and we both lift ours at the same time.

"You traitor. I knew it." Tris spits the words out. "I knew it."

My blood runs cold as a high-pitched scream suddenly echoes through the building, cutting through my ears like a sharp knife. I think I recognized the voice as Shauna's.

"Sounds like your friends need you, so you have a choice", Peter says, a cruel smile on his face. "You can let us go, and help them, or you can die trying to follow us."

He doesn't look worried at all- he knows what we will choose.

Tris clenches her teeth together, but I know that she's finally realized what the right thing to do is.

"I hope you die", she says as we back up, turn and run.

We keep running until we're back at the bridge where we took cover, only to find Shauna on the ground in a pool of blood. Lynn's sitting next to her, eyes blank.

"It's my fault", she whispers. "I shouldn't have shot him. I shouldn't have…"

I crouch, ignoring Lynn and instead feeling Shauna's neck for a pulse. I nod; It's weak, but it's there.

"We've got to get her out of here", I say, turning toward Lynn. "Lynn, look at me. I'm going to carry her, and it's going to hurt her a lot, but it's our only option."

She'll be heavy, and I won't be able to lift her safely if Lynn starts to protest. But she only nods.

I reach in under Shauna's body, lifting her from the ground as carefully as possible. Tris helps me pull her up over my shoulder, and Shauna moans in pain.

She's heavy to carry, but I know that I'm the strongest one here so I push through it, breathing heavily as we walk toward the Merciless Mart. We walk for a while in silence and I focus on the sound of our footsteps instead of the weight on my shoulder.

As we get closer I suddenly see Uriah hurrying toward us. "Hey!" He calls out. "Zeke had to help them get Jack-" He stops abruptly as he sees Shauna's limp body over my shoulder. "Oh no. Oh no. Shauna?"

"Now's not the time", I say, making my voice stern. "Run back to the Merciless Mart and get a doctor."  
Uriah stays where he is.

"Uriah! Go, now!"

My voice echoes loudly in the empty area, and Uriah seems to come to his senses, because he turns and starts running back the way he came from.

Nobody speaks as we walk the rest of the way, my shoulder aching from Shauna's weight. I clench my jaw and keep walking, taking one step at the time until we finally reach the building.

Uriah waits for us inside the doors, an Erudite man and Cara with him. They have a bed prepared for Shauna, and I put her down as gently as possible and let them work to save her life.

I guide Tris a few steps away from Shauna's bed. "I'm not going to pretend to know what's going on with you", I say to her. "But if you senselessly risk your life again-"

"I am not senselessly risking my life", Tris protests. "I am trying to make sacrifices, like my parents would have, like-"

"You are not your parents. You are a sixteen-year-old girl-"

"How dare you-" Tris says angrily, trying to interrupt, but I keep talking.

"-who doesn't understand that the value of a sacrifice lies in its necessity, not in throwing your life away! And if you do that again, you and I are done."

I press my lips together, try to ignore the pain that comes with those words. I don't want to do this any more than she does.

"You're giving me an ultimatum?" Tris says, her eyes blank with tears.

"No, I'm telling you a fact", I say, shaking my head. "If you throw yourself into danger for no reason again, you will have become nothing more than a Dauntless adrenaline junkie looking for a hit, and I'm not going to help you do it. I love Tris the Divergent, who makes decisions apart from faction loyalty, who isn't some faction archetype. But the Tris who's trying as hard as she can to destroy herself… I can't love her."

She doesn't say anything, but I can see her hands shake as she grabs her shirt.

I lean closer to her, closing my eyes and taking in her familiar scent. "I believe you're in there. Come back." Our lips touch as I speak and I briefly press a kiss to her lips before walking away from her, returning to Shauna's side. I suddenly realise how heavily I'm breathing and try to calm down.

"How is she?" I ask the Erudite doctor.

He shakes his head. "She'll survive, but I don't think she'll ever be able to move her legs again."  
Cara gasps, covering her mouth with her hand. I can see tears in her eyes, but I look away. I've known Shauna for two years now, for my entire life in Dauntless, and it's hard to see her like this. Instead, I glance over to where Tris was just standing, but she's gone. I sigh. There's not much I can do now, just hope that she'll realise that she's too important to die, that her love for me is stronger than any urge she has to risk her life repeatedly.


	25. Honestly truthful

Maybe half an hour later I'm forced to leave Shauna's side. The Erudite Doctor promises to take her to the hospital wing and make sure she's cared about.

I let my feet walk wherever they want to, because I don't really care where i'm going. I just need to clear my head.

Eventually I bump into Bud in one of the hallways.

"Four!" he calls out. "We've been looking everywhere for you."

"Why?" I ask. "What's going on?"  
"Tori's calling a meeting for the Dauntless only. I'm not sure what it's about, but you need to get to the sleeping area."

"Okay, I will," I say. "What's the meeting about?"

He shrugs. "I don't know. I just know it's important. Anyway, I have to go get the rest of the Dauntless."  
"All right. I'll see you there?" I ask.

He nods, starting to walk away.

"Oh, and Four?" Bud says, walking backwards in the opposite direction. "It's a secret. Don't tell any non-Dauntless."  
"Yeah, of course not", I say. "Got it."

When I get to the room with the bunk beds, almost all the Dauntless are already there, scattered amongst the bunks. I see Tris out of the corner of my eye, but avoid looking at her and choose to lean against one of the bunks further away from her. Bud arrives a couple of minutes later with the last of the Dauntless he could find, and Tori speaks up, sitting on a chair in the middle of the room with her bandaged leg stretched out in front of her.

"So, I've been informed about recent events that are risking the life of not only Divergents, but also several Dauntless, and that Jack Kang is not willing to do much to save those lives. But we don't have that many left of us, so we need to try and protect the ones still loyal to our faction."

I only listen to her with one ear, my mind still on the events of today. I cross my arms to keep my hands from shaking and stare at the floor as my thoughts race.

I'd been so afraid to loose her in the moments following Lynn's impulsive move. But she doesn't understand the fear and pain it causes _me_ when she does reckless things- like run for Jeanine instead of shelter. No matter how I keep telling her to be careful and not run into dangerous situations without thinking, she keeps risking her life in attempts be selfless and brave.

I hear Tori and Tris discuss something, but I choose not to listen.

No matter how much it hurt to give Tris that "ultimatum", if you can even call it that, it was the only way to get _my _Tris back. The Tris that's controlling the balance between selflessness and bravery- not the one acting without any self-preservation to save everyone else but her.

"If Jack Kang is making deals with the Erudite, we can't stay here", says Tori, her words suddenly penetrating my thoughts. "So where can we go?"

For me, there's only one answer to that question. Only one place to go.

"Home", I say. "We should take back what's our. We can break the security cameras in Dauntless headquarters so the Erudite can't see us. We should go home."

There's a moment of silence before several people in the room start to cheer and shout encouraging words, and it's clear that we all agree- as a faction that from now on will be able to stand on it's own feet again.

"But before that," Bud says, "we need to decide what to do about Eric. To let him stay here with the Erudite, or to execute him."

"Eric is Dauntless. That means we decide what happens to him. Not Candor." This time it's Lauren talking, and our eyes meet we both smile a little. I haven't talked to her in a long time, since before the attack on Abnegation. I have no idea what she went through.

The room erupts into cheering again, and it's nice to know that we all agree and feel the same way about Eric.

"According to Dauntless law," says Tori, "only Dauntless leaders can perform an execution. All five of our former leaders are Dauntless traitors, so I think it's time we pick new ones. The law says we need more than one, and we need an odd number. If you've got suggestions, you should shout them out now, and we'll vote if we need to."

_Shout them out. _I can't help but smile a little at her words. It's so Dauntless, shouting out the suggestions, and it feels so much like home.

"You!" somebody suddenly shouts, nominating Tori. A few people cheer, agreeing.

"Okay. Anyone else?" Tori asks.

Then somebody calls out; "Tris!"

I search the room and find the shout coming from Marlene. Not to my surprise, a lot of other people support the nomination with their shouts.

Harrison also gets nominated by a Dauntless woman I don't know. And then Tori says, not really to my surprise either; "I'm going to nominate Four."

Mixed reactions to that, but I don't really care.

"We only need three leaders", says Tori. "We'll have to vote."

I look at Tris. I'm not sure what I want her to do.

I know why I need my spot as a leader, even though I don't really want it, and Tori will make a good leader. She deserves it. So it's between Tris and Harrison.

Something tells me that Tris being on the council will only make her feel more responsible for what happens to everyone, and that's what I want her to feel less of. Less responsibility to sacrifice herself for everybody else. And she must have seen it in my eyes, because she suddenly says; "No. No, you don't have to vote. I refuse my nomination."

"Are you sure, Tris?" Tori asks hesitantly.

"Yes. I don't want it. I'm sure."

"Alright then. The new leaders will be Harrison, Four, and myself", Tori announces. Nobody protests, instead, people shout and cheer and pump their fists. And finally, we can be our own faction again.

That's when some kind of alarm rings through the speakers.

"Attention all occupants of Candor headquarters", Kang's voice say through the speakers. "A few hours ago I met with a representative of Jeanine Matthew. He reminded me that we Candor are in a weak position, dependent on Erudite for our survival, and told me that if I intend to keep my faction free, I will have to meet a few demands. In order to comply with these demands, I ask that everyone make their way to the Gathering Place to report whether you have an implant or not."

I frown, but I guess that being honest about what happened is part of the role as Candor's leader. No lies, no avoiding the truth.

"The Erudite have also ordered all Divergent to be turned over to Erudite", Kang continues. "I do not know for what purpose."  
And then the announcement's over.

**Hey y'all! Hope you liked this chapter. Please leave a review telling me what you thought, and also, have you seen the movie yet?! I haven't but I will soon… If you've seen it please tell me what you thought, but NO SPOILERS! ;) **


	26. Execution

A couple of minutes after the announcement ends, most of the Dauntless who attended our meeting leave the room and somehow manages to break Eric free from his cell and bring him to the room where Tris and I were both interrogated. We all gather around the chair he's tied to, and even though there are a lot of people in the room, he chooses to stare at me with a cold smile on his face, even though he must know we'll never let him go unpunished.

"Would you like me to tell you your crimes?" Tori says, her voice cold. "Or would you like to list tem yourself?"

Eric's eyes sweep around the room before he answers, searching for someone. Then his eyes finally land on Tris. "I'd like her to list them. Since she's the one who stabbed me, clearly she is familiar with them."

Always. He's always had his eyes on her, ever since I started to care for her. Or maybe it was even before that, because she was only "a Stiff " to him yet she was so brave, so Dauntless. And still is. Which is why_ I_ will always stop him from getting to her. I'm aware that he cannot possibly hurt her physically, but it is his words that I dread.

"Leave her out of this", I say sharply.  
"Why? Because you're doing her?" Eric retorts. "Oh wait, I forgot. Stiffs don't do that sort of thing. They just tie each other's shoes and cut each other's hair."  
I keep my expression calm as emotions rage inside of me. I'm mad, of course, because he even dares bring our relationship up, but I'm also victorious, because he's so wrong. He doesn't know a thing about us; about Tris and I. We've had our moments. Nothing is "stiff" between us.

"I want her to list them", Eric says again as I do not reply.

I open my mouth to say all the things I will do to him if he doesn't shut up, but Tris's voice interrupt me; "You conspired with Erudite. You are responsible for the deaths of hundreds of Abnegation."

I study her face as she speaks but it's emotionless; unreadable. Yet I can see the rage burn behind her eyes as she looks at Eric.

"You betrayed Dauntless", she continues, and her at first so controlled voice start to shake slightly with anger. "You shot a child in the head. You are a ridiculous plaything of Jeanine Matthews."

"Do I deserve to die?" Eric asks, his face serious.

I try to interrupt again before Tris says something she might regret, but she's once again faster than me.

"Yes", Tris replies immediately.

"Fair enough", says Eric. "But do you have the right to decide that, Beatrice Prior? Like you decided the fate of that other boy- what was his name? Will?"

Tris flinches as he mentions Will's name, but doesn't say anything. I decide to step in, because right now I can't think of anything other than wanting this over with and him _dead._

"You have committed every crime that warrants execution among the Dauntless", I say. "We have the right to execute you, under the laws of Dauntless."

I bend down, emptying three guns of all their bullets. I pick up one single bullet and put it into the chamber of one of the guns. Then I put them all back down on the floor and spin them around until I can't remember which one has the bullet before handing one to Harrison and one to Tori, keeping the third for myself.

"Wait, I have a request", Eric says as we all lift our guns.

"We don't take requests from criminals", Tori says, still balancing on her uninjured leg.

"I am a leader of Dauntless," Eric says anyway, "and all I want is for Four to be the one who fires that bullet."

"Why?" I ask suspiciously.

"So you can live with the guilt of knowing that you usurped me and then shot me in the head."

"There won't be any guilt", I say without hesitation.

"Then you'll have no problem doing it."

I take a second to think about it, but don't see actually see a problem with it, no possible ulterior motive that he could have.

So I pick up another bullet and load my gun with it.  
"Tell me, because I've always wondered", Eric says, "Is it your daddy who shows up in every fear landscape you've ever gone through?"

I ignore the question, lifting my gun

"You didn't like that question? What, afraid the Dauntless are going to change their minds about you?" Eric says with a smirk. "Realize that even though you've only got four fears, you're still a coward?"

His smirk disappears, as my expression remains neutral. He takes a deep breath, sitting straighter up in his chair. He must've finally realized that this is where it ends for him.

"Eric", I say. "Be brave."

And I pull the trigger.

The bullet hits him right between the eyes, so his death is quick. The blood immediately pours down his face and all over his body, creating a pool under the chair. Even though it's Eric and I wanted nothing more than him dead, I have to look away. I'm not that cruel, to be able to enjoy death.

People leave the room after a couple of minutes, hurrying toward the doors and whispering in hushed voices. Marlene is guiding Tris toward one of the exits, so I hurry after them, placing a hand on Tris's back. Her face is pale and she doesn't react to my touch.

Just as the crowd of people reach the doors they open from the outside, and Jack Kang followed by a few other Candor members look over the crowd suspiciously.

"What have you done?" Jack says. "I was just told that Eric is missing form his holding cell."

"He was under our jurisdiction", Tori replies. "We gave him a trial and executed him. You should be thanking us."

"Why… Why should I be thanking you?" Jack asks, his face red with either embarrassment or anger, I can't tell which.

"Because you wanted him to be executed, too, right?" says Tori, innocently. "Since he murdered one of your children? Well, we took care of it for you. And now, if you'll excuse us, we're leaving."

"I can't let you do that", he protests, and I remember that us leaving will prevent him from fulfilling all the demands that were set by the Erudite. And I don't care.

"You don't _let_ us do anything", I say harshly. "If you don't step aside, we will be forced to walk over you instead of past you."  
"Didn't you come here to find allies?" Jack says, clearly outraged. "If you do this, we will side with Erudite, I promise you, and you will never find an ally in us again, you-"

Tori interrupts him. "We don't need you as an ally. We're Dauntless."

And with that, the Dauntless crowd push forward as one, breaking out of the room. Jack Kang and the other Candor are forced to jump aside to not get run over.

We run all the way out the building and I loose Tris in the crowd, but Dauntless headquarters is not far away and I know she'll get there on her own. She's strong and independent- I can't forget that.

Luckily we all grabbed our stuff before going to Eric's execution so nobody has second thoughts before leaving Candor. We're going home.


	27. A Change for Good or Bad

**Sorry it took me so long to update! But I now have a couple of chapters prepared that I will post in the next few days. I'm so thankful that you guys haven't given up on me or this story. I promise that I'll finish this story, so don't think that I've quit. It might take time but we'll get through it! 3 Anyways, here you go! **

Later that evening, when everybody's settled back into their Dauntless homes, I'm in the cafeteria, sitting alone by a table. There's no food available so not many people are here, and the lights are all out, so I'm sitting in almost complete darkness. But I don't mind. It helps me think.

Not that we're finally back where we belong… I can finally start to become a Dauntless leader. I will at last be able to earn the respect I will need to unite Dauntless and factionless in a war against the Erudite.

I suddenly remember Eric's words earlier today, about my fear landscape and about my father. When I think about Marcus now… I don't feel the same fear I used to. I feel… disconnected from him, from the life we had in Abnegation. And I've never quite been able to distance myself from that life until now. It feels good. Yet I can't help but wonder about my fear landscape… Will I finally be rid of that fear? Or will something else have replaced it?

So I get up and head toward the room that I know so well, the room I've been in and experienced my worst fear an uncountable number of times. When I walk into the Pit, still standing in the shadows, I spot Tris standing by the chasm. I think about going over there to talk to her, but then Zeke appears and they start talking about something that I'm too far away to hear.

"Tobias", a voice whispers from the tunnel to my right.

I turn, startled, looking for whoever whispered my name. Who other than Tris would possibly call me _Tobias?_

And then I see her. Evelyn.

I hurry into the tunnel where she's standing.

"What are you doing here?" I whisper, looking around anxiously.

"It's okay, I won't be long", she says in a low voice. "I just wanted to inform you that we're accepting your offer about the meeting. You need to catch the train that leaves from here tonight at five past eight, and we'll be there five minutes later."

"Good. Just remember, I told you that I don't want to-"

"I know what you told me", Evelyn interrupts me. "But I also know that you've gone out of your way to earn your respect back among the Dauntless, and I don't think that is because you care so much about your reputation."

I sigh. Of course she knows. Of course she's aware that I've already begun to put the plan in motion. "Okay, I'll be there, but only if Tris can come too."

She eyes me suspiciously for a moment, then lifts a shoulder. "Sure. I don't see why not."

After she's left, I smile a little, satisfied that she figured it out. I had left a note over by the train tracks when we first got back here, knowing that Evelyn- or her patrols or spies or whatever you want to call them- would find it. It only had four words written on it; "I want to meet." I hoped that they'd either figure out that the number of words where the same as my nickname, or that she'd somehow recognize my handwriting. On the back I wrote "To Mother", as another clue. It felt weird, calling her that, but I couldn't write something obvious that revealed the name of the receiver nor the sender. It was actually pretty similar to the coded message she had sent me about a year ago, finally revealing that she wasn't dead.

My mind's still reeling from the meeting with my mother when I enter the simulation room, reckoning that I still have time to go through my fear landscape before the train leaves. I find a syringe and easily inject myself with the serum for my fear landscape, like I've done so many times before. I sit back in a chair and my surroundings suddenly disappear. The familiar ledge appears, and I'm once again standing at the edge of it, staring several thousand feet down at the ground with harsh wind in my back. My heart starts to race immediately, but I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and jump.

Right before I hit the ground, the scenery changes and I'm on land again. I see the familiar walls rise around me and I clench my fists together as they close in on me. Breathing heavily I focus on trying to make the walls come closer, but I'm too panicked to do it. So I give up on that and try to calm myself down instead. I relax my fists, lean back and focus on my breathing, remembering when Tris was here and she told me to breath like her. The thought of her helps me calm down and the walls fall away again. I expect to see the same woman and the same gun, but instead I find Tris sitting in the middle of the room.

"Tris?" I say, running toward her. But something stops me- a glass wall. I bang my fists against the glass, but it won't break.

I suddenly see a man standing next to her, his face covered in shadows as he uses the back of his gun to hit her in the jaw, hard. Tris screams in pain and I smash my fists against the wall again, trying to get through to her and stop this man from hurting her. With this rage and fear burning inside me I can think of nothing else but breaking his fingers to stop him from ever touching her again.

"Four", Tris says and her voice is weak, her face contorted with fear and pain. "Help me."

But then the man presses the barrel of his gun against her forehead.

"No!" I scream, but I'm too late. The man pulls the trigger.

Tris's body slump to the ground in a pool of blood as the glass wall suddenly disappears behind my hands. I stumble over to where Tris is lying, her face pale and still.

"Oh my god", I cry out. "No! Tris, please, wake up…"

I shake my head repeatedly, letting my shaking hand run through her hair then touch her cheek because she can't possibly be dead, this can't be real…

And suddenly it hits me. She called me _Four._ She hasn't done that in a very long time, so why now?

_It's a simulation_, I suddenly remember. That's why. And this _isn't_ real.

I get up shakily, taking a few deep breaths and turning away from her body.

_This isn't real. I need to calm down._

But the image of Tris's dead body flashes before my eyes and my knees give up under me. I cover my face with my palms, not letting myself cry.

I breathe in, breathe out… Inhale, exhale repeatedly until I feel my heart rate slow down and the scenery changes. I spin around but Tris's body is already gone. Instead, my father is walking toward me again.

"I might not be able to touch you again", Marcus hisses, "but that doesn't mean you do not know that I've been right all this time."

I shake my head. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Everything I have ever done has only been for your own good, Tobias, because I always knew you were a coward. I tried to fix you, but just look at you know. I clearly failed, because you're a _coward, _Tobias." He spits the word out like it's poisonous, and his eyes glare at me with a tint of red in them.

"You're wrong", I say, but my voice is weak.

"You will never deserve the title _Dauntless_", my father snorts. "You'll never deserve a brave, selfless girl like Tris."  
Ouch. My heart squeezes as I let his words get to me, as I allow myself to actually consider if he could be right. But at the same time, I'm filled with anger. He shouldn't have brought up Tris; that was a low blow.

"Well," I say fiercely, stepping closer to him. "You might have failed in making me Dauntless, but Tris didn't. With her, I am more brave- more selfless, than ever. She's making me a better person then you ever could."

With rage burning inside of me, I pull my arm back and smash my fist into his face with all of my strength, letting all my built-up anger go with that one punch.

And then Marcus suddenly disappears and I find myself sitting in the simulation room again. I try to take control of my rapid breathing before making my way back to the Pit. Even though I'm aware that the simulation's not real, it _felt_ so, so real. All I know right now is that I need to see Tris.


	28. Clouded

I find Tris in the cafeteria, sitting at a table with Zeke, Christina, Hector, Uriah and Marlene. I had expected Hector's sister to be there too, but Lynn is nowhere to be seen.

Tris's blonde head gives me some of my strength back as I walk toward them. She's alive and well, just like I knew deep down but forgot in the simulation.

"Four!" Zeke says as he notices me approaching their table. "C'mere, there's room."

"Sorry", I say, placing my hand on Tris's shoulder, careful to put it on the good one. "I can't stay."

I _want _to stay, to just sit down and have a normal conversation for once; to just forget all our problems if even just for a moment. But I can't ignore Evelyn's meeting. It truly sounded like something important.

So instead I lean down, closer to Tris's head.

"Can I borrow you for a while?" I ask her in a low voice.

She nods, gets up and says goodbye to the people by the table.

"Where are we going?" she says as we leave the cafeteria.

"The train", I reply. "I have a meeting, and I want you there to help me read the situation."

"Why do you need me to-"

"Because you're better at it than I am." I say it without hesitation. I've seen her read people and situations like no one else. She's amazingly good at understanding how other people think and feel.

"Did you go through your fear landscape today?" Tris asks as we pass through the simulation room I was just in a couple of minutes ago.

"What makes you say that?" I say, instead of admitting that she's right. I don't want her to ask why. _I'm _not even sure why I went in there in the first place.

"Your knuckles are cut up and someone's been using that room."

I realize that we must've walked past the simulation room after leaving the cafeteria.

I sigh.

"This is exactly what I mean. You're far more perceptive than most", I say, slightly amused. Then I look down at my watch and realize that we need to hurry. "They told me to catch the one leaving at 8:05. Come on."

We leave the Dauntless building, stepping outside into the warm air. It's still light out and the sunset has colored the entire sky orange.

"Perceptive enough to know you're evading the question," Tris says.

I sigh again, knowing it's time to give up. It's not easy, hiding something from Tris.

"Yes, I went through my fear landscape. I... wanted to see if it had changed."

"And it has. Hasn't it?"

I look away from her, remembering the simulation where she died.

"Yes," I say. "But the number is still the same."

Suddenly the train arrives, honking. The train cars are dark, the lights are off for some reason, like as if to attract as little attention as possible.

"Fifth car back!" I call out to Tris and we start running next to the train.

She jumps at the fifth opening in the train before me, but isn't able to pull herself all the way into the car. Her legs remain outside of the car, dangling far too close to the wheels, but with a final pull she manages to swing her legs inside of the car. She grimaces as I jump in after her, clutching her knee.

"Here, let me see," I say. She removes her hands and I roll her jeans up, ignoring the tingling of her skin against mine.

Her knee is bleeding, but it's just a scrape wound and it doesn't look deep.

"It's shallow", I say. It'll heal quickly."

She nods, lying back on the floor.

She's quiet for a moment, before asking; "So is he still in your fear landscape?"

She doesn't need to clarify whom she's talking about. Anger wells up inside of me as I think of my father's words in the simulation. "Yes. But not in the same way."

Then the image of her dead body flashes through my head.

"You're in it, though", I continue, frowning at the painful memory. "Instead of having to shoot that woman, like I used to, I have to watch you die. And there's nothing I can do to stop it."

Those feelings return to me, everything I felt in the simulation when she died. Fear, anger, pain. When I saw her body, and all the blood… I felt like I was drowning. I couldn't breathe.

My hands shake as I check the time. "They'll be here any minute."

Tris rises from the floor just as the train passes a group of factionless, including Evelyn. They jump into our train car without any trouble.

"Hello," my mother says to me after jumping into the car.

"Nice meeting location," I say instead of greeting her.

"It seemed safest," says Evelyn. "So you wanted to meet."

"Yes. I'd like to discuss an alliance."

"An alliance," Edward says, like the word is new to him. "And who gave you the authority to do that?"

"He's a Dauntless leader," Tris points out. "He has the authority."

Edward seems surprised, but my mother doesn't. She seems to know everything.

"Interesting," she says simply before turning her eyes toward Tris. "And is she also a Dauntless leader?"

"No," I say. "She's here to help me decide whether or not to trust you."

Tris smiles at my mother, but it's not exactly a heart-warming smile. Evelyn ignores her.

"We will, of course, agree to an alliance . . . under a certain set of conditions," she says. "A guaranteed—and equal—place in whatever government forms after Erudite is destroyed, and full control over Erudite data after the attack. Clearly—"

Tris interrupts Evelyn before she can finish. "What are you going to do with the Erudite data?"

"Obviously we will destroy it", she responds calmly. "The only way to deprive the Erudite of power is to deprive them of knowledge."

I think about it, trying to look at things from every perspective.

"What would we receive in return, under those terms?" I ask her.

"Our much-needed manpower, in order to take Erudite headquarters, and an equal place in government, with us." Her words sound mechanical, planned. Like they have been rehearsed or prepared.

"I am sure that Tori would also request the right to rid the world of Jeanine Matthews," I say, remembering her words to me as we were walking home from Candor.

_I want the Erudite to be stopped, of course, but please. If you can… make sure I get to be the one to kill Jeanine Matthews. It would truly make my life a lot better._

She had spat the name out like she was disgusted just to mention it.

"I'm sure that could be arranged," my mother says. "I don't care who kills her; I just want her dead."

No matter how I turn things around in my head, I can't find anything negative about this deal. I glance at Tris in case she had thought of something I haven't, but she doesn't look hesitant or even shake her head- she just looks thoughtful.

So I turn toward Evelyn again, extending my hand to her. "Then we are agreed."

"We should convene in a week's time", she says, shaking my hand. "In neutral territory. Most of the Abnegation have graciously agreed to let us stay in their sector of the city to plan as they clean up the aftermath of the attack."

"Most of them", I repeat, not quite sure I want to hear what I expect her to say.

"I'm afraid your father still commands the loyalty of many of them, and he advised them to avoid us when he came to visit a few days ago", Evelyn says with a bitter smile, although no other emotion show on her face. "And they agreed, just as they did when he persuaded them to exile me."

"They exiled you? I thought you left."

"No, the Abnegation were inclined toward forgiveness and reconciliation, as you might expect. But your father has a lot of influence over the Abnegation, and he always has. I decided to leave rather than face the indignity of public exile."

This new information surprises me. It changes the way I look at her now. Maybe she's not as cold as I suspected her to be. Maybe her leaving me with Marcus wasn't entirely her own choice…

"It's time!" Edward suddenly calls out. I hadn't even noticed him keeping watch out the train opening.

"See you in a week," my mother says to me.

I don't even have time to nod or say it back before she and the other factionless jump off the train again.

When they're all gone, Tris turns toward me again. "Why did you even bring me along, if you were just going to make an alliance anyway?"

I'm surprised by her sudden outburst. I hadn't realized she felt like it was wrong.

"You didn't stop me," I say.

"What was I supposed to do, wave my hands in the air?" she says sarcastically. "I don't like it."

"It has to be done."

"I don't think it does. There has to be another way—"

"What other way?" I ask sternly. "You just don't like her. You haven't since you first met her."

"Obviously I don't like her! She abandoned you!"

"They exiled her. And if I decide to forgive her, you had better try to do it too!" I add. "I'm the one who got left behind, not you."

"This is about more than that. I don't trust her. I think she's trying to use you."

"Well, it isn't for you to decide."

"Why did you bring me, again?" Tris says, folding her arms just like I have. "Oh yeah—so that I could read the situation for you. Well, I read it, and just because you don't like what I decided doesn't mean—"

"I forgot about how your biases cloud your judgment. If I had remembered, I might not have brought you."

She's too caught up with what she thought she knew; too focused on being right. She can't see that my mother might actually have changed.

"My biases", she says with a scowl. "What about your biases? What about thinking everyone who hates your father as much as you do is an ally?"

"This is not about him!"

"Of course it is! He knows things, Tobias. And we should be trying to find out what they are."

"This again?" I say, remembering our conversation in the Amity. "I thought we resolved this. He is a liar, Tris."

"Yeah? Well, so is your mother. You think the Abnegation would really exile someone? Because I don't."

I tense up. "Don't talk about my mother that way."

Tris moves toward the opening of the car, and I see that we're almost home again.

"Fine", Tris says. "I won't."

Then she jumps out of the car. I hurry after her, but she doesn't stop to wait for me. Instead she keeps walking toward the Dauntless building, and I don't bother trying to catch up to her. She obviously doesn't want to talk to me. I just wish we could've resolved this without fighting.


	29. A Different Message

**Oh my god, my recent chapters have suddenly gotten so many views! I'm both surprised and thankful. It makes me really happy to see that people actually enjoy my take on Insurgent from Tobias POV. A big thank you to all you who review on every single chapter. I read through them all and it really motivates me to keep going. So thank you, here's another chapter! 3**

"Four."

I'm awoken by a familiar voice calling out my nickname.

"Four!" Bud says again, shaking me awake.

"What?" I try to say, but it comes out as a mumble so low I'm not sure he heard me.

"Tori and Harrison need you. Dauntless leader meeting. Something… something happened."

The serious look on his face makes me immediately feel a little more awake.

I nod.

Bud waits outside as I quickly get dressed before he escorts me to a conference room. Tori and Harrison are already waiting for me.

"Four", Tori says. "Finally."

"What happened?" I ask.

Bud leaves the room, closing the door quietly behind him, and I realize that this is a meeting solely for the leaders of Dauntless.

"There's been another attack", Harrison replies bitterly. "Only this time, the Erudite didn't have to be here in person to perform it."

"We think Jeanine used the transmitters from the needles to make three kids stand on top of the building and jump off", explains Tori.

Dread fills my body at her words, coldness making me feel numb inside. I clench my fists.

"What happened? Did they..." I can't make myself say the word out loud. _Die._

Tori shakes her head. "Christina and Tris made it onto the roof in time to save two of them. The third one…" she sighs, closing her eyes briefly. "They didn't have time to save the third one. She died."

"Who… who where they?" I say quietly.

"Tris saved Hector and Christina saved a little Candor girl. But Marlene… they couldn't save Marlene."

Marlene. The name feels like a punch to my stomach, and it's suddenly hard to breathe.

She's… dead? That innocent, sweet, Dauntless-born initiate was forced to kill herself, all because Jeanine needs to get what she wants.

I feel sick- this is all so wrong, so twisted.

It suddenly hits me how real and serious this is- this _war_. Because that's what this has to be. No way will either side bow down to the other without a fight.  
"And what is it that Jeanine wants now?" I say, my voice shaking with held-back anger.

Tori hesitates a little before replying. "She… she wants a Divergent to hand themselves over to the Erudite. While Marlene was under the simulation, she said she had a message for the Divergent. Tris wrote it down."

Harrison reaches into his pocket and hands me a small note.

'_This is not a negotiation. It's a warning. Every two days until one of you delivers yourself to Erudite headquarters, this will happen again.'_

I sit down on a chair close to me, my mind reeling. I stare at the small piece of paper, trying to get some control over my thoughts and the emotions burning inside of me.

Anger. Fear. Frustration. But while battling against them, my thoughts go to Tris.

She had to let Marlene die to save Lynn's brother from the same fate. That must've been horrible, choosing between them. And now she knows that the only way to stop it happening again is-

… _until_ _one of you delivers yourself to Erudite headquarters…_

_\- _by handing herself over.

I fly up from my chair.

"I need to go see Tris."

"What?" Harrison says, surprised by my sudden outburst.

"She'll do it. She'll hand herself over unless I stop her", I say, my hands shaking. I have to stop her.

"Okay, calm down. You can talk to her. But", Tori adds, "we need to decide what to do first. Any ideas?"

"Nobody needs to turn themselves over", Harrison says. "We just need to find a way to keep everyone alive, prevent them from killing themselves while under the simulation."

I pull one hand through my hair, suddenly feeling stressed. What if I don't get to her in time?

"Um… we'll increase the security and spread information about the attacks, so that everyone will be keeping an eye out and hopefully stop it happening again", I say. "There's nothing more we can do."  
"Agreed", Tori says.

"Good. Now, do you know where Tris is?"

We find her in the cafeteria. I feel a weight lift of my shoulders as I find her small figure in the crowd. I make my way over there, Tori and Harrison walking a few steps behind me.  
Tris looks up as she sees me approach her table.  
"Hello Tris", I say quietly, sitting down next to her.

"Hi", she says back.

I study her face, searching closely for anything that'll reveal what she's thinking.

"Aren't you going to ask me if I'm all right?" Tris asks me, but her voice sounds mechanical. Like she doesn't really care if I do.

"No, I'm pretty sure you're not alright", I say, shaking my head. I know I sure as hell wouldn't have been if I were in her situation. "I'm going to ask you not to make any decisions until we've talked about it."

"Until we've all talked about it, you mean," Uriah corrects me, "since it involves all of us. I don't think anyone should turn themselves in."

"No one?" Tris says.

"No! I think we should attack back."

"Yeah, let's provoke the woman who can force half of this compound to kill themselves", Tris says sarcastically. "That sounds like a great idea."

"Don't talk about it like that", Uriah mutters, slamming the bottle he just drank from into the table.

"I'm sorry. But you know I'm right", says Tris. "The best way to ensure that half our faction doesn't die is to sacrifice one life."

I feel torn. I know that Tris has a point; one single sacrifice would be the _easiest_ way to prevent even more people from dying. But is it the only way? I don't think so. And I need to convince _her _that.

"Tori and Harrison and I decided to increase security", I say. "Hopefully if everyone is more aware of these attacks, we will be able to stop them. If it doesn't work, then we will think of another solution. End of discussion. But no one is going to do anything yet. Okay?"

I look straight into her eyes, trying to reach out to the reasonable part of her that I know is in there somewhere.

"Okay", Tris says, but her eyes shift away from mine. Meaning that she's not convinced, but worst of all; meaning that she's lying. To her, there's still no better solution than her self-sacrifice.

I decide to let it go for now. I'll talk to her later- soon. But some part of me insists that right now, she just needs some space.


	30. Painfully Alone

Before going back to my room after dinner I decide to quickly stop by the control room. I used to spend so much time in there. But that was another time, and a different me.

A familiar, almost calm feeling sweeps through me as I enter the small room, looking around at all the computer screens. Most of them are black now, since we destroyed the security cameras. I sit down in one of the chairs, letting my fingertips swipe across a keyboard.

It feels as though it has been several years since I last sat here, at the time when my life was a lot simpler, although it has only been a couple of weeks.  
I suddenly catch myself yawning, and I realise that it's time for me to make my way back.

As I open the door to my room, I find Tris on my bed, my quilt in her lap.

Love and frustration mix together as I see her- and I'm angry because she came here, as though she meant to say goodbye. This _can't_ be goodbye.

"Don't be an idiot", I tell her, closing the door behind me but staying by it.

"An idiot?" she says, confused.

"You were lying. You said you wouldn't go to Erudite, and you were lying, and going to Erudite would make you an idiot. So don't."

She rises from my bed, but I can't read her face. We're still too far apart.

"Don't try to make this simple. It's not. You know as well as I do that this is the right thing to do."

_Right for who?!_ I want to scream. Because it's not right for me. This _can't_ possibly be the right thing to do- because that would mean that I loose her. And I don't know how I'd survive that. Why can't she see how wrong her death would be? Why can't she for once be as selfish as she has always claimed that she is?

"You choose this moment to act like the Abnegation?" I demand, anger making my voice loud. "All that time you spent insisting that you were too selfish for them, and now, when your life is on the line, you've got to be a hero? What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with _you?_" she shoots back. "People died. They walked right off the edge of a building! And I can stop it from happening again!"

"You're too important to just… die." I look away from her as I speak; too afraid of breaking down if her bright eyes meet mine.

"I'm not important", Tris protests. "Everyone will do just fine without me."

"Who cares about everyone? What about me?" This time, the desperation in my voice is obvious.

I cover my face with my hand for a moment, taking a deep breath to calm down. Then hurry toward her, leaning down and kissing her. She answers it for a brief moment before pulling away, her hand burning through the fabric of my shirt as she places it against my chest.

"You would be fine. Not at first", Tris says, refusing to look at me. "But you would move on, and do what you have to."

"That's a lie." I press my lips against hers again, my hands on her hips, pulling her closer to me.

She doesn't pull away this time.

Instead, her arms wrap tighter around me, her lips soft against mine. My hand tangles in her hair and her touch sends heat and electricity through my body.

"Promise me, that you won't go." I say quietly, pulling away from her as little as possible. "For me. Do this one thing for me."

She hesitates for a moment, our eyes finally meeting.

"Okay." She doesn't look away this time, but I'm still not convinced.

"Promise", I insist.

"I promise."

We lay in my bed for a long time after that, just touching, kissing and talking a little. It's funny how I don't need much, just her presence to feel calm.

I soon feel myself starting to doze off, my arms around Tris, and so I let myself sleep. I will need the energy for whatever tomorrow brings.

*** (page-break)

_She's gone._

I know it before I even open my eyes. My body feels cold, which can only mean one thing; that my bed is empty. An unbearable pain wraps its claws around my heart as I realize what that means, but I refuse to open my eyes. Maybe as long as they're closed, this isn't my reality.

But the truth is unavoidable. My eyes spring open, staring at the empty space next to me. My body suddenly feels heavy.

"No", I mumble, shaking my head slightly; refusing to believe the obvious.

I stumble out of my bed, my heartbeat loud in my ears, panic making it impossible for me to think straight. I grab the edge of my drawer as the world starts to spin.

_she can't be dead she can't be dead she can't be gone she can't be. _

But as the panic slowly settles, it is instead replaced by anger. _How could she? How could she leave after everything we said last night? And without saying goodbye?!_

I take a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm down. I try to convince myself that it isn't too late yet. That there's something I can do.

And it isn't until now, when I can finally form a coherent thought again, that something hits me. Maybe she did say goodbye. Just not to me.

I try to get some control over my thought as I hurry down a couple of hallways to where Tris used to sleep, until I find Christina.

"Tobias?" she says when she sees me. "What's wrong? You look-"

"Where's Tris?" I interrupt her.

"She said she was just going to-" She pauses as she sees the look on my face. "She isn't back?"

I shake my head, my hands clenching into fists. "She went to the Erudite, which is just what Jeanine wanted."

"Oh no", she whispers, her voice shaking slightly. "Is she- do you think she's... I mean, do you-"

"No", I say abruptly. "She can't be. I think Jeanine… she'd want to use Tris to try to understand the Divergent. She won't k-kill her yet."

Christina's eyes are blank with tears as she frowns.

"What should we do?"

"I'm going to go get her."

I turn around, starting to walk away, but her hand on my arm stops me.

"Wait, Four", she says. "Rushing in there like that will only get you killed."

"So?" I say, frustrated. "I don't care. I need to find Tris."

"You won't be able to save her", she says. "Not like that. We need a plan."

"I don't _have _a plan!" I shout. "And we don't have much time!"

"I know!" she says. "But luckily for you, I do."


	31. Still Waiting

In just a few minutes, Christina and I've met up with Tori and the other leaders and formed a brief plan, consisting of three big tasks. Number one; I get in. Number two; I find the two control rooms and make sure we stay alive. And finally number three; We attack. Shouldn't be too hard.

"Tobias", Tori says, a hand on my shoulder, pulling me out of my panicked-hazed state of mind and back to reality.

"Hm?" I say.

"There's one… one more thing I need to ask of you."

"What?"

She opens her mouth, but then she frowns and looks away.

"What is it?" I repeat sternly.

"You can't go yet", she says finally. "You have to wait until tomorrow."

"No way", I say, rising from my chair. "We don't have time."

"Yes we do", Tori insists. "And by then our insiders in Erudite will have more information. They'll know how much time we have before Tris's execution."

I flinch at her words. Worry and anger dwell up inside me.  
"And what if they change their minds?" I say, my voice hoarse. "What if they decide to kill her before that? Before I even have the chance to get to her?"

"I'm sorry, Tobias, but if you leave right now it'd be suicide", says Tori. "You'd be of a lot more use if you could just... wait."

I shake my head, clenching my teeth together. "No. No, I can't."

"Tobias, please", Tori says, reaching out for my arm, but I pull away, backing away from them.

"Tobias", says a new voice. Christina steps forward from where she was leaning against a wall. Her eyes are blank with held back tears.

"Tori's right", she says. "Leaving right now wouldn't be of any use to us or to Tris. You want to save her, right? Then you _have to wait."  
_"I can't", I whisper. "I can't just sit here and wait, while they-"

I press my lips together, refusing to finish the sentence.

"I know", says Christina, and her lower lip wobbles slightly. "I _know_ how you feel, Tobias. You know I do. I want her back too."

The anger starts to settle inside me as the meaning of her words sinks in. Of course she knows. Tris is her best friend. She must be as worried as I am.

But that doesn't change the fact I still _can't_ wait until tomorrow. Just the thought of going to sleep without _her_ makes me feel sick.

And somehow Christina must understand that, because she suddenly turns toward Tori.

"Tonight", she says. "He can leave tonight. With or without the information."

Tori hesitates for a moment, and then nods, probably realizing it's the best she'll get. "Alright."

I take in a deep breath, clenching my fists.

"Tobias, you'll do this for Tris, okay?" Christina says.

And so I have no choice but to nod.

That day is the longest one ever. I pass the time by taking a shower, changing into clean clothes and walking around the halls. One time, I pass by the cafeteria, hearing the cheerful chatter of people and realize it's almost dinnertime. I'll be able to leave soon.

I lean against one of the cold walls outside the cafeteria, sinking into a crouch. I lean my elbows against my legs and cover my face with my palms.

It's weird that I feel so empty now. It's not like Tris and I spend every waking hour with each other. Some days, when we've had a fight or something, we'd go an entire day without talking. But then, I'd always known she was here. Now she's just gone. And I can feel it in every part of my body.

I don't know how long I've been sitting there, against the wall with my eyes closed, when Christina says my name.

I open my eyes and look at her. She's handing me a gun.

"Time to go", she says.

I get up, taking the gun from her.

"Did the insider get the information in time?" I ask her.

"Yeah," she nods. "Tris's execution is scheduled fourteen days from now."

I press my lips together. Two weeks in Erudite headquarters, at the most. I can do that.

We walk toward the exit in silence.

"You okay?" Christina asks me after a while.

I'm about to automatically reply that 'yes, of course I'm fine.' But I don't. I'm sick of lying.

"No", I just say quietly.

"Me neither", she says with a sigh. "I should've known that she was leaving. It's just who she is."

I shake my head slightly. "It's not your fault. I was with her last night. She promised she wouldn't go, but she was lying. Of course she was. I shouldn't have let my guard down."

"No, you can't think like that", says Christina. "It's only natural to take her word for it."

I don't say anything. We stop in front of the glass doors leading out of the Dauntless building. The sunset outside is a beautiful shade of pink and reminds me of when I exited these doors with Tris to go meet my mother.  
"Good luck", Christina says.

I nod, give her a brief smile, and walk out the doors.

Getting into the Erudite building unnoticed isn't easy. My plan is to get as far as I can before getting captured, maybe even as far as to finding one of the control rooms.

I manage to knock out an Erudite guard by the entrance and put on his blue jacket over my white shirt. Now that I'm looking less suspicious, and more like an Erudite, I hurry past the reception and along a couple of hallways. As I hear voices I straighten up, trying to mimic the Erudite's way of holding themselves. Two Erudite guards pass by me, and keep talking to each other without paying much attention to me. I breathe out, relieved. I didn't realize that I had held my breath.

And then my muscles freeze as strong arms wrap around me from behind, locking my arms to my body. Cold fingers brush my neck and I realize that they must've looked back and seen my tattoo. How stupid of me.

"Dauntless", a man's voice breathes.

"Are you sure?" The other man says hesitantly.  
"Of course, he's got his back covered in tattoos!"

_I need to do something I need to do something NOW_

I suddenly jerk my body backwards, angling my head toward where I one of the voices came from, catching them by surprise. The back of my head meets something hard and the guard whose nose I just broke yells in pain. I twist out of the other man's grip and hit him in the jaw with the barrel of my gun. He falls to the ground. I turn around, aiming my gun at the other guard whose face is covered in blood. He throws himself at me, dodging the bullet I fire from my gun, and he throws me into the wall. I feel the gun slip out of my limp hand. I stumble to my feet immediately, ignoring the dizziness as I punch him in the jaw. I dive for my gun and slam it into his temple as he comes at me. His eyes roll back as his limp body slump to the floor. I touch my fingertips to my temple where my head hit the wall and they come away red with blood. I swear quietly and wipe the blood away with the blue jacket before taking it off. I'll look more suspicious with a bloody blue jacket than without one.

I hurry down the corridors, knowing that the yell and gunfire must've attracted more guards. I finally find the right door. The sign next to it says "CONTROL-B." I found the first one.

I suddenly hear a yell and spin around, seeing five Dauntless traitors hurrying toward me. I lift my gun, preparing myself…

That's when a sharp pain cuts through the back of my head and spreads to the rest of my body before everything goes black.


	32. When Fear Triumphs Pain

When I wake up I'm completely disoriented. My back is aching and the ground feels cool against my body, so I must be on the floor. I sit up, stretching my body, and trying to adjust my eyes to the darkness of the room. That's when the door slams open and two guards step into the room.  
"Get up", one of them orders sharply.  
I blink a couple of times against the bright light pouring in through the door. From the looks of it I'm in some kind of cell, but I have no idea how long I've been here.

The guards approach me, grabbing me by the arms and pulling me to my feet. They start to lead me out of the room, but I struggle against them.

"Where are you taking me?" I demand. "I want to see Tris!"

They ignore me and keep pulling me toward the doors. I realize that they're not going to be cooperative; they simply follow their orders. I'm just a problem in need to be dealt with to them.

So I throw myself toward the guard on my left. We both fall to the ground, pulling the second guard down with us. I stumble to my feet, punching the first one in the jaw.

The second guard comes up behind me, wraps an arm around my neck and throws me to the ground. Then his fist reaches my face and he punches me several times before they grab my arms and pull me up again. The first guard wipes some blood of his jaw, clearly annoyed. Because I'm not a real threat to them- just an inconvenience.

As they guide me through the corridors I try to focus on the signs and remembering the turns, but it's difficult since the blows to my face has made my vision blurry. The pain has already dulled to a faint stinging feeling at the side of my face.

As we turn and walk into the longest hallway yet, my vision suddenly becomes a little sharper. Because at the other end of the corridor, a blonde girl appears, followed by none other than Peter. His hand is on her shoulder as she stops in the middle of a step at the sight of me. I see her mouth moving, but I'm too far away to hear anything.

The guards brusquely push me forward, and I feel the barrel of a gun press against the back of my head, as they force me to keep walking. I hadn't even realized that I slowed down.

Tris mumbles something, too quietly for me to hear. But then, as we get closer, the sound of her voice finally reaches my ears and I'm reminded just how much I missed it.

"What did you do?" she repeats franticly.

We keep walking toward each other, each step bringing me closer to being able to touch her.

"What did you do?" she screams again.

My entire body aches for her, to comfort her, to tell her everything will be okay. But I can't do that without revealing our plan. And that _can't_ happen.

"You die, I die too", I say, pulling off the only lie that will convince everyone, even her. It was so close to being the truth. "I asked you not to do this. You made your decision. These are the repercussions."

And so our paths cross and we're both forced to keep walking.

I knew when I walked into Erudite headquarters that I would be captured eventually. I knew that I wouldn't just get the location of the control rooms and then leave. So I was also prepared that they were going to want information from me. And I am _not _about to give it to them without a fight.

So I take their kicks and punches as best as I can. I might be screaming, I don't really know. I only know that I'm on the floor and the world's spinning. Someone is shouting questions at me but the pain is everywhere and it's too strong and sharp for my mind to work properly. But even if I could understand them, I wouldn't give them the answer.

After a while it stops. I hear people leave the room- leaving me with the empty quietness. The silence feels nice, and I realize that must be because I'd been screaming for so long. My throat feels dry and my ribs ache and my face feels numb but I don't care. I didn't give it to them. That's all that matters.

After a while of lying on the cold floor I manage to sit up, my hand pressed against my side as if to hold myself together. I lean back against the wall, breathing heavily.

_I can manage_, is what I keep telling myself. I can hold on. I _will_ hold on.

Some time after that I must've dozed off, because I wake up what must be several hours later. I try to change position against the wall but pain as sharp as the blade of a knife cuts through my side and I gasp, freezing where I am.

The door suddenly swings open and three Dauntless traitor guards enter the room. I blink against the strong, white light from outside my cell.

"Wakey wakey", one of them says.

"Time to go", says another one.

I clench my teeth together, leaning heavily against the wall as I get to my feet. Then I stumble over to the door and the guards immediately restrain me. I'm too tired to try and fight them off.

I don't know where we're going, but they're taking me through several hallways, every step making my ache all over. I try to keep myself straight to minimize the pain.

We stop outside a set of doors and walk inside, into a room with machines and Dauntless traitors along the walls- and Jeanine Matthews.

"What is this?" I ask her.

And then my heart nearly stops, because I see her. Tris, bound to a table in the middle of the room.

"Tris", I breathe, straining toward her, but the Dauntless guards hold me back.

"Tris, are you okay?"

I study her face; search her body for any bruises or other injuries. I can't seem to find any.

"Yeah", she says. "Are you?"

I nod, although the marks on my face must suggest otherwise.

"Rather than waste any more time, Mr. Eaton, I thought I would take the most logical approach", Jeanine Matthew says, stepping forward. "Truth serum would be preferable, of course, but it would take days to coerce Jack Kang into handing some over, as it is jealously guarded by the Candor, and I'd rather not waste a few days."

"In a few seconds, I will inject Tris with this liquid", she explains, and I suddenly notice the syringe in her hand. I frown.

"At that point," Jeanine continues, "I trust your selfless instincts will take over and you will tell me exactly what I need to know."

"What does she need to know?" Tris asks me.

"Information about the factionless safe houses", I say, not shifting my eyes from Jeanine.

"Don't give it to her", says Tris intently. "I'm going to die anyway. Don't give her anything."

_No, you will _not_ die_,_ Tris,_ is what I want to tell her.

"Remind me, Mr. Eaton. What do Dauntless simulations do?" asks Jeanine me.

"This isn't a classroom", I say, annoyed. "Tell me what you're going to do."

"I will if you answer my very simple question."

"Fine." I look over at Tris. Her familiar appearance gives me strength. "The simulations stimulate the amygdala, which is responsible for processing fear, induce a hallucination based on that fear, and then transmit the data to a computer to be processed and observed."

"Very good", Jeanine says, obviously pleased. "When I was developing the Dauntless simulations, year ago, we discovered that certain levels of potency overwhelmed the brain and made it too insensible with terror to invent new surroundings, which was when we diluted the solution so that the simulations would be more instructive. But I still remember how to make it. Fear, is more powerful than pain." She lifts the syringe. "So is there anything you'd like to say, before I inject Ms. Prior?"

I feel like my insides are being torn apart. I'd do anything to get Tris out of here, alive and unharmed. But I can't give up the locations, can I? So I press my lips together. If Tris can be strong; I can be too. I just have to remind myself that she _isn't _dead.

And so Jeanine presses the syringe into Tris's neck.

At first, nothing happens. Then, in just a few seconds, the heart monitor next to Tris show that her heart is starting to race. I clench my teeth together, and try to look away.

It's dead quiet in the room. The only sound comes from her rapid breathing.

Then she screams. The sound is heartbreaking and I have trouble breathing and I struggle against the arms holding me back and

she won't

stop

screaming.

Her body fights against the ropes holding her down and she screams and cries and screams. She's not strong anymore and I'm not strong either.

"Stop!" I shout, still fighting the restrains. "I'll tell you, just stop!"

Jeanine smiles triumphantly. "Sedative."

One of the Dauntless traitors step forward with another syringe. they inject her with the liquid and she finally, _finally_ stops screaming, and her body relaxes again.

She blinks a couple of times, looking around the room and then at me and there are tears in her eyes and my entire body aches for her.

"Let me go", I say, my voice unsteady. "That's the only way I'll tell you, is if you let me go."

Jeanine nods and the arms are finally gone and I stumble over to Tris, my hands searching her hands and cheek and hair. It feels like ages ago since I was able to touch her.

"The factionless safe houses", I say, closing my eyes as I lean my forehead against hers. "Get me a map and I'll mark them for you."

I take a couple of deep breaths, pulling away slightly so that I can look at her. Her skin is pale and her eyes are swollen from crying but they are still her eyes, it is still her hair, it's her, her, _her_.

But then the Dauntless traitor guards are back and they're pulling at my arms and I'm not touching her anymore, and when I can no longer see her it feels like we're a million miles apart.

**Woah, this chapter was kind of a long one! It was a really emotional chapter I think personally, and it was a lot of fun to write and interpret from Tobias' POV.****I really hope you enjoyed reading it too, please leave a review telling me if you did or what you thought, it really does give me the motivation to keep going and I read every single on of them. Thanks for staying with me guys! 3 See y'all next time.**


	33. Mission One Accomplished

It's the next day- at least I think it's been a day- when a Dauntless guard opens the door to my cell, once again ready to escort me somewhere. I let him guide me through the hallways without any struggle, my mind too busy with forming a plan.

I don't know if it's fate, or just a coincidence, but when we walk down the corridor with the showers Tris and Peter appear at the other end, just like before. My body tenses up automatically, but I keep walking. I know that it's time. I need to find the second control room, and I need to talk to Tris. It's now or never; I might not get another chance like this.  
We near each other, one step at a time, her small frame coming closer and closer.

I drop to the floor.

I manage to catch my guards by surprise. They don't have time to react or grab a new hold of me before I shoot up from the ground, snatching a gun from one of my guards and fire at him. Somewhere from the corner of my eye I see Tris and Peter diving to the side, probably in search of cover, but I don't have time to focus on them for long.

I kick another Dauntless traitor in the stomach, incapacitating him briefly. Then I spin around, pointing my gun at Peter. But he has already moved away from Tris. I grab her arm, helping her stand up, and pull her with me as I start to run.

After a few minutes of running, Tris starts to slow down.

"Tobias", she says, breathless. I stop, turning around to look at her. There are tears in her eyes and a smudge of blood at the side of her head. I remember seeing her hit the wall.

"Oh no", I say, gently letting my fingertips touch her cheek. "Come on. On my back."

I crouch, allowing her to climb onto my back. Aside from the slight twinge of pain in my side she's easy to carry.

I start to run again, trying to focus on my breath. She might not be heavy, but the strain is still harder on my body and lungs.

"Tobias," Tris suddenly says, "you missed it."

"Missed… what?" I say, out of breath.

"An exit."

"Not trying to escape", I explain. "We'd get shot if we did. Trying to... find something."

'Something', meaning the second control room.

I run through hallway after hallway and through a room with offices before I find it; the door with a sign saying I've found "CONTROL-A".

I take out the nearby cameras with my gun before letting Tris slide off my back.

"Time to get down", I tell her. "No more running, I promise."

I take her hand, guiding her past the control room and into a room filled with shelves with food and other supplies. I block the door with a chair before turning toward Tris.

"I don't have much time, so I'm going to be direct", I say, my eyes seeking hers as she nods. "I didn't come here on some suicide mission. I came for two reasons. The first was to find Erudite's two central control rooms so that when we invade, we'll know what to destroy first to get rid of all the simulation data, so she can't activate the Dauntless's transmitters."

Her eyes turn thoughtful for a second, understanding crossing her face.

"The second," I continue, "is to make sure you hold on, because we have a plan."

"What plan?" she says hesitantly.

"According to one of our insiders, your execution is tentatively scheduled for two weeks from today. At least, that's Jeanine's target date for the new, Divergent-proof simulation. So fourteen days from now, the factionless, the loyal Dauntless, and the Abnegation who are will to fight will storm the Erudite compound and take out their best weapon- their computer system. That means we'll outnumber the traitor Dauntless, and therefore the Erudite."

"But you told Jeanine where the factionless houses were", Tris points out.

"Yeah. That is problematic", I say, frowning. "But as you and I know, a lot of the factionless are Divergent, and many of them were already moving toward the Abnegation sector when I left, so only some of the safe houses will be affected. So they will still have a huge population to contribute to the invasion."

Tris eyes shift away from mine, her lower lip wobbling slightly. She suddenly looks so endlessly tired.  
"I don't…" she says, her voice shaking from choking back tears. "I can't… make it… that long."

"Tris, you have to. You have to survive this."

I feel sorry for her, I do. My heart aches when I see how this has broken her. But she has to get through this, both for herself_ and_ for me. And I truly believe that she will. No matter how bad she feels it's in her nature to make it. She'll survive this.

"Why?" she whimpers. "Why do I have to? Why can't someone else do something for once? What if I don't want to do this anymore?"

And I realize it's not just this that has broken her. It's the death of her parents. It has dimmed the path forward for her, and she hasn't been able to see a way to move on without them ever since.

"I know. I know it's hard. The hardest thing you've had to do." I wrap my arms around her, ignoring the shaking of her head, slipping my fingers through her hair. "I can't force you. I can't make you want to survive this. But you will do it." I let my hand slide down her neck, across her back to rest on her shoulder. "You will, because that's who you are."

And then she kisses me. And for the first time in a long time, she doesn't feel fragile anymore. She feels strong again, like she did during initiation. And we kiss like we did back then, before the attack. Without hesitation, not holding back, my hand tangling in her hair and running down her side. Then we break apart as the doors open, Dauntless traitors filing into the supply closet. I immediately surrender my gun, offering it to one of the traitors to prove that I want no trouble. It actually surprised me that it took them this long to find us. Maybe that means we have an even bigger chance to actually win this.

**I'm so sorry it took me this long to update! I've just been so busy. Thanks for not giving up on me guys! I have been reading all your reviews and I've been trying to write as much as possible. Hope you enjoyed this chapter though and I'll see y'all soon! **


	34. Frenemies

Something's boiling.

I can feel it in the air, even though i'm completely alone in my cell. Alone in this darkness with only my own thoughts as company.

It's been like this for about a day. Maybe more, I can't tell anymore. I feel like the silence is beginning to drive me insane.

There are guards on a 24/7 watch outside my door. I glare at them through the window in my door for a while, then I get up and start banging at the door.

"Open the door!" I shout. "I need to talk to you."

One of the guards pushes a couple of buttons and the door slide open. I stumble away from it.

"What's going on?" I demand as the door closes behind the guards. "Where's Tris?"

The guards exchange a brief glance, then return to scowling at me.

"Where is she? I want to see her!" I exclaim. "I wanna see her!"

"Shut up", one of the guards growl. "We don't even know who you're talking about."

"Tris!" I snarl. "I want to see her!"

Then something moves outside the door, a silhouette visible in front of the light from the window. And I recognize her immediately. Of course I do. _Tris_.

It feels as though a heavy weight is lifted of my chest as I walk up to the window, matching the palm of my hand to hers on the window. Even though there's a thick layer of glass preventing us from touching, I can almost imagine the warmth of her skin against mine. I lean my head against the cool glass, closing my eyes for a brief second.

When I open them again, she's gone. I feel my heart sink to the bottom of my stomach, and I try to swallow the lump in my throat.

The guards snort at me, push me brusquely away from the door, scan a keycard and exit the room. The door clicks shut after them and I'm alone again.

(***)

I sink to the floor next to the door. I don't know how long it takes before I hear the beeps of the buttons to open the door again.  
I rise with a sigh, annoyed, assuming that it's the guards coming to torture me again or something.

"What do-" I begin, and then I see Peter, carrying Tris. Or rather, Tris's body.  
My heart stops and my body goes cold as I see her, lips slightly blue.

She's dead. She's _dead. _My Tris is _gone._

Panic spreads through my body, my heartbeat loud in my ears.

"Oh my god. Oh-"

"Spare me your blubbering, okay?" says Peter. "She's not dead; she's just paralyzed. It'll only last for about a minute. Now get ready to run."

It takes a couple of seconds for his word to register in my brain, before I'm calm enough to speak.

"Let me carry her", I say, eyes fixed on Tris's closed eyes.

"No. You're a better shot than I am. Take my gun. I'll carry her."

Anger bubbles up inside of me, but I know that he is right, so I just take the gun. And then we run. I follow Peter through hallways, the gun ready at my side.

"Left!" Peter suddenly shouts.

My reflexes kick in, and I spin to the side, locating the target within seconds.

"Hey, what-!" A guard down the hallway demands.

Then I fire, and he falls to the ground.

Then we continue running. I focus on my breathing, trying to stay alert.

"Right!" Peter calls out.

I turn, aim, fire. Dead.

"Whoa", I hear Peter mutter through his breath. "Wait, stop here!"

He comes to a halt in front of a door, swinging it open, just about to hurry through it when Tris puts out an arm to stop him from smacking her head into the door frame.

"Careful!" Tris croaks.

Relief floods through me. _She's alive._

Peter turns, carrying Tris into the room head first. Then he puts her down on the floor, taking a few steps away to catch his breath.

I kneel next to her, fear and concern pumping through my body.

"Tris", I say, searching her face.

"Beatrice", she corrects me, her voice weak.

A small laughter escapes my lips.

"Beatrice", I agree.  
And then I kiss her.

"Unless you want me to throw up all over you guys, you might want to save it for later", Peter grunts.  
"Where are we?" Tris says.  
"This is the trash incinerator," Peter replies, patting the door. "I turned it off. It'll take us to the alley. And then your aim had better be perfect, Four, if you want to get out of the Erudite sector alive."  
"Don't concern yourself with my aim", I say sternly.  
Peter ignores the comment and opens the door to the incinerator. "Tris, you first."

Tris stumbles over to the small door and, with trouble, swing one leg into the chute. The paralytic must still be in her system. I reach down and help her lift the other leg. And then she slides down the trash chute.

A couple of seconds of silence pass, and then I hear a thump and a small grunt from her.

"Go ahead!" Tris calls up to us.  
I gesture toward the chute, eyes on Peter. He makes a face but slides his legs into the chute and down he goes.  
My legs have recovered by the time Peter lands, on his side instead of his feet. He groans, and drags himself away from the opening to recover.  
I let a couple of seconds pass before I slide down the chute after him. The smell of rotting food reaches my nose just as I drop to the floor. My knees buckle beneath me and give out, but Tris reaches for me and pulls me up. We support each other.  
"Got that gun?" Peter asks me as I guide Tris away from the incinerator; a big, metal furnace giving off a strong smell of fire and smoke.  
"No, I figured I would shoot the bullets out of my nostrils," I say sarcastically, "so I left it upstairs."  
"Oh, shut up." Peter snorts. He lifts another one of his guns and takes the lead, walking out of the incinerator room.  
As Tris and I enter the hallway, my heart flutters as I see the EXIT sign at the end of it. Almost. Soon, we'll be back home.

We charge through the door, out into the warm sunlight, breathing fresh air for the first time in days. We hurry down an alley and stop at the end of it. I press myself against the corner of a building, peeking around the edge. Two Dauntless guards are standing along the other wall, faces made of stone. They can't see me yet. I reach for my gun, take aim with support from the concrete wall, and fire. I hit one of them straight in the gut, the other one in the arm. But it's enough to incapacitate them.

"Hurry", I urge Tris and Peter.  
The sound of gunshots will surely attract more guards.

And so we take off into a run again, Peter leading the way. I look around, trying to figure out where he's taking us, until I realize he has no goal. He's just trying to get away, as fast as possible.

"Take the least logical route!" I yell at him.

"What?" Peter shouts back, confused.

"The least logical route, so they won't find us!"  
Peter abruptly turns left, and we head down an alley filled with junk and boxes. I sway slightly to the left, narrowly avoiding tripping over a pile of dirty blankets.  
And then suddenly, we're right in front of Erudite Headquarters again.  
"Bad idea!" Tris exclaims, declaring what had just gone through my head.  
More running follows. We're all gasping for air by now, but we can't stop yet.

Then Tris does. She grabs a hold of Peters arm and pull him toward the closest building to our right. I realize what she's doing; stopping is the last thing they'd expect us to do. It's the least logical thing.

_Smart._

The door to the building is locked, so I put a bullet in the nearest window and reach in, unlocking the door.  
We hide under a stairwell meant for escaping during fires, all three of us heavily panting.  
"What?" Peter suddenly says, looking at Tris. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"How did you do it?" Tris asks him.  
"It wasn't that hard. I dyed a paralytic serum purple and switched it out with the death serum. Replaced the wire that was supposed to read your heartbeat with a dead one. The bit with the heart monitor was harder; I had to get some Erudite help with a remote and stuff—you wouldn't understand it if I explained it to you."  
Tris ignores the last comment, and says instead; "Why did you do it? You want me dead. You were willing to do it yourself! What changed?"  
Peter stays quiet for a while, not breaking eye contact with Tris. His eyes look thoughtful.  
"I can't be in anyone's debt," he finally says. "Okay? The idea that I owed you something made me sick. I would wake up in the middle of the night feeling like I was going to vomit. Indebted to a Stiff? It's ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. And I couldn't have it."  
"What are you talking about? You owed me something?"

"The Amity compound", Peter explains, looking annoyed. "Someone shot me—the bullet was at head level; it would have hit me right between the eyes. And you shoved me out of the way. We were even before that—I almost killed you during initiation, you almost killed me during the attack simulation; we're square, right? But after that . . ."  
"You're insane," I interrupt him. "That's not the way the world works . . . with everyone keeping score."  
"It's not?" Peter raises his eyebrows at me. "I don't know what world you live in, but in mine, people only do things for you for one of two reasons. The first is if they want something in return. And the second is if they feel like they owe you something."  
"Those aren't the only reasons people do things for you," I protest. "Sometimes they do them because they love you." I pause. "Well, maybe not _you_, but . . ."

"That's exactly the kind of garbage I expect a delusional Stiff to say", Peter says, rolling his eyes.

"I guess we just have to make sure you owe us", I say. "Or you'll go running to whoever offers you the best deal."

I can't stop thinking about how insane that sounds, and how stupid he must be for thinking that that's how we're supposed to live.  
"Yeah. That's pretty much how it is", Peter says with a shrug.  
Tris shakes her head, but doesn't say any more.  
"So when can we get out of here, you think?" Peter asks.  
"Couple hours," I guess. "We should go to the Abnegation sector. That's where the factionless and the Dauntless who aren't wired for simulations will be by now."  
"Fantastic," Peter mutters.

I ignore him, putting an arm around Tris's shoulders, and I'm reminded how happy I am that she's not dead. She leans into me and closes her eyes, and for the first time in several days, I finally feel relaxed.

**Oh, hi, guys… *****nervous laugh*****. I'm sorry I haven't updated in a super long time! I know this is the worst apology in the world but school has really kept me busy. But I got a random review recently and it sparked my motivation, so I thought I'd give you guys a chapter. I really hope you all like it, and that you haven't given up on me finishing this story. I swear I will, no matter how long it takes.**

**Hope to see y'all soon again! **


	35. Back in Grey

After a lot of walking, we finally reach the Abnegation sector. I finally feel like I can relax again. We're safe.

Tris is a trooper, stumbling along barefoot, looking like she might pass out any second. I keep my hand wrapped around hers, needing to feel her alive.

Peter walks a few feet behind us, and I don't pay him much attention.

Suddenly, I notice Uriah and Christina standing on the sidewalk further away from us.

"Tris?" Uriah calls out when he sees us. He drops his gun and starts to run toward Tris, Christina trailing behind.  
I put my hand on his shoulder when he reaches us, to keep him from embracing Tris. From the way she looks, I can tell that she's not up for a conversation right now.

"She's been through a lot. She just needs to sleep", I say. "She'll be down the street- number thirty-seven. Come visit tomorrow."

Uriah hesitates for a second, before nodding. "Okay. Tomorrow."

Tris, Peter and I continue toward my old house, Tris and Christina exchanging a brief reunion as we pass.

Then we walk through the door into my father's house, and I force myself to shove down the emotions the sight of it dig up; I'll deal with them later.  
Tris and Peter follow me into the kitchen, where we find Tori, Harrison and Evelyn.

Tris stops to lean against the wall as my mother approaches me, smiling and wrapping an arm around me. Her hand touches my face.  
"I'm so glad you're back", she says. I give her a smile back.  
Then turn back toward Tris, putting an arm around her waist, and guide her toward the stairs. We walk into my old bedroom, which still looks untouched.

"Marcus didn't go into this room after I left," I say, "I'm pretty sure. Because nothing was moved when I came back here."

I look down at Tris, and see her gazing at the blue sculpture standing on my dresser.

"My mother smuggled that to me when I was young", I tell her. "Told me to hide it. The day of the ceremony, I put it on my dresser before I left. So he would see it. A small act of defiance."

It felt good. That sculpture represented the best choice I ever made- and probably the first choice that I ever made completely for myself.

"Let's take care of your feet", I say.

"Okay."

When we enter the bathroom, Tris sits down on the edge of the bathtub, and I join her. I turn the tap on, plugging the drain to keep the water in the tub. The water washes over our feet, and it's immediately stained by blood from the cuts on Tris's feet. I crouch, taking one of her feet into my lap. I use a towel to clean the wounds on her feet, and she doesn't even so much as flinch. She doesn't react as I rub them with soap. I guess she's been through too much to be bothered by feet that should be stinging.

When I'm done, she takes the soap from me and covers her hands with it. Then she takes my hands in hers and rubs them against each other, washing away all the filth. I try to appreciate the moment as much as possible; her hands against mine, touching me again. She's not locked away in a room anymore, or worse, dead. She's here.

I reach for another towel, drying her hands and then mine.

"I don't… My family is all dead, or traitors; how can I…" The sorrow in her voice is obvious, and I pull her toward me as she starts to cry. I keep her there, close to me, until she seems to calm down again.

"I'll be your family now", I say gently.

"I love you", is all she says.

I've heard people say 'I love you' before. My mom used to say it before she disappeared.

But this is different. Hearing her say it… it means more than anything.  
"Say it again", I ask.

"Tobias, I love you."

And that's all she needs to say. Those three simple words fill my body with warmth, with calmness, and suddenly, I want nothing more than to be close to her again.

I wrap my arms around her, and let my lips touch the skin right above her collarbone, by the tattoo. Then I move them up toward her cheek, and then finally, they meet hers.

"I love you too", I say.  
She smiles- it's small, but it's there. I smile back.

"I'll get you something to wear", I say. I fetch a t-shirt from my room and leave her to get ready in the bathroom. Then I change out of my own wet clothes into a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.  
I sit down on my bed and just look out the window. The sun has just set, and I'm already tired. My thoughts and emotions about coming back here are a mess, but I bury them deep down inside me. It's just a house. It doesn't mean anything to me anymore. The memories will always be there, but I'm used to ignoring them. They can't hurt me.

The door opens and Tris walks inside. She climbs into the bed, wrapping the blanket around herself. I lie next to her and she rests her head against my chest. This is good. This is all I need, for now.

oooOOOooo

Tris is still asleep when I wake up. She looks so peaceful, finally resting, that I can't bring myself to wake her up.

I walk down the stairs, joining the crowd in the living room. There are factionless, Candor, Dauntless. Everyone is here, and everyone belongs here. It's a strange feeling. We've always been taught to stay divided into our factions, and to keep away from the factionless. We were separated by different values. But now, we all stand here as equals, as one. No one on the outside.

"Morning", Uriah says as he sees me. He's sitting on the couch next to Christina and Lynn. "Is Tris awake?"

I shake my head. "She'll be up soon, I'm sure."

"Tobias", Evelyn says. "Would you like something to eat?"

She gestures toward a bunch of opened tin cans.

"Hmm", I say, thinking about it. "I feel like scrambled eggs."

She smiles. "There are eggs in the kitchen."

I nod. I've always enjoyed eating scrambled eggs. I remember Evelyn used to make them all the time when I was little.  
The smell of food attracts a couple of people. Christina and Uriah try it out, and while Uriah seems to like it, Christina spits it out almost immediately. I can't help but laugh at her.

"That's gross", she says. "Why would anyone eat that?"

I fill a can that used to contain peas with the scrambled eggs and move into the living room, finding a spot next to the coffee table. Then I just sit there, listening to people talk and joining in when I feel the need to. It's weird how comfortable I feel around these strangers. There's no pressure to be, well, anything. We can all just be ourselves. Maybe this isn't so bad after all. Maybe being factionless was never a fate worse than death, like I'd always thought of it.

Suddenly, the voices in the room ebb out. I turn, looking at the doorway. There stands Tris, Uriah, Christina and Lynn, although all eyes are on Tris. I remember that they all thought Jeanine had killed her, yet here she is, alive.

My mother clears her throat. "Everyone, this is Tris Prior. I believe you may have heard a lot about her yesterday."

**A/N: My god, it's been like half a year since I updated this story! So sorry for the wait (if anyone's still waiting.) But I promised to finish this story and I will try to stay true to that. I'm very busy with school right now, but I had some free time so I decided to write some chapters. Do you still want me to finish this story? If you do, please tell me that and what you thought about this chapter in the reviews. You guys' support is all that keeps me going. Thanks for reading!**


	36. War Plans

Tris looks uncomfortable with all the attention.  
"And Christina, Uriah, and Lynn", I add, trying to help her out.

Tris's eyes sweep around the room, like she doesn't know what to do.

"Aren't you supposed to be dead?" A factionless man suddenly asks.

That evokes some laughter.

"Supposed to be", Tris replies with a stiff smile.  
"We don't like to give Jeanine Matthews what she wants, thought", I say. I rise, walking up to her and offering her the can with scrambled eggs. She takes it, and we sit down again. I reach for a random can, which turns out to be peaches, as Tris tastes the scrambled eggs. Then she passes it on to Christina and take the peaches from me.

"Why is everyone camped out in Marcus's house?" Tris asks.

"Evelyn kicked him out", I reply with a smile. "Said it was her house too, and he'd gotten to use it for years, and it was her turn. It caused a huge blowup on the front lawn, but eventually Evelyn won."

She'd told me this before I went to Erudite after Tris, so I'd know where to return to.

I notice that Tris has put the can of peaches down, after barely touching it.  
"There's bread somewhere", I say, scanning the room for the bread basket and passing it to Tris. "Take two pieces. You need it."

She doesn't protest, just looks over to the other side of the room as she eats. I follow her gaze to find my mother talking to Peter.

"I think she's trying to recruit him. She has a way of making the factionless life sound extraordinarily appealing."

"Anything to get him out of Dauntless", Tris says sourly. "I don't care if he saved my life, I still don't like him."  
"Hopefully we won't have to worry about faction distinctions anymore by the time this is over. It'll be nice, I think."

She doesn't reply to that, but I get the feeling that she disagrees.  
Then someone, who can't be anyone other than Edward, the initiate, walks in the room. Or well, he _used_ to be a Dauntless initiate. Now he was factionless.

An eye patch, a constant reminder of what the initiation and Peter did to him, covers one of his eyes.

Edward ignores the greetings he get, because he's already noticed Peter. In the blink of an eye he's crossed the room, walking up to Peter. Edward moves toward him with a jerk, scaring Peter who jolts away, into the wall.  
"Not so brave in broad daylight", says Edward as the factionless laugh.

He turns toward Evelyn. "Make sure you don't give him any utensils. Never know what he might do with them."

Edward takes the fork that Peter was holding.

"Give that back", Peter says.

Like he was waiting for that reaction, Edward immediately wraps his hand around Peter's throat, holding the fork against it.

"Keep your mouth shut around me, or I will do this again," Edward says, voice threatening, "only next time, I'll shove it right through your esophagus."

I can't help but enjoy the frightened expression on Peter's face. But then Evelyn jumps in, face stern. "That's enough", she says.

"I don't know if you know this, but Edward is a little unstable", I say to Tris.

"I'm getting that."

"That Drew guy, who helped Peter perform that butter-knife maneuver, apparently when he got kicked out of Dauntless, he tried to join the same group of factionless Edward was a part of. Notice that you haven't seen Drew anywhere."

It felt good to share the big amount of gossip I'd heard in being here just less than a day.

"Did Edward kill him?" Tris asks me.

"Nearly. Evidently that's why that other transfer- Myra, I think her name was?- left Edward. Too gentle to bear it."

Her face remains neutral, and I understand how she feels. No harm done there. Drew was a bad guy, and he probably just got what he deserved.

"I don't want to talk about this", Tris says.

"Okay." I reach for her shoulder, remembering how she just lost her entire Abnegation family. "Is it hard for you to be in an Abnegation house again? I meant to ask before. We can go somewhere else, if it is."

She looks around a little. "Yes. But not as hard as you might think."

I lift my eyebrows at that.

"Really", she ensures me. "The simulations in Erudite headquarters… helped me, somehow. To hold on, maybe." She hesitates. "Or maybe not. Maybe they helped me stop holding on so tightly. Someday I'll tell you about it."

A distant expression crosses her face. I let my fingertips touch her cheeks, and then, ignoring all the people in the room, I kiss her.

"Whoa there, Tobias. Weren't you raised a stiff?" Someone says. "I thought the most you people did was… graze hands or something."

"Then how do you explain all the Abnegation children?" I shoot back, humored.

"They're brought into being by sheer force of will", a woman says. "Didn't you know that, Tobias?"

I can't help but smile at that. "No, I wasn't aware. My apologies."

oooOOOooo

Later that day, Tris tells me that she wants to take a walk, alone. I agree, thinking that it'll probably be good for her. Besides, I have some things of my own to do anyways.

After Tris has left, I seek out my mother.  
"Tobias", Evelyn says as she sees me. "We have things to discuss."

I nod. "Yeah, you have to tell me everything I've missed."

And so she does. Tori and Harrison join us in a private room and we all sit down, my mother catching me up on their plan to take down Erudite.

"We concluded a broad approach is the best strategy, splitting the factionless and Dauntless into groups with different assignments", Evelyn explains.

"So one large group will clear the building, getting rid of all the Erudite", Tori adds. "One will occupy the control rooms, another will locate and destroy the information Erudite has on us, and so on."

"Wait, getting rid of _all _the Erudite?" I repeat. "What about those who do not agree with Jeanine Matthew's ways? We slaughter them too?"

"Unfortunately, there's no way of knowing who's loyal to Erudite and whose not", says Evelyn. "Our best chance will be to assume that those who aren't loyal to Jeanine have already left her faction, and kill those who still remain there."

I clench my teeth together, but don't say anything else. I feel Evelyn's harsh eyes studying me, but refuse to look at her.

"This is war, Tobias", Harrison says intently. "There's no way we're getting through this without bloodshed. A lot of it."

I nod, staring down at my hands. "Yeah, I know."

"Okay then. So, we decided that the attack will start in three days, if everything goes as planned", Tori says. "Everyone needs to be informed and ready by then."

"Are we really going to bring everyone?" I ask.

Evelyn frowns at me. "What do you mean?"  
"Well, a lot of our people are still injected with the simulation transmitters. What if Jeanine decides to turn them on? Half our people will start to fight against us."

Harrison, Tori and Evelyn all exchange brief glances.

"You're right", Evelyn finally says. "Those who were injected with simulation transmitters will have to stay back here."

"They won't like that", says Tori. "The Dauntless want to fight."

"We'll handle them", I say. "They'll understand that it's for the best."

Harrison and Evelyn nods.

"Alright, then", Tori says. "Let's gather our people for a very important message."


End file.
